Welcome to The Litterbox
This is an area where Dr. Jeff answers questions that directly or indirectly relate to animals of any sort.
Warning: These answers may or may not be medically correct. And for further background on Dr. Jeff, there are those of us who are out in left field, but he is out in "the Rock Pile" (if you are not a Rockies Fan - those are the cheap seats). Please submit your question without the details of your animal's correct name, or any other identifying information; ie. " I was wondering about cats..." "My friend has a dog..." "Why do bees..." You get the idea. Now ask away!
And remember this is supposed to be fun!
Warning: These answers may or may not be medically correct. And for further background on Dr. Jeff, there are those of us who are out in left field, but he is out in "the Rock Pile" (if you are not a Rockies Fan - those are the cheap seats). Please submit your question without the details of your animal's correct name, or any other identifying information; ie. " I was wondering about cats..." "My friend has a dog..." "Why do bees..." You get the idea. Now ask away!
And remember this is supposed to be fun!
Changes to The Litterbox
Dr. Jeff has taken a hiatus from writing The Litterbox. If production resumes, we will be sure to let you know!
Dear Dr. Jeff, December 2018
Do dogs have DO (doggy odor)? Our GSD is not a smelly boy until we go to Lake Powell. It seems whenever we return from a few days at the lake he has a strong odor. They spend a lot of time swimming. So much that we have them all wear their life jackets. I was wondering if the heat, being wet most of the day and wearing the life jacket would cause them to sweat (for lack of a better term) and stink? Thanks Dr Jeff.
Chuck in Cedaredge
Do dogs have DO (doggy odor)? Our GSD is not a smelly boy until we go to Lake Powell. It seems whenever we return from a few days at the lake he has a strong odor. They spend a lot of time swimming. So much that we have them all wear their life jackets. I was wondering if the heat, being wet most of the day and wearing the life jacket would cause them to sweat (for lack of a better term) and stink? Thanks Dr Jeff.
Chuck in Cedaredge
Dear Chuck,
Thanks for the great question. When I was a young lad my family and I went to Lake Powell and took some tour boat out for the day and saw rainbow bridge and all the other touristy stuff. Of course this was back in the days before global warming when the lake was deeper, more full, there were still glaciers at the lake and the wind would blow in the afternoon and kick up some pretty nasty swells. Needless to say, most of my memories of Powell were puking my brains out for the 3 hour boat trip back to the marina. Fishing was probably bad that afternoon because all the fish for miles were attracted to my breakfast and lunch deck-side chumming. Of course today the EPA would close the lake for hazardous spill and millions of tax payer dollars would be allocated to study the effects of my stomach contents on a large fresh body of water. When the studies found no noticeable change from said toxic spill, the low IQ talking heads in congress and the 5 o'clock news idiots would rant that something needs to be done to avoid a national disaster and laws would be passed for all boats to install some sort of gutter system to catch puke from a seasick 10 year old. Now that I got that off my chest, let’s address your dog. German Shepherd Dogs have a higher skin pH than the average dog. That means your dog has alkaline-tending skin. This makes German Shepherds more prone to yeast infections. Yeast prefer alkaline living quarters as apposed to acidic. They also prefer moist dark environments under a heavy undercoat which your dog also has. Chuck, your dog is the perfect petri dish for growing yeast culture. Dogs with yeast dermatitis tend to smell like rotting fruit or old mildewy basements I remember as a kid back east. You can call it D.O. or B.O., I call it gross. Some people have had good luck killing the yeast with a mild acid like vinegar but then your dog will smell like apple cider vinegar, you’ll have to decide what you can put up with. Do I need to say don’t use red wine or balsamic vinegar? Good luck next summer and let me know if you see any glaciers or EPA guys in their cute little white government suits.
Dr. Jeff
Thanks for the great question. When I was a young lad my family and I went to Lake Powell and took some tour boat out for the day and saw rainbow bridge and all the other touristy stuff. Of course this was back in the days before global warming when the lake was deeper, more full, there were still glaciers at the lake and the wind would blow in the afternoon and kick up some pretty nasty swells. Needless to say, most of my memories of Powell were puking my brains out for the 3 hour boat trip back to the marina. Fishing was probably bad that afternoon because all the fish for miles were attracted to my breakfast and lunch deck-side chumming. Of course today the EPA would close the lake for hazardous spill and millions of tax payer dollars would be allocated to study the effects of my stomach contents on a large fresh body of water. When the studies found no noticeable change from said toxic spill, the low IQ talking heads in congress and the 5 o'clock news idiots would rant that something needs to be done to avoid a national disaster and laws would be passed for all boats to install some sort of gutter system to catch puke from a seasick 10 year old. Now that I got that off my chest, let’s address your dog. German Shepherd Dogs have a higher skin pH than the average dog. That means your dog has alkaline-tending skin. This makes German Shepherds more prone to yeast infections. Yeast prefer alkaline living quarters as apposed to acidic. They also prefer moist dark environments under a heavy undercoat which your dog also has. Chuck, your dog is the perfect petri dish for growing yeast culture. Dogs with yeast dermatitis tend to smell like rotting fruit or old mildewy basements I remember as a kid back east. You can call it D.O. or B.O., I call it gross. Some people have had good luck killing the yeast with a mild acid like vinegar but then your dog will smell like apple cider vinegar, you’ll have to decide what you can put up with. Do I need to say don’t use red wine or balsamic vinegar? Good luck next summer and let me know if you see any glaciers or EPA guys in their cute little white government suits.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, November 2018
What do you think about making us legal guardians of our pets versus owners? People are pushing the term ‘legal guardian’ over owner of pet on licensing forms in our state.
Sam
Dear Sam,
Good question. You did not write where you are from, but the post mark on the envelope gave me a good idea. Yeah, you could have gone to another state and mailed your letter to throw me off, but why do all that just to keep me from knowing where you live? Not only was your letter post marked, but the return address in the upper left corner of the envelope had all your information including you full name, Samantha! Ah ha, I’ve got you! You sneaky little she devil. Sometimes I feel like Inspector Clouseau of Pink Panther fame. You can't fool me,…(Dr. Susie here: There were about 10 more lines of this nonsense that I had to edit out. Dr. Jeff gets on these crazy rants. I wish he wouldn't write these litter boxes at 2 am but he tells me that’s when he's at his “best.” So we will pick up at the part where he actually answers the question without all his craziness!)…Back to your insightful question. This problem came up about 18 years ago in Arizona when Maricopa County thought it would be cute to make pet owners ‘legal guardians.’ Boy, did they step in it! As the county found out, there is a big difference between the two. When a pet owner becomes the legal guardian of a pet, the civil and criminal responsibility increases also. Although I am not an attorney, guardianship was described to me by an attorney and it goes like this: If you are the guardian of a child or pet and they get cancer you must treat them or the state can intercede on the pet or child’s behalf. It doesn't matter if you can't afford to go to CSU’s vet school and pay the $10,000 dollar bill because you are the guardian and you must. As a pet owner you can decide how much you can afford to spend, not the state. The real question here is “Can you be a responsible pet owner with or without government descriptors telling you what you can and can’t do?” Some people can’t, and that is why we have animal abuse laws that tell the stupid 1% of our population what the minimum standard of care is for both children and our pets.
Dr. Jeff
What do you think about making us legal guardians of our pets versus owners? People are pushing the term ‘legal guardian’ over owner of pet on licensing forms in our state.
Sam
Dear Sam,
Good question. You did not write where you are from, but the post mark on the envelope gave me a good idea. Yeah, you could have gone to another state and mailed your letter to throw me off, but why do all that just to keep me from knowing where you live? Not only was your letter post marked, but the return address in the upper left corner of the envelope had all your information including you full name, Samantha! Ah ha, I’ve got you! You sneaky little she devil. Sometimes I feel like Inspector Clouseau of Pink Panther fame. You can't fool me,…(Dr. Susie here: There were about 10 more lines of this nonsense that I had to edit out. Dr. Jeff gets on these crazy rants. I wish he wouldn't write these litter boxes at 2 am but he tells me that’s when he's at his “best.” So we will pick up at the part where he actually answers the question without all his craziness!)…Back to your insightful question. This problem came up about 18 years ago in Arizona when Maricopa County thought it would be cute to make pet owners ‘legal guardians.’ Boy, did they step in it! As the county found out, there is a big difference between the two. When a pet owner becomes the legal guardian of a pet, the civil and criminal responsibility increases also. Although I am not an attorney, guardianship was described to me by an attorney and it goes like this: If you are the guardian of a child or pet and they get cancer you must treat them or the state can intercede on the pet or child’s behalf. It doesn't matter if you can't afford to go to CSU’s vet school and pay the $10,000 dollar bill because you are the guardian and you must. As a pet owner you can decide how much you can afford to spend, not the state. The real question here is “Can you be a responsible pet owner with or without government descriptors telling you what you can and can’t do?” Some people can’t, and that is why we have animal abuse laws that tell the stupid 1% of our population what the minimum standard of care is for both children and our pets.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, October 2018
A couple of weeks ago I brought my dog in to see you for a second opinion. I was not happy with the services I was receiving at my other vet (I don't want to mention names) and heard your veterinary hospital and staff might be able to help. Thanks to you and your staff I have my old dog back. Why didn't my old vet see the problem and cure my dog like you? Is there a government agency that regulates you guys?
Anonymous in Delta County
Dear Anonymous,
Thanks for bringing your dog into see us. Its always a pleasure to meet new people. Right now it is 2 am, I can’t sleep, and I am writing this litterbox to get Dr. Susie off my back for another month. Now is the time when I could really pile on and complain about the quality of veterinary care in Delta county and boost my fragile male ego by belittling someone else. Why is it that when we bash someone else we feel better (as if we are perfect ourselves)? My old mentor Dr. Ambrose used to always tell me “Its hard to be perfect and good looking.” I find myself saying the same thing, but I think Dr. A. was joking, he really wasn't that good looking. Anyway, back to your question about why your other vet didn't diagnose the problem. The simple answer is
“I don't know,” but as you know I have an opinion on everything. Medicine is not as simple as we make it look. Medicine is a combination of science and art. You can’t have one with out the other and be a good doctor. Science and book knowledge are necessary for a start but what do you do when the patient doesn't respond to what the books tell us to do? This is where the art of medicine kicks in. The art of medicine is the part of medicine that is developed by learning from great mentors like Dr. Ambrose, and from experience dealing with cases that did not follow the rules in those overpriced medical books. It takes time to become an artist. Michelangelo could not have painted the Sistine Chapel the first time he picked up a paint brush. Great doctors are always learning and going to continuing education courses to stretch their knowledge base. The dirty little secret in medicine is that we don't know everything, even though some fake that they do. We all have cases that stump us and don't respond the way they are supposed to. Part of the reason we were able to diagnose and treat your dog was that I could look at what your old vet tried that did not work. That might not sound like much but it is. That’s part of the art. I also have an ace in my back pocket that gives me an advantage over all other vets in Delta county. But, no! I'm not going to tell you what that is…
Dr. Jeff
A couple of weeks ago I brought my dog in to see you for a second opinion. I was not happy with the services I was receiving at my other vet (I don't want to mention names) and heard your veterinary hospital and staff might be able to help. Thanks to you and your staff I have my old dog back. Why didn't my old vet see the problem and cure my dog like you? Is there a government agency that regulates you guys?
Anonymous in Delta County
Dear Anonymous,
Thanks for bringing your dog into see us. Its always a pleasure to meet new people. Right now it is 2 am, I can’t sleep, and I am writing this litterbox to get Dr. Susie off my back for another month. Now is the time when I could really pile on and complain about the quality of veterinary care in Delta county and boost my fragile male ego by belittling someone else. Why is it that when we bash someone else we feel better (as if we are perfect ourselves)? My old mentor Dr. Ambrose used to always tell me “Its hard to be perfect and good looking.” I find myself saying the same thing, but I think Dr. A. was joking, he really wasn't that good looking. Anyway, back to your question about why your other vet didn't diagnose the problem. The simple answer is
“I don't know,” but as you know I have an opinion on everything. Medicine is not as simple as we make it look. Medicine is a combination of science and art. You can’t have one with out the other and be a good doctor. Science and book knowledge are necessary for a start but what do you do when the patient doesn't respond to what the books tell us to do? This is where the art of medicine kicks in. The art of medicine is the part of medicine that is developed by learning from great mentors like Dr. Ambrose, and from experience dealing with cases that did not follow the rules in those overpriced medical books. It takes time to become an artist. Michelangelo could not have painted the Sistine Chapel the first time he picked up a paint brush. Great doctors are always learning and going to continuing education courses to stretch their knowledge base. The dirty little secret in medicine is that we don't know everything, even though some fake that they do. We all have cases that stump us and don't respond the way they are supposed to. Part of the reason we were able to diagnose and treat your dog was that I could look at what your old vet tried that did not work. That might not sound like much but it is. That’s part of the art. I also have an ace in my back pocket that gives me an advantage over all other vets in Delta county. But, no! I'm not going to tell you what that is…
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dad: September 2018
Do animals talk to each other?
Gus
Dear Gus,
Wow, deep question. You've asked more in six words than most in 20 plus words. The real question is does noise just come out of animal mouths without value, similar to a couple sorority sisters talking about last night’s exploits in the Hamptons, or does real communication occur due to oral vocalization. One thing we have to remember is that 90% of animal communication is non-verbal, which only leaves 10% for verbal. It’s my feeling that the 10% would be even lower except that most humans don't understand the non-verbal so our pets need to take the communication up to the next level, which is verbal. For instance, my neighbor leaves her dogs out all the time, ignores them and then they bark all night. When the non-verbal communication does not work, the dogs’ bark saying ‘let us in!’ This is a form of talk called yelling profanities. When my lovely neighbor finally lets her yelling dogs in, a pattern is set. When the dogs are bored and want in, they curse profanities until they get let in. It is my belief that animals do most of their talking when stupid humans don't pay attention to the more subtle non-verbal hints that their pets are giving them or when they are out of visual range of who they want to communicate with. A good example of this is when two packs of coyotes howl back and forth. Who knows what they are talking about but it probably goes something like this, “I wish those dogs would quit barking so we can get some sleep...” -Dad
Do animals talk to each other?
Gus
Dear Gus,
Wow, deep question. You've asked more in six words than most in 20 plus words. The real question is does noise just come out of animal mouths without value, similar to a couple sorority sisters talking about last night’s exploits in the Hamptons, or does real communication occur due to oral vocalization. One thing we have to remember is that 90% of animal communication is non-verbal, which only leaves 10% for verbal. It’s my feeling that the 10% would be even lower except that most humans don't understand the non-verbal so our pets need to take the communication up to the next level, which is verbal. For instance, my neighbor leaves her dogs out all the time, ignores them and then they bark all night. When the non-verbal communication does not work, the dogs’ bark saying ‘let us in!’ This is a form of talk called yelling profanities. When my lovely neighbor finally lets her yelling dogs in, a pattern is set. When the dogs are bored and want in, they curse profanities until they get let in. It is my belief that animals do most of their talking when stupid humans don't pay attention to the more subtle non-verbal hints that their pets are giving them or when they are out of visual range of who they want to communicate with. A good example of this is when two packs of coyotes howl back and forth. Who knows what they are talking about but it probably goes something like this, “I wish those dogs would quit barking so we can get some sleep...” -Dad
Dear Dr. Jeff, August 2018
My dog has been on Apoquel for a long time. He needs to take it year round. Is there any new drug that would be better for him to take? My sister said her vet had seen long time use cause other immune system issues.
Thanks,
Janice S.
Dear Janice:
Thanks for the great question. For the past couple of years Apoquel has been used in thousands of dogs safely with very few side effects and good efficacy for treating canine atopy. But, as with all medication if enough animals (or humans) take it, eventually you will find some that can’t handle it and will have adverse side effects. This is where the slimy lawyers step in and sue the pants off the “evil drug companies.” And we wonder why medicine costs so much. Remember, when figuring out how much to charge for a product, a manufacturer has to figure in all costs like being sued for a medication that may have a side effect which was unpredictable until enough people take it to find one. I had not heard about the long term use causing immune system problems so I got on the internet and found a sight selling bovine colostrum to fight allergies using scare tactics that would make me afraid to touch the pill let alone give it to my best friend. Let me get this straight: google and Facebook will police what I say if I might hurt some overly sensitive, basement dwelling millennial sissy who still wants mommy’s colostrum, but they won’t remove some lying capitalistic scumbag who wants to scare you into giving your dog a cows first milk that her calf should be getting, just to make a dollar off the gullible. What a screwed up world. Back to Apoquel. Apoquel is a broad spectrum janus kinase inhibiter that inhibits an over-active immune system (allergies) from becoming too over-active by not letting cytokines attach to inflammatory receptors. Because it is a broad spectrum drug, it may be suppressing other areas of the body that deal with inflammation, like the bone marrow where platelets, red blood cells and white blood cells are made. I have not seen this side effect in any of my patients, but there are rumblings throughout the veterinary community that something may be coming forth. To address this problem, Zoetis, the maker of Apoquel, has developed a new injectable medication that is more specific to just the allergy receptor(Interleukin 31) in the animal’s body. This new medication is called Cytopoint. Studies show that it lasts 4-8 weeks with little or no side effects. Just wait… someone selling reindeer colostrum from the North Pole will come out with a website telling the gullible that it causes infertility in spayed and neutered pets.
Dr. Jeff
My dog has been on Apoquel for a long time. He needs to take it year round. Is there any new drug that would be better for him to take? My sister said her vet had seen long time use cause other immune system issues.
Thanks,
Janice S.
Dear Janice:
Thanks for the great question. For the past couple of years Apoquel has been used in thousands of dogs safely with very few side effects and good efficacy for treating canine atopy. But, as with all medication if enough animals (or humans) take it, eventually you will find some that can’t handle it and will have adverse side effects. This is where the slimy lawyers step in and sue the pants off the “evil drug companies.” And we wonder why medicine costs so much. Remember, when figuring out how much to charge for a product, a manufacturer has to figure in all costs like being sued for a medication that may have a side effect which was unpredictable until enough people take it to find one. I had not heard about the long term use causing immune system problems so I got on the internet and found a sight selling bovine colostrum to fight allergies using scare tactics that would make me afraid to touch the pill let alone give it to my best friend. Let me get this straight: google and Facebook will police what I say if I might hurt some overly sensitive, basement dwelling millennial sissy who still wants mommy’s colostrum, but they won’t remove some lying capitalistic scumbag who wants to scare you into giving your dog a cows first milk that her calf should be getting, just to make a dollar off the gullible. What a screwed up world. Back to Apoquel. Apoquel is a broad spectrum janus kinase inhibiter that inhibits an over-active immune system (allergies) from becoming too over-active by not letting cytokines attach to inflammatory receptors. Because it is a broad spectrum drug, it may be suppressing other areas of the body that deal with inflammation, like the bone marrow where platelets, red blood cells and white blood cells are made. I have not seen this side effect in any of my patients, but there are rumblings throughout the veterinary community that something may be coming forth. To address this problem, Zoetis, the maker of Apoquel, has developed a new injectable medication that is more specific to just the allergy receptor(Interleukin 31) in the animal’s body. This new medication is called Cytopoint. Studies show that it lasts 4-8 weeks with little or no side effects. Just wait… someone selling reindeer colostrum from the North Pole will come out with a website telling the gullible that it causes infertility in spayed and neutered pets.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr Jeff: July 2018
I just got done reading your litterbox to Janet in Las Vegas. Who do you think you are? Not all baby boomers are the same. You insensitive jerk!!!!! I’ll never read this trash again. How can you know how another generation thinks or feels?
Wilma J. in Phoenix
Dear Wilma:
Thanks for the positive feedback. I’m not sure if this is an animal question or not. I mean I thought the litter box was supposed to be animal related even if I get distracted. I recommend that any body reading this reply, STOP and PUT THIS DOWN RIGHT NOW! It is going to get ugly. Wilma is that your real name, because the only other Wilma I know of was married to Fred Flintstone which would not make you a member of the boomer generation but caveman generation. So why your worry about Janet and the boomer generation? Here is what I think. Some people like to be angry at anything they find in life. No matter how good, they find or make something seem bad, and they like to let the rest of the world know about it. Maybe you should get off your rear end and go volunteer at some local charity or food bank instead sitting around reading some trashy rant by some trashy vet in colorado. I’ll bet you're a Facebook junky who follows everybody and makes snarky comments from your safe little retirement facility in Sun City. Maybe you’re not that person, maybe you're a boomer whose daughter has married the biker, you feel guilty and the litter box hit a sore spot. Nobody is making you read the litterbox and as for never reading this “trash” again, I bet you will read this reply. I read a ton of books on the human psyche and one thing humans can't resist is something with their name on it, so when you see your name up top you're hooked. The other thing that Americans can't resist is to do what the vet in Colorado tells them to do. So when I told you to put this letter down, I’ll bet no one did. This goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden when God told Adam and Eve not the eat the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge and what did they do?
So Wilma, I hope you're not too angry with me but I sure enjoyed replying to your letter and I have an open invitation for you. Anytime you'd like to talk about the boomer generation, I’ll buy lunch. By the way, I was born in 1961 which makes me a boomer, too. So I guess I can make comments about the boomer generation because I am one.
Dr. Jeff
I just got done reading your litterbox to Janet in Las Vegas. Who do you think you are? Not all baby boomers are the same. You insensitive jerk!!!!! I’ll never read this trash again. How can you know how another generation thinks or feels?
Wilma J. in Phoenix
Dear Wilma:
Thanks for the positive feedback. I’m not sure if this is an animal question or not. I mean I thought the litter box was supposed to be animal related even if I get distracted. I recommend that any body reading this reply, STOP and PUT THIS DOWN RIGHT NOW! It is going to get ugly. Wilma is that your real name, because the only other Wilma I know of was married to Fred Flintstone which would not make you a member of the boomer generation but caveman generation. So why your worry about Janet and the boomer generation? Here is what I think. Some people like to be angry at anything they find in life. No matter how good, they find or make something seem bad, and they like to let the rest of the world know about it. Maybe you should get off your rear end and go volunteer at some local charity or food bank instead sitting around reading some trashy rant by some trashy vet in colorado. I’ll bet you're a Facebook junky who follows everybody and makes snarky comments from your safe little retirement facility in Sun City. Maybe you’re not that person, maybe you're a boomer whose daughter has married the biker, you feel guilty and the litter box hit a sore spot. Nobody is making you read the litterbox and as for never reading this “trash” again, I bet you will read this reply. I read a ton of books on the human psyche and one thing humans can't resist is something with their name on it, so when you see your name up top you're hooked. The other thing that Americans can't resist is to do what the vet in Colorado tells them to do. So when I told you to put this letter down, I’ll bet no one did. This goes all the way back to the Garden of Eden when God told Adam and Eve not the eat the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge and what did they do?
So Wilma, I hope you're not too angry with me but I sure enjoyed replying to your letter and I have an open invitation for you. Anytime you'd like to talk about the boomer generation, I’ll buy lunch. By the way, I was born in 1961 which makes me a boomer, too. So I guess I can make comments about the boomer generation because I am one.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, June 2018
My little dog Bingo was diagnosed with cancer last week. What would have caused cancer in him?
Mary in Idaho
Dear Mary,
As I see things through my mud-tinted glasses sitting in left field, the number one thing that causes cancer is being alive. Dead animals and dead people do not get cancer (they get worms). So living may be a bad thing especially if you don’t want to die or get some horrible disease like cancer. Now I am not recommended that we all go out and take our own lives to avoid the inevitable. Just like a person who eats 3 meals a day begins to take eating for granted and thinks it a “right,” the person who wakes up every morning expects to live on and on and when a deadly disease like cancer affects their life, it is a mental train-wreck. When a starving child in a 3rd world “crap hole” gets a small handful of rice or bread they appreciate it for the life it sustains. Maybe we/I should appreciate every day we wake up healthy, with a roof over our heads, three oversized meals with snacks, and most important of all, family, friends and people that make us want live. When we are standing at the Pearly Gates and Gabriel asks us, did we go through the motions of living or were we swinging for the fence, you want to be able to answer the latter. Yeah, sure there are going to be strikes and strikeouts along the way. Those are life’s speed bumps… Wow! I didn't just get off track with that rant, I got on the wrong train. Sorry Mary, back to what causes cancer in our pets. Two things cause cancer in animals. Genetics and environment. If you have the wrong genetics and the environmental trigger to start cancer or, in some cases not let your body fight the cancer, you've got cancer. At this point in time we can't change our genetics (although this is a big part of cancer research today), so let’s look at some environmental things that may turn on the cancer gene in animals. Cigarette smoke has been implicated in causing lymphoma in dogs and cats. It may not only be by breathing the smoke, but also licking the harmful carcinogens off their skin and coat and/or other things in the environment that may collect the toxins like food and water bowls, bedding and owners skin. UV light can cause skin cancer in white animals with pink noses, eyelids and ear tips. Something we are not sure about but I’m skeptical about, are the preservatives in pet food, like nitrates and sulfates. There are all kinds of things that may turn on our cancer genes, more than I’ve just touched on. The bottom line is that the longer we and our pets live the more likely we are to get cancer. The question is… Have you lived everyday like it’s your last?
Dr. Jeff
My little dog Bingo was diagnosed with cancer last week. What would have caused cancer in him?
Mary in Idaho
Dear Mary,
As I see things through my mud-tinted glasses sitting in left field, the number one thing that causes cancer is being alive. Dead animals and dead people do not get cancer (they get worms). So living may be a bad thing especially if you don’t want to die or get some horrible disease like cancer. Now I am not recommended that we all go out and take our own lives to avoid the inevitable. Just like a person who eats 3 meals a day begins to take eating for granted and thinks it a “right,” the person who wakes up every morning expects to live on and on and when a deadly disease like cancer affects their life, it is a mental train-wreck. When a starving child in a 3rd world “crap hole” gets a small handful of rice or bread they appreciate it for the life it sustains. Maybe we/I should appreciate every day we wake up healthy, with a roof over our heads, three oversized meals with snacks, and most important of all, family, friends and people that make us want live. When we are standing at the Pearly Gates and Gabriel asks us, did we go through the motions of living or were we swinging for the fence, you want to be able to answer the latter. Yeah, sure there are going to be strikes and strikeouts along the way. Those are life’s speed bumps… Wow! I didn't just get off track with that rant, I got on the wrong train. Sorry Mary, back to what causes cancer in our pets. Two things cause cancer in animals. Genetics and environment. If you have the wrong genetics and the environmental trigger to start cancer or, in some cases not let your body fight the cancer, you've got cancer. At this point in time we can't change our genetics (although this is a big part of cancer research today), so let’s look at some environmental things that may turn on the cancer gene in animals. Cigarette smoke has been implicated in causing lymphoma in dogs and cats. It may not only be by breathing the smoke, but also licking the harmful carcinogens off their skin and coat and/or other things in the environment that may collect the toxins like food and water bowls, bedding and owners skin. UV light can cause skin cancer in white animals with pink noses, eyelids and ear tips. Something we are not sure about but I’m skeptical about, are the preservatives in pet food, like nitrates and sulfates. There are all kinds of things that may turn on our cancer genes, more than I’ve just touched on. The bottom line is that the longer we and our pets live the more likely we are to get cancer. The question is… Have you lived everyday like it’s your last?
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, May 2018
Which is better a dog or a cat?
Ann (No address given)
Ann, you sneaky little devil! Why don't you ask something more controversial like “which is better, men or women, republican or democrat, communist or capitalist, or the grand daddy of them all… secularist versus christian. I know the answer to all these controversies but will not be dragged down to the pond scum from which we all arose (if you believe the secularist crap).
Back to dogs and cats. Your question is so brief that I don't know if you mean which would make a better pet or which is the better species. By asking which is better what you are really asking is “which is superior or inferior.” Whether it is which is a superior or inferior pet, or which is an inferior or superior animal, it does not matter. Inferiority and superiority are reverse sides of the same coin. The understanding lies with realizing the coin is spurious. The truth about dogs and cats is they are what God wanted them to be. Neither inferior or superior. Humans get into trouble judging others and themselves as to being superior or inferior. LeBron James is a way better basketball player than Dr. Susie, but Dr. Susie is a way better veterinarian than LeBron can even imagine. We are all individuals and judging ourselves against others is a waste of time that should be spent on giving of ourselves to make this world a better place. We are what we are, the key is for some of us to find out what our very best is supposed to be and aim our life arrow at that target. My target is my target and as long as I’m trying to be the best I can and everybody else is doing the same society will get better (without laws telling us how to live). Once again I have been distracted from the topic at hand and Dr. Susie is breathing down my neck to get this litterbox done. So neither dogs nor cats are better, they are dogs and cats. If you’re not sure what to get, try one of each. Your veterinarian will thank you ;)
Dr. Jeff
Which is better a dog or a cat?
Ann (No address given)
Ann, you sneaky little devil! Why don't you ask something more controversial like “which is better, men or women, republican or democrat, communist or capitalist, or the grand daddy of them all… secularist versus christian. I know the answer to all these controversies but will not be dragged down to the pond scum from which we all arose (if you believe the secularist crap).
Back to dogs and cats. Your question is so brief that I don't know if you mean which would make a better pet or which is the better species. By asking which is better what you are really asking is “which is superior or inferior.” Whether it is which is a superior or inferior pet, or which is an inferior or superior animal, it does not matter. Inferiority and superiority are reverse sides of the same coin. The understanding lies with realizing the coin is spurious. The truth about dogs and cats is they are what God wanted them to be. Neither inferior or superior. Humans get into trouble judging others and themselves as to being superior or inferior. LeBron James is a way better basketball player than Dr. Susie, but Dr. Susie is a way better veterinarian than LeBron can even imagine. We are all individuals and judging ourselves against others is a waste of time that should be spent on giving of ourselves to make this world a better place. We are what we are, the key is for some of us to find out what our very best is supposed to be and aim our life arrow at that target. My target is my target and as long as I’m trying to be the best I can and everybody else is doing the same society will get better (without laws telling us how to live). Once again I have been distracted from the topic at hand and Dr. Susie is breathing down my neck to get this litterbox done. So neither dogs nor cats are better, they are dogs and cats. If you’re not sure what to get, try one of each. Your veterinarian will thank you ;)
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, April 2018
Okay, this is a totally and completely random dinner table question: Do cats, and dogs have bellybuttons? And if so, where are they located?
Thanks! Ally from Arizona
Dear Ally from AZ:
Did you know I used to live in Arizona? Man, was it hot! I hope it's cooled down some since I left. Back to your random dinner table question (I'll bet you're a teenager, old people don't use the word random). Anyway, yes, cats and dogs have belly buttons. It is actually called the umbilicus and is the place your and their umbilical cord attached when you all (we just had the nicest extern from Texas A&M here and I am getting the hang of the Texas slang) were in your mommy's tummy. When an animal is born the umbilical cord needs to be severed. Right after the puppy or kitten is born the mother chews it off next to the puppy or kitten. In humans the doctor puts this funny little clip on it and then cuts it. It's really gross. When my first daughter was born the doctor looked over at me and said "it's all yours if you want to cut it off," at that point I passed out for the second time that night (the first time was when my daughter was born... I've never seen so much blood!). Thank God he didn't ask me to chew it off, you know how I feel about human flesh! I just have one question for all of you. When I was born and Arizona was still cooling off, the father to be was not allowed in the delivery room. Who was the first guy to change that tradition? He ought to be ashamed of himself.
Oh! As far the location, it is in the same place as yours, on their belly. They usually don't have "innies" or "outies," just "flatties" and they are covered by hair.
Dr. Jeff was so busy working on getting the roof finished on the barn that he didn’t have time to write the Litterbox this month, so I borrowed one from the archives. This was an oldie but goodie submitted by our niece, Ally, back in 2012. And now she’s grown up and off at college. How time flies!!
Dr. Susie
Okay, this is a totally and completely random dinner table question: Do cats, and dogs have bellybuttons? And if so, where are they located?
Thanks! Ally from Arizona
Dear Ally from AZ:
Did you know I used to live in Arizona? Man, was it hot! I hope it's cooled down some since I left. Back to your random dinner table question (I'll bet you're a teenager, old people don't use the word random). Anyway, yes, cats and dogs have belly buttons. It is actually called the umbilicus and is the place your and their umbilical cord attached when you all (we just had the nicest extern from Texas A&M here and I am getting the hang of the Texas slang) were in your mommy's tummy. When an animal is born the umbilical cord needs to be severed. Right after the puppy or kitten is born the mother chews it off next to the puppy or kitten. In humans the doctor puts this funny little clip on it and then cuts it. It's really gross. When my first daughter was born the doctor looked over at me and said "it's all yours if you want to cut it off," at that point I passed out for the second time that night (the first time was when my daughter was born... I've never seen so much blood!). Thank God he didn't ask me to chew it off, you know how I feel about human flesh! I just have one question for all of you. When I was born and Arizona was still cooling off, the father to be was not allowed in the delivery room. Who was the first guy to change that tradition? He ought to be ashamed of himself.
Oh! As far the location, it is in the same place as yours, on their belly. They usually don't have "innies" or "outies," just "flatties" and they are covered by hair.
Dr. Jeff was so busy working on getting the roof finished on the barn that he didn’t have time to write the Litterbox this month, so I borrowed one from the archives. This was an oldie but goodie submitted by our niece, Ally, back in 2012. And now she’s grown up and off at college. How time flies!!
Dr. Susie
Dear Dr. Jeff, March 2018
My family and I have been sick for the past several weeks with the flu. Do I need to worry about my dog catching the flu?
Steve in Reno
Dear Steve,
Great question. It is very unlikely your dog will catch the same flu you have. But if I’m not mistaken, back in 2009 when the swine flu (H1N1) was wreaking havoc among humans there were reported cases of dogs and cats contracting the disease from their owners. This year there is a canine influenza that is giving dogs across the nation a lot of grief. It is called canine influenza A H3N2. This virus was discovered in 2015. Back in 2004 there was an equine flu H3N8 that mutated to infect dogs and was very deadly. Many dogs died during that epidemic. There have been reported cases of H3N2 in both dogs and cats in every state except Hawaii (probably due to the fact of their strict animal importation laws and thousands of miles of water). Wait a minute…Note to president Trump: Scrap the wall… Giant, deep moat, probably cheaper and more eco-sensitive, plus waterfront properties and a place to retire bad FBI upper echelon staff wearing concrete slippers… Back to the K9 flu. Before you all rush to your keyboard asking me how to keep your furry family members safe, let me tell you the real deal. Good hygiene and staying away from places that increase your dog’s likelihood of infection is good prevention. That means no dog parks, Petsmart, Petco, groomers that don't sterilize their equipment, campgrounds, and border moats. Also, there is a new vaccine out that covers two strains, and if you have questions or think your dog needs to be vaccinated, call your vet.
Dr. Jeff
My family and I have been sick for the past several weeks with the flu. Do I need to worry about my dog catching the flu?
Steve in Reno
Dear Steve,
Great question. It is very unlikely your dog will catch the same flu you have. But if I’m not mistaken, back in 2009 when the swine flu (H1N1) was wreaking havoc among humans there were reported cases of dogs and cats contracting the disease from their owners. This year there is a canine influenza that is giving dogs across the nation a lot of grief. It is called canine influenza A H3N2. This virus was discovered in 2015. Back in 2004 there was an equine flu H3N8 that mutated to infect dogs and was very deadly. Many dogs died during that epidemic. There have been reported cases of H3N2 in both dogs and cats in every state except Hawaii (probably due to the fact of their strict animal importation laws and thousands of miles of water). Wait a minute…Note to president Trump: Scrap the wall… Giant, deep moat, probably cheaper and more eco-sensitive, plus waterfront properties and a place to retire bad FBI upper echelon staff wearing concrete slippers… Back to the K9 flu. Before you all rush to your keyboard asking me how to keep your furry family members safe, let me tell you the real deal. Good hygiene and staying away from places that increase your dog’s likelihood of infection is good prevention. That means no dog parks, Petsmart, Petco, groomers that don't sterilize their equipment, campgrounds, and border moats. Also, there is a new vaccine out that covers two strains, and if you have questions or think your dog needs to be vaccinated, call your vet.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff February 2018
What is the best gift I can give my dog for Valentine’s Day? I am single, and I like my dog more than I like any people I know. I feel like my dog is my soulmate, and want to get him something special. I guess what I’m asking is what can I do to make my dog love me more?
Pat in Las Vegas
Dear Pat,
You didn’t mention if you are a man or a woman, I got that your dog is a male, though. I’m a little concerned … I think this letter is a little weird, what with you not liking people and wanting your dog to love you more. But, I received other letters just like yours, so I guess the question begs to be answered. I’m going to answer it the best way I know how, with sarcasm and love…and honesty. Pat, you’re kind of creeping me out. Back when I was a kid there was a show called Saturday Night Live, and there was ‘Pat’. I don’t know if Pat was a male or female, and that was the gist of the skit. Nobody could ever figure it out, whether Pat was a man or a woman. So I’m not going to try to figure you out, but here’s the deal. I say this to everybody. If you want your dog to love you, and I mean the respectful, honest way, not the way I’m worried about, give him a high quality food, lots of attention and walks. Dogs love attention more than they like treats and all the other stuff you can buy them that they don’t need. You don’t have to take him to restaurants and bars with you, they get sleeping alone by themselves, they don’t need to be in your purse or pocket all day long. Boy, did I say pocket? Now I’m creeping myself out. Your dog is going to respect you because you’re a good person of upstanding character, a good citizen with a backbone, you’re not weak. I am a little worried about you, Pat, because you don’t have any friends and you like dogs more than people. I understand some people are like that because they feel they can trust dogs when they can’t trust some people, or have been hurt by people. Let’s face it, bad things happen to really good people and the people dogs like and respect the most are the ones who get up from being knocked down and keep on living full speed. It’s time to get back up on that horse, no pun intended, get back into civilization, meet some people- maybe dog people at the park. You might make some good friends, and you could have a dog-human Valentines get together…there are other people out there who love their dog as much as you love your dog. The thing to remember is not to get into a pissing match over whose dog is better. All dogs and people are different and just accept them as they are.
Dr. Jeff
What is the best gift I can give my dog for Valentine’s Day? I am single, and I like my dog more than I like any people I know. I feel like my dog is my soulmate, and want to get him something special. I guess what I’m asking is what can I do to make my dog love me more?
Pat in Las Vegas
Dear Pat,
You didn’t mention if you are a man or a woman, I got that your dog is a male, though. I’m a little concerned … I think this letter is a little weird, what with you not liking people and wanting your dog to love you more. But, I received other letters just like yours, so I guess the question begs to be answered. I’m going to answer it the best way I know how, with sarcasm and love…and honesty. Pat, you’re kind of creeping me out. Back when I was a kid there was a show called Saturday Night Live, and there was ‘Pat’. I don’t know if Pat was a male or female, and that was the gist of the skit. Nobody could ever figure it out, whether Pat was a man or a woman. So I’m not going to try to figure you out, but here’s the deal. I say this to everybody. If you want your dog to love you, and I mean the respectful, honest way, not the way I’m worried about, give him a high quality food, lots of attention and walks. Dogs love attention more than they like treats and all the other stuff you can buy them that they don’t need. You don’t have to take him to restaurants and bars with you, they get sleeping alone by themselves, they don’t need to be in your purse or pocket all day long. Boy, did I say pocket? Now I’m creeping myself out. Your dog is going to respect you because you’re a good person of upstanding character, a good citizen with a backbone, you’re not weak. I am a little worried about you, Pat, because you don’t have any friends and you like dogs more than people. I understand some people are like that because they feel they can trust dogs when they can’t trust some people, or have been hurt by people. Let’s face it, bad things happen to really good people and the people dogs like and respect the most are the ones who get up from being knocked down and keep on living full speed. It’s time to get back up on that horse, no pun intended, get back into civilization, meet some people- maybe dog people at the park. You might make some good friends, and you could have a dog-human Valentines get together…there are other people out there who love their dog as much as you love your dog. The thing to remember is not to get into a pissing match over whose dog is better. All dogs and people are different and just accept them as they are.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, January 2018
What sort of New Year's Resolution should a pet owner make?
Marilyn in Cedaredge
Marilyn- thanks for the great question. Did you know that only about 8% of the people who make New Year’s Resolutions(henceforth referred to as NYRs) actually keep them? Yep, only 8%. That’s a pretty low number but I think it is much higher than my NYR success rate. Yeah, I know its hard to believe that someone as perfect as muaa fails at anything. When I look at really successful people, they have lots of failures but the thing they do different than the average Joe is look back and analyze why they have failed, retool and keep on going. When I look back at why my NYRs failed (or other things) in my life there are a couple of problem points that stick out. Number 1 on the pop chart is a lack of real desire. The goal sounded neat and others really wanted me to do whatever it was, but I really didn’t give a hoot. It seemed like the first speed bump derailed me and I was done (unlike wanting to be a veterinarian in which all kinds of hurdles were put in my way and none were going to slow me down). Number 2, I did not make a plan. For instance, if I wanted to run a marathon that year I didn't formulate a plan that started with 2 mile runs the first couple of weeks and worked my way up. Let alone looking at my daily schedule and changing it to fit my new workout routine. Number 3 I didn't have anyone to hold me accountable. Studies have shown that when two or more people start an exercise routine they are 9 times more likely to succeed because of the fear of letting the other guy down. It is also better to have someone other than your spouse as an accountability partner. Spouses know how busy you are and are
more likely to understand why you are too tired to get up early and go exercise, meanwhile we don't want to let friends down. There are numbers 4, 5, and 6 and I don’t want to bore you with them, but I’m sure you get the idea. Back to the question. The 2 best NYRs a pet owner can make are to feed fewer treats and exercise their pet(s) more, by taking them on longer walks or playing, both of which result in weight loss and better behavior. Studies have shown that dogs who exercise more with their owners are better behaved and live longer. Studies have also shown that people who walk with their pets three times a week live
longer. I’m not sure about the better behaved part as far as the owner goes... So for both you and your pet to live longer and visit your Dr.'s less often, take Fluffy for more walks and lay off the milk bones and Snickers bars. I guess walking doesn't apply to cat owners, they live longer by just petting their kitty, or so say the studies...
Dr. Jeff
What sort of New Year's Resolution should a pet owner make?
Marilyn in Cedaredge
Marilyn- thanks for the great question. Did you know that only about 8% of the people who make New Year’s Resolutions(henceforth referred to as NYRs) actually keep them? Yep, only 8%. That’s a pretty low number but I think it is much higher than my NYR success rate. Yeah, I know its hard to believe that someone as perfect as muaa fails at anything. When I look at really successful people, they have lots of failures but the thing they do different than the average Joe is look back and analyze why they have failed, retool and keep on going. When I look back at why my NYRs failed (or other things) in my life there are a couple of problem points that stick out. Number 1 on the pop chart is a lack of real desire. The goal sounded neat and others really wanted me to do whatever it was, but I really didn’t give a hoot. It seemed like the first speed bump derailed me and I was done (unlike wanting to be a veterinarian in which all kinds of hurdles were put in my way and none were going to slow me down). Number 2, I did not make a plan. For instance, if I wanted to run a marathon that year I didn't formulate a plan that started with 2 mile runs the first couple of weeks and worked my way up. Let alone looking at my daily schedule and changing it to fit my new workout routine. Number 3 I didn't have anyone to hold me accountable. Studies have shown that when two or more people start an exercise routine they are 9 times more likely to succeed because of the fear of letting the other guy down. It is also better to have someone other than your spouse as an accountability partner. Spouses know how busy you are and are
more likely to understand why you are too tired to get up early and go exercise, meanwhile we don't want to let friends down. There are numbers 4, 5, and 6 and I don’t want to bore you with them, but I’m sure you get the idea. Back to the question. The 2 best NYRs a pet owner can make are to feed fewer treats and exercise their pet(s) more, by taking them on longer walks or playing, both of which result in weight loss and better behavior. Studies have shown that dogs who exercise more with their owners are better behaved and live longer. Studies have also shown that people who walk with their pets three times a week live
longer. I’m not sure about the better behaved part as far as the owner goes... So for both you and your pet to live longer and visit your Dr.'s less often, take Fluffy for more walks and lay off the milk bones and Snickers bars. I guess walking doesn't apply to cat owners, they live longer by just petting their kitty, or so say the studies...
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr Jeff: December 2017
Why do reindeer fly?
Sammy in Phoenix, 4 years old
Well now Sammy, what a great question! I’ve often excogitated the same question while in a state of insomnolence. It is during this time, coursing after the elusive zzz’s, that some of my sans pareil conclusions have arisen from the darkest place on earth… MY AZKABAN…my brain. Sound scary?? It’s really not, much like a celestial black hole which absorbs all particles and light, and when observed from earth appears to be an invisible void, but actually is very full of random shebang. (The late great Howard Cosell would have loved this intro). Sammy, there was an era not long ago in which sportscasters were great. The likes of Howard Cosell, Jimmy the Greek, and Keith Jackson would call it like it is. Not like today’s uneducated, washed up, has-been, mealy mouthed, politically correct ex-pros who think that because they could catch a football, shoot a basket or hit a home run, all while jacked up on “roids,” that we want to hear the slang dribble that flows from their overpaid clap traps. Sammy - there was a time when singers the likes of Dean Martin, Bing Crosby, Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr. (the self proclaimed “One-eyed-nigga-jew”) sang ballads of love and adventure, not cop killin’ and whitey’s oppression. Oh boy, where did that come from? I guess the electroshock-psycho therapy didn’t work, but man am I afraid of lightening now(don’t worry, I didn’t go to a professional, I found this video on youtube that involved someone you trust and a 110V outlet…)! Sorry Sammy, I digressed. Reindeer are the cutest little boogers aren't they? (Sorry to interrupt -I had to draw the line here. Dr. Jeff went into a descriptive rating system of texture and taste for nasal boogers that I thought was inappropriate -Dr Susie). Why do reindeer fly…hmm…I suppose its because taking the train or driving would be logistically impossible with all the mileage needed to be covered in one night. Flying seems to be the only option, but flying commercial wouldn’t work either with having to go thru security and all. Can you imagine Santa Claus, of all people, getting the “Blue Glove” treatment… Yikes!! Yeah, the reason reindeer fly is because… well I don't know. I guess it’s tradition. I do know the answer as to how they fly (ya know, I am a vet). MAGIC that’s how. So Sammy, I know I used some big words this month and you might have to have your mom and dad help you understand it all, but thanks for the question. Merry Christmas!
Dr. Jeff
PS Did I forget to mention that Dr. Susie wants to get reindeer? So maybe in a few years you can come visit them at the clinic. I’m pretty sure hers won’t have the flying magic though…
Why do reindeer fly?
Sammy in Phoenix, 4 years old
Well now Sammy, what a great question! I’ve often excogitated the same question while in a state of insomnolence. It is during this time, coursing after the elusive zzz’s, that some of my sans pareil conclusions have arisen from the darkest place on earth… MY AZKABAN…my brain. Sound scary?? It’s really not, much like a celestial black hole which absorbs all particles and light, and when observed from earth appears to be an invisible void, but actually is very full of random shebang. (The late great Howard Cosell would have loved this intro). Sammy, there was an era not long ago in which sportscasters were great. The likes of Howard Cosell, Jimmy the Greek, and Keith Jackson would call it like it is. Not like today’s uneducated, washed up, has-been, mealy mouthed, politically correct ex-pros who think that because they could catch a football, shoot a basket or hit a home run, all while jacked up on “roids,” that we want to hear the slang dribble that flows from their overpaid clap traps. Sammy - there was a time when singers the likes of Dean Martin, Bing Crosby, Frank Sinatra and Sammy Davis Jr. (the self proclaimed “One-eyed-nigga-jew”) sang ballads of love and adventure, not cop killin’ and whitey’s oppression. Oh boy, where did that come from? I guess the electroshock-psycho therapy didn’t work, but man am I afraid of lightening now(don’t worry, I didn’t go to a professional, I found this video on youtube that involved someone you trust and a 110V outlet…)! Sorry Sammy, I digressed. Reindeer are the cutest little boogers aren't they? (Sorry to interrupt -I had to draw the line here. Dr. Jeff went into a descriptive rating system of texture and taste for nasal boogers that I thought was inappropriate -Dr Susie). Why do reindeer fly…hmm…I suppose its because taking the train or driving would be logistically impossible with all the mileage needed to be covered in one night. Flying seems to be the only option, but flying commercial wouldn’t work either with having to go thru security and all. Can you imagine Santa Claus, of all people, getting the “Blue Glove” treatment… Yikes!! Yeah, the reason reindeer fly is because… well I don't know. I guess it’s tradition. I do know the answer as to how they fly (ya know, I am a vet). MAGIC that’s how. So Sammy, I know I used some big words this month and you might have to have your mom and dad help you understand it all, but thanks for the question. Merry Christmas!
Dr. Jeff
PS Did I forget to mention that Dr. Susie wants to get reindeer? So maybe in a few years you can come visit them at the clinic. I’m pretty sure hers won’t have the flying magic though…
Dear Dr. Jeff: November 2017
My neighbors, Bill and Kathy, treat their dog like it is a human being. It sleeps in bed with them. They take it everywhere they go. They bring to bridge club every thursday morning. Everywhere!! Its an annoying little yapper. Believe it or not, I have talked to them about it and guess whose name came up for a second opinion. Can you help us with this dilemma with out your political carrying on?
Janet in Las Vegas
PS I loved Dr. Susie’s ps in last months litterbox.
Dear Janet:
Screw you and Dr Susie, and who the hell do you think you are giving me grief about the litter box and my “political carrying on,” its called the litter box because its full of shit. Get It!! My God!
Whew, now that I got that off my chest lets get on to your great question. I’ve had variations of this question over the years and never really wanted or desired to answer them, until you touched a nerve. (I hope your happy). Many people, especially empty nesters who play bridge every thursday morning have pets they treat as their children. Many I have talked to like them better than their grown up children. They don’t talk back, they don't date and marry the biker next door, they don't ask for money that they will pay back but never really pay back, they don't make you feel ashamed when your nosy bridge partner is bragging about her doctor son in law, they are not in drug rehab for the 5th time, they just give you unconditional love and affection. I get why people treat their pets as their children. But here is where we go wrong. Do you remember a couple of litterboxes ago when I talked about how we messed up our kids because the boomer generation was brought up by the greatest generation…… well guess what? I'll bet your neighbors and you are boomers. Now your thinking, “How does he know?” Its simple, only a boomer would play bridge on thursday mornings. My guess is you play bridge every other morning of the week without Bill, Kathy and the little yapper with all the same partners and you haven't told them. But they know it, and are in a different bridge group that’s not loaded with snobs like you. Sorry, Im having a hard time keeping it together this morning. Many boomers were raised by parents who were never going to let them live the horrors of WWII or the depression and were raised as the center of the family, not part of the family. Thus we raise our kids like our parents raised us except there is a disconnect. If I’m the center of the family as a parent, how can I raised my child as the center of the family. There can only be one center. Have you ever been to a function for adults and someone has brought their children. Are you getting it. In family centered parenting there is a time and place for children. In child centered parenting the child is always present because he/she is the center of the universe and if I’m the center of the universe then I don't give a crap about you. Its all about me and my child, who I cant leave back at home because he has separation anxiety.
Its ok for people to treat their pets as family members but in a family centered environment not a child centered family. I get it. Every time we lose a pet my wife and kids cry and we grieve because our pets are part of our family. But we are part of a larger community and understand there is a time and place for everything, including, children and pets. And, we understand that society functions better when we are polite and considerate of others versus selfish and self centered.
Dr Jeff
My neighbors, Bill and Kathy, treat their dog like it is a human being. It sleeps in bed with them. They take it everywhere they go. They bring to bridge club every thursday morning. Everywhere!! Its an annoying little yapper. Believe it or not, I have talked to them about it and guess whose name came up for a second opinion. Can you help us with this dilemma with out your political carrying on?
Janet in Las Vegas
PS I loved Dr. Susie’s ps in last months litterbox.
Dear Janet:
Screw you and Dr Susie, and who the hell do you think you are giving me grief about the litter box and my “political carrying on,” its called the litter box because its full of shit. Get It!! My God!
Whew, now that I got that off my chest lets get on to your great question. I’ve had variations of this question over the years and never really wanted or desired to answer them, until you touched a nerve. (I hope your happy). Many people, especially empty nesters who play bridge every thursday morning have pets they treat as their children. Many I have talked to like them better than their grown up children. They don’t talk back, they don't date and marry the biker next door, they don't ask for money that they will pay back but never really pay back, they don't make you feel ashamed when your nosy bridge partner is bragging about her doctor son in law, they are not in drug rehab for the 5th time, they just give you unconditional love and affection. I get why people treat their pets as their children. But here is where we go wrong. Do you remember a couple of litterboxes ago when I talked about how we messed up our kids because the boomer generation was brought up by the greatest generation…… well guess what? I'll bet your neighbors and you are boomers. Now your thinking, “How does he know?” Its simple, only a boomer would play bridge on thursday mornings. My guess is you play bridge every other morning of the week without Bill, Kathy and the little yapper with all the same partners and you haven't told them. But they know it, and are in a different bridge group that’s not loaded with snobs like you. Sorry, Im having a hard time keeping it together this morning. Many boomers were raised by parents who were never going to let them live the horrors of WWII or the depression and were raised as the center of the family, not part of the family. Thus we raise our kids like our parents raised us except there is a disconnect. If I’m the center of the family as a parent, how can I raised my child as the center of the family. There can only be one center. Have you ever been to a function for adults and someone has brought their children. Are you getting it. In family centered parenting there is a time and place for children. In child centered parenting the child is always present because he/she is the center of the universe and if I’m the center of the universe then I don't give a crap about you. Its all about me and my child, who I cant leave back at home because he has separation anxiety.
Its ok for people to treat their pets as family members but in a family centered environment not a child centered family. I get it. Every time we lose a pet my wife and kids cry and we grieve because our pets are part of our family. But we are part of a larger community and understand there is a time and place for everything, including, children and pets. And, we understand that society functions better when we are polite and considerate of others versus selfish and self centered.
Dr Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, October 2017
Why are calico cats usually female while other species of animal can have 3 different colors and be male or female?
Dr. Susie
Dear Dr. Susie,
This was something we learned in freshman vet school genetics. Where were you that day? Oh! That’s right you were daydreaming about that incredibly hunky guy who sat in the back. Yeah, the guy with the stunning good looks and a bod women would kill for. Don't worry, you weren't the only girl who was distracted. I’m sure the class GPA would have been higher if it weren't for my presence. So anyway, I’ll give you a little refresher. In cats, color is transmitted on the female gender chromosome X. Females have 2 X chromosomes and males have one X with a Y. Stick with me, here is where it gets tricky. The X chromosome transmits all color except white. White fur is the only color not transmitted on a sex gene or chromosome. It is due to a phenomena called piebalding (don’t ask me to go into that). Sooooo..... if a female cat has 2 X chromosomes she potentially could have 2 colors.. For Example if a female gets an orange X chromosome from her mother and and orange from her dad she will be orange. But if she gets an orange X from her mother and a black X from her dad, she will be orange and black (aka tortoiseshell). If this same kitty also has the pie balding gene turned on she will be a calico (black, orange and white). As you can guess, if a male is XY he can only have one color that could be solids or different tints of the same color like a tabby. Now, there is a chance (about 1 in 3000) that a male could be a calico, but will be sterile because he is an XXY. In humans this is called Klinefelter Syndrome. So why do other species with 3 colors have both male and female? Simple, my dear, color is not transmitted on the sex chromosomes in most species. Thus, making the cat more special.
Dr. Jeff
P.S. Dr. Jeff
You are definitely right about one thing: your presence did lower the class GPA.... but not because of your hotness. Your GPA was the problem.
Love Ya!
Dr S.
Why are calico cats usually female while other species of animal can have 3 different colors and be male or female?
Dr. Susie
Dear Dr. Susie,
This was something we learned in freshman vet school genetics. Where were you that day? Oh! That’s right you were daydreaming about that incredibly hunky guy who sat in the back. Yeah, the guy with the stunning good looks and a bod women would kill for. Don't worry, you weren't the only girl who was distracted. I’m sure the class GPA would have been higher if it weren't for my presence. So anyway, I’ll give you a little refresher. In cats, color is transmitted on the female gender chromosome X. Females have 2 X chromosomes and males have one X with a Y. Stick with me, here is where it gets tricky. The X chromosome transmits all color except white. White fur is the only color not transmitted on a sex gene or chromosome. It is due to a phenomena called piebalding (don’t ask me to go into that). Sooooo..... if a female cat has 2 X chromosomes she potentially could have 2 colors.. For Example if a female gets an orange X chromosome from her mother and and orange from her dad she will be orange. But if she gets an orange X from her mother and a black X from her dad, she will be orange and black (aka tortoiseshell). If this same kitty also has the pie balding gene turned on she will be a calico (black, orange and white). As you can guess, if a male is XY he can only have one color that could be solids or different tints of the same color like a tabby. Now, there is a chance (about 1 in 3000) that a male could be a calico, but will be sterile because he is an XXY. In humans this is called Klinefelter Syndrome. So why do other species with 3 colors have both male and female? Simple, my dear, color is not transmitted on the sex chromosomes in most species. Thus, making the cat more special.
Dr. Jeff
P.S. Dr. Jeff
You are definitely right about one thing: your presence did lower the class GPA.... but not because of your hotness. Your GPA was the problem.
Love Ya!
Dr S.
Dear Dr. Jeff, September 2017
I have an old Springer spaniel, named Bubba, that I have hunted with since he was a pup. He is 14 years old and showing his age. He is really slowing down and can’t hunt anymore. I’ve thought about having him cloned. What is your opinion on cloning dogs?
Jim in Dallas
Dear Jim,
Thanks for the great question. Believe it or not, I have been asked this question many times during my esteemed career. I have also taken many tissue samples to be banked for the time when canine cloning was perfected. You are not too far from one of the leading institutions on cloning of animals, Texas A&M. One of the tissue banks for saving tissue samples was called “Canine Savings and Clone.” I swear this is true. Even I could not come up with a name like this, although secretly I wish I had. Do you really want my opinion? Well lets open Pandora’s little box. But first I gotta ask, “Why would you name your dog after your big sister?” Just kidding. It’s a Colorado thing. Cloning will not get your dog back after he dies. Its important to remember that who we are is half genetic and half the environment we were raised in up until this moment in time. So unless you can time travel and take the cloned Bubba back in time 14 years and mimic the exact upbringing, you will have a dog with the same genetics but different personality. Whoa, stop. That would not work either because Bubba would be 14 and old when you got the sample today. Dang it all (how’s that for my Texas slang)! Do I sound like Hilary trying to put on a southern drawl while stumping in the south? Or maybe I sound like George Bush all the time. Yuck! I hate politicians. When is someone going to invent some machine that can really detect what a person’s core is. Then maybe we can find someone to run our country who really has it’s best interest in mind not their hunger for power or money. The jury is still out on President Trump, but as far as Mitch McConnell, Paul Ryan, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer…dirty, rotten, no-good scumbags. Maybe there is a way to pseudo clone those 4 so they come back as the slimy salamanders they are. Thanks to Dr. Susie this has been edited for the fragile ears of my awesome audience. So Jim, cloning may sound like a good idea, especially if you have a great dog like Bubba, but the outcome will be different. So get another Springer, and just raise and love him for who he is.
Dr J.
p.s. I was just kidding about your sister.
I have an old Springer spaniel, named Bubba, that I have hunted with since he was a pup. He is 14 years old and showing his age. He is really slowing down and can’t hunt anymore. I’ve thought about having him cloned. What is your opinion on cloning dogs?
Jim in Dallas
Dear Jim,
Thanks for the great question. Believe it or not, I have been asked this question many times during my esteemed career. I have also taken many tissue samples to be banked for the time when canine cloning was perfected. You are not too far from one of the leading institutions on cloning of animals, Texas A&M. One of the tissue banks for saving tissue samples was called “Canine Savings and Clone.” I swear this is true. Even I could not come up with a name like this, although secretly I wish I had. Do you really want my opinion? Well lets open Pandora’s little box. But first I gotta ask, “Why would you name your dog after your big sister?” Just kidding. It’s a Colorado thing. Cloning will not get your dog back after he dies. Its important to remember that who we are is half genetic and half the environment we were raised in up until this moment in time. So unless you can time travel and take the cloned Bubba back in time 14 years and mimic the exact upbringing, you will have a dog with the same genetics but different personality. Whoa, stop. That would not work either because Bubba would be 14 and old when you got the sample today. Dang it all (how’s that for my Texas slang)! Do I sound like Hilary trying to put on a southern drawl while stumping in the south? Or maybe I sound like George Bush all the time. Yuck! I hate politicians. When is someone going to invent some machine that can really detect what a person’s core is. Then maybe we can find someone to run our country who really has it’s best interest in mind not their hunger for power or money. The jury is still out on President Trump, but as far as Mitch McConnell, Paul Ryan, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer…dirty, rotten, no-good scumbags. Maybe there is a way to pseudo clone those 4 so they come back as the slimy salamanders they are. Thanks to Dr. Susie this has been edited for the fragile ears of my awesome audience. So Jim, cloning may sound like a good idea, especially if you have a great dog like Bubba, but the outcome will be different. So get another Springer, and just raise and love him for who he is.
Dr J.
p.s. I was just kidding about your sister.
August 2017
Dear Dr Jeff,
Last week I went to the dog park in Delta. Despite poop bags being available, feces were everywhere. What’s with that? I take my dog to another vet so I understand if you don't want to answer my question.
Stephanie in Delta
Dear Stephanie,
It’s the way the world is going. People are becoming less considerate and more self-centered. The other day I pulled in behind a gentleman pulling into the gas station. Instead of pulling all the way forward to the front pump he stopped at the closest pump and started filling. What an jerk! Call it self-centered, inconsiderate, or whatever. As much as I would like to blame the millennial generation, they are not the only ones who are inconsiderate. That guy filling his car with gas was older than me. I blame the greatest generation for this self-centered, ‘it’s all about me’ attitude. Here is my theory: When the greatest generation came home from WWII, either consciously or subconsciously they told themselves their children would never suffer the evils they did. They switched the way their children (the boomer gen) were raised. Instead of the old way of raising children in a family-centered home, in which the children were part of the family and contributed to the family, they raised kids to be the center of the family. They were held any time they cried, they were held until they fell asleep, these kids never learned to do anything on their own from the time they were born. They were the center of their world. Pre- WWII kids were put to bed and cried themselves to sleep while mom and dad worked in the field until dark. These kids learned to be self-sufficient. There are several really good books on this topic. I wish I were smart enough to come up with this on my own. In the 50’s and 60’s when the boomer generation became of age to have a family of their own, an internal conflict occurred. Mom and dad both didn't know how to raise a child as the center of the family because they were taught by their parents that they were the center of the universe. See the conflict? So this creepy dude named Dr. Spock (a failed psychologist) wrote a book that taught mom and dad how they can maintain their self-centered universe, while maintaining a child-centered family. It’s called the baby sitter. Mom and dad could lead their self-centered life while letting junior be the center of the baby sitter’s world. And so here we are with 3 generations of people who are entitled, inconsiderate and never learned to work for themselves because every thing has been given to them. The perfect set-up for a Utopian society in which the government takes care of us all. Bleck. So, do what I do. Make it a little painful for someone to be inconsiderate. When you open a door for someone and they don't say thank you, say “you’re welcome” for the whole world to hear. Don't frequent businesses that don't have polite employees. If it doesn't seem like you're appreciated by a vet or his staff, quit going there and come to the best veterinary clinic in the west.
Take a stand. Quit putting up with mediocrity.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr Jeff,
Last week I went to the dog park in Delta. Despite poop bags being available, feces were everywhere. What’s with that? I take my dog to another vet so I understand if you don't want to answer my question.
Stephanie in Delta
Dear Stephanie,
It’s the way the world is going. People are becoming less considerate and more self-centered. The other day I pulled in behind a gentleman pulling into the gas station. Instead of pulling all the way forward to the front pump he stopped at the closest pump and started filling. What an jerk! Call it self-centered, inconsiderate, or whatever. As much as I would like to blame the millennial generation, they are not the only ones who are inconsiderate. That guy filling his car with gas was older than me. I blame the greatest generation for this self-centered, ‘it’s all about me’ attitude. Here is my theory: When the greatest generation came home from WWII, either consciously or subconsciously they told themselves their children would never suffer the evils they did. They switched the way their children (the boomer gen) were raised. Instead of the old way of raising children in a family-centered home, in which the children were part of the family and contributed to the family, they raised kids to be the center of the family. They were held any time they cried, they were held until they fell asleep, these kids never learned to do anything on their own from the time they were born. They were the center of their world. Pre- WWII kids were put to bed and cried themselves to sleep while mom and dad worked in the field until dark. These kids learned to be self-sufficient. There are several really good books on this topic. I wish I were smart enough to come up with this on my own. In the 50’s and 60’s when the boomer generation became of age to have a family of their own, an internal conflict occurred. Mom and dad both didn't know how to raise a child as the center of the family because they were taught by their parents that they were the center of the universe. See the conflict? So this creepy dude named Dr. Spock (a failed psychologist) wrote a book that taught mom and dad how they can maintain their self-centered universe, while maintaining a child-centered family. It’s called the baby sitter. Mom and dad could lead their self-centered life while letting junior be the center of the baby sitter’s world. And so here we are with 3 generations of people who are entitled, inconsiderate and never learned to work for themselves because every thing has been given to them. The perfect set-up for a Utopian society in which the government takes care of us all. Bleck. So, do what I do. Make it a little painful for someone to be inconsiderate. When you open a door for someone and they don't say thank you, say “you’re welcome” for the whole world to hear. Don't frequent businesses that don't have polite employees. If it doesn't seem like you're appreciated by a vet or his staff, quit going there and come to the best veterinary clinic in the west.
Take a stand. Quit putting up with mediocrity.
Dr. Jeff
July 2017
So I'm still out working on the barn, and felt this was a perfect time to revisit a Litterbox from November of 2015. Dr. Jeff Here goes:
This is a story of how a young boy and his family have left a permanent impression on me (I hope for the better, although some of you may disagree). So anyway, it started when we moved here back in in 2009 (April 1st, I guess the joke's been on me ever since). I heard about a boy in my daughter's preschool class being diagnosed with a brain tumor. I thought to myself, wow, that's sad, but that's about as far as I would let my emotions go. Time ticked on and I didn't think much about what this family was going through. I am sure it is some sort of mental defense mechanism to keep the marginally sane from going crazy out here in God's country. Then I was reminded of this family when Kindergarten started. Two or three times a week during school pick up I would see a man or woman with a little boy in a wheelchair whose body was weak from cancer and chemotherapy. Sometimes they would be gone for weeks at a time, and I would wonder what happened. It was almost a relief when they were not there. I felt vulnerable and scared when I saw them. Could that be me someday with one of my kids, Winnie or Tori or Alex or Gus? I could not even think about it. Avoidance is the best mental defense, right? Back to the story. We manage to get through Kindergarten and then first grade is upon us. The boy is back, but not the same parents. The man (the one who made the biggest impression on me) who looks like he has not slept, shaved or bathed for weeks now brings the boy. Maybe there is a woman, but I don't see her. I remember asking Susie why God would do this, and are our kids going to be next? The smartest person I know did not have an answer I could believe in. This young child's name is Wyatt Tietz. When I saw them at school, I could see the cancer going through his parents, Dan and Heather, as well. Wyatt died in early December of 2011. What's the point, you may ask. Numero uno, I sincerely hope none of you, or me, ever have to go through something like this. Number two, Heather and Dan run the Wyatt Tietz Foundation. This is a foundation in which 100% of the funds raised go to help families of children diagnosed with cancer get to the front range to the hospitals so their children can receive treatment. Number three, if you have a heart that this story has touched, it's time to get out your checkbook and write a check, put it in an envelope, and mail it to The Wyatt Tietz Foundation, 12575 2190 Rd, Eckert, CO 81418. You can also give online at their website. Also, the Wyatt Tietz Memorial Golf Tournament is on August 5th this year. You can get a foursome signed up, play a round of golf on our beautiful Cedaredge course, AND donate to the best cause on the western slope. Let's all work together to help families in our county get their children with cancer the care they need. Thank you again.
So I'm still out working on the barn, and felt this was a perfect time to revisit a Litterbox from November of 2015. Dr. Jeff Here goes:
This is a story of how a young boy and his family have left a permanent impression on me (I hope for the better, although some of you may disagree). So anyway, it started when we moved here back in in 2009 (April 1st, I guess the joke's been on me ever since). I heard about a boy in my daughter's preschool class being diagnosed with a brain tumor. I thought to myself, wow, that's sad, but that's about as far as I would let my emotions go. Time ticked on and I didn't think much about what this family was going through. I am sure it is some sort of mental defense mechanism to keep the marginally sane from going crazy out here in God's country. Then I was reminded of this family when Kindergarten started. Two or three times a week during school pick up I would see a man or woman with a little boy in a wheelchair whose body was weak from cancer and chemotherapy. Sometimes they would be gone for weeks at a time, and I would wonder what happened. It was almost a relief when they were not there. I felt vulnerable and scared when I saw them. Could that be me someday with one of my kids, Winnie or Tori or Alex or Gus? I could not even think about it. Avoidance is the best mental defense, right? Back to the story. We manage to get through Kindergarten and then first grade is upon us. The boy is back, but not the same parents. The man (the one who made the biggest impression on me) who looks like he has not slept, shaved or bathed for weeks now brings the boy. Maybe there is a woman, but I don't see her. I remember asking Susie why God would do this, and are our kids going to be next? The smartest person I know did not have an answer I could believe in. This young child's name is Wyatt Tietz. When I saw them at school, I could see the cancer going through his parents, Dan and Heather, as well. Wyatt died in early December of 2011. What's the point, you may ask. Numero uno, I sincerely hope none of you, or me, ever have to go through something like this. Number two, Heather and Dan run the Wyatt Tietz Foundation. This is a foundation in which 100% of the funds raised go to help families of children diagnosed with cancer get to the front range to the hospitals so their children can receive treatment. Number three, if you have a heart that this story has touched, it's time to get out your checkbook and write a check, put it in an envelope, and mail it to The Wyatt Tietz Foundation, 12575 2190 Rd, Eckert, CO 81418. You can also give online at their website. Also, the Wyatt Tietz Memorial Golf Tournament is on August 5th this year. You can get a foursome signed up, play a round of golf on our beautiful Cedaredge course, AND donate to the best cause on the western slope. Let's all work together to help families in our county get their children with cancer the care they need. Thank you again.
June 2017
So, this month Dr. Jeff has been super busy working both inside and outside of the clinic. If you’ve been by lately, you’ve probably noticed all the commotion and dirt and rocks out back. That big mess is where our new barn/cattle pens and chute will be. Since Dr. Jeff is working hard out there, I thought I’d give him a break and write the Litterbox for this month. So you can blame the late newsletter on me, Dr. Susie, because it took me awhile to prepare this. Sorry to disappoint you Litterbox fans who turned this over right away to hear what crazy things that Dr. Jeff had to write this month about who knows what, but you’re stuck with me. I promise to do my best.
I wouldn’t dare try to answer one of the questions, but instead share a peek inside our clinic and lives, a perspective you may not often see or even realize existed. This was brought home to me by a few incidents recently that stand out. We have a nice lady, Nikole James, who helps us with our social media stuff. A few weeks ago she was in and a couple funny things happened. All our SCVC team was in the back of the clinic and Nikole was up front doing computer things by herself. One of you came in the door bearing a gift. I guess not what other people might consider a gift… but something we get fairly often, a poop sample. Evidently, the specimen was attempted to be handed over, but Nikole quickly said, “Just leave it on the counter, please!” Mind you, it wasn’t fresh and smelly and just plopped up there, it was actually wrapped in a couple of layers of cellophane. When Annie went back up to the front, Nikole’s eyes were as big as a bush baby’s, and she pointed to the sample. It was comical, on our end, and she was completely appalled that this happened on a regular basis. Nikole and Annie came back to the treatment area (Annie carrying the sample), where a big container with a suspicious shape was sitting on the floor. “What is that?” was Nikole’s next innocent question. It was a semen shipping container that frozen straws of cattle semen had arrived in the day before. That took a little explaining as well! By now we were all laughing and Nikole wondered why we never thought we had anything fun to share on Facebook. I told her that all this is pretty normal, and we thought we should have something really good before we put it out for the world to see. Her reply? “Nothing you guys do is normal!” So I guess we take for granted the routine things we do and don’t think any of you would be interested in them. And maybe you wouldn’t, just surprised by them… or grossed out. Which brings me to my second story. Dr. Jeff and I and the kids were having dinner with some friends of ours, and talking about our day. Some of you might know the Furubotten family. Anyway, Matt had just finished telling us about his day and asked me, “Susie, how was your day?” I replied that it was great and I had gotten to do a cow surgery (which I always enjoy) and that it was an eye removal. His eyes got huge and it took him a minute to come up with a reply. For those of you who know Matt, he is rarely at a loss for words. I soon realized this is not routine dinner conversation for normal people, and we moved on to another subject. And the third incident, again involving cows: My youngest daughter, Alex, came along on a cow call which turned into a C-section. She had my phone and took some pictures and video, which we put on Facebook. Later that day, one of my good friends from high school posted a comment regarding the puddle under the cow’s incision, “Is that blood?!?” For those of you who haven’t been around cows giving birth or having any type of surgery, there is a ton of blood. Keep in mind, they are 1000-1500 pound animals, and it takes a lot of blood to keep that body supplied with oxygen and nutrients. About 40 liters to be more precise. A cow could easily lose a pint or two of blood during a surgery and not blink an eye or swish a tail. No big deal. But I guess if you don’t see this on a regular basis, it probably is a big deal. So my reply to her comment? “Most my days involve blood.” And poop, and you probably don’t want to know what else…
So, this month Dr. Jeff has been super busy working both inside and outside of the clinic. If you’ve been by lately, you’ve probably noticed all the commotion and dirt and rocks out back. That big mess is where our new barn/cattle pens and chute will be. Since Dr. Jeff is working hard out there, I thought I’d give him a break and write the Litterbox for this month. So you can blame the late newsletter on me, Dr. Susie, because it took me awhile to prepare this. Sorry to disappoint you Litterbox fans who turned this over right away to hear what crazy things that Dr. Jeff had to write this month about who knows what, but you’re stuck with me. I promise to do my best.
I wouldn’t dare try to answer one of the questions, but instead share a peek inside our clinic and lives, a perspective you may not often see or even realize existed. This was brought home to me by a few incidents recently that stand out. We have a nice lady, Nikole James, who helps us with our social media stuff. A few weeks ago she was in and a couple funny things happened. All our SCVC team was in the back of the clinic and Nikole was up front doing computer things by herself. One of you came in the door bearing a gift. I guess not what other people might consider a gift… but something we get fairly often, a poop sample. Evidently, the specimen was attempted to be handed over, but Nikole quickly said, “Just leave it on the counter, please!” Mind you, it wasn’t fresh and smelly and just plopped up there, it was actually wrapped in a couple of layers of cellophane. When Annie went back up to the front, Nikole’s eyes were as big as a bush baby’s, and she pointed to the sample. It was comical, on our end, and she was completely appalled that this happened on a regular basis. Nikole and Annie came back to the treatment area (Annie carrying the sample), where a big container with a suspicious shape was sitting on the floor. “What is that?” was Nikole’s next innocent question. It was a semen shipping container that frozen straws of cattle semen had arrived in the day before. That took a little explaining as well! By now we were all laughing and Nikole wondered why we never thought we had anything fun to share on Facebook. I told her that all this is pretty normal, and we thought we should have something really good before we put it out for the world to see. Her reply? “Nothing you guys do is normal!” So I guess we take for granted the routine things we do and don’t think any of you would be interested in them. And maybe you wouldn’t, just surprised by them… or grossed out. Which brings me to my second story. Dr. Jeff and I and the kids were having dinner with some friends of ours, and talking about our day. Some of you might know the Furubotten family. Anyway, Matt had just finished telling us about his day and asked me, “Susie, how was your day?” I replied that it was great and I had gotten to do a cow surgery (which I always enjoy) and that it was an eye removal. His eyes got huge and it took him a minute to come up with a reply. For those of you who know Matt, he is rarely at a loss for words. I soon realized this is not routine dinner conversation for normal people, and we moved on to another subject. And the third incident, again involving cows: My youngest daughter, Alex, came along on a cow call which turned into a C-section. She had my phone and took some pictures and video, which we put on Facebook. Later that day, one of my good friends from high school posted a comment regarding the puddle under the cow’s incision, “Is that blood?!?” For those of you who haven’t been around cows giving birth or having any type of surgery, there is a ton of blood. Keep in mind, they are 1000-1500 pound animals, and it takes a lot of blood to keep that body supplied with oxygen and nutrients. About 40 liters to be more precise. A cow could easily lose a pint or two of blood during a surgery and not blink an eye or swish a tail. No big deal. But I guess if you don’t see this on a regular basis, it probably is a big deal. So my reply to her comment? “Most my days involve blood.” And poop, and you probably don’t want to know what else…
May 2017
Dear Dr. Jeff,
Thanks for the Facebook Video of your great bee release. I know you know a lot about the birds and the bees (you’ve referenced that in other Litterboxes) but in the video you were not sure about the sexes of the bees and all that fun stuff. Have you found any more info or is that private?
Helen in Cedaredge
Dear Helen,
This question sounds like a set up, but I have to run with it. As you have alluded to, not only do I know about the birds and the bees but I’m a personal expert. Just ask Dr Susie. Hubba hubba, or as Ritchie Cunningham in Happy Days used to say, “Yousier!” Just to set matters straight it was not a release but a “re-homing.” Since that epic video was released (not re-homed) I’ve spent some time studying bees. As it turns out there are three types of bees in the hive. First lets talk about the queen. There is only one queen per hive and she is a she, not some Las Vegas drag queen using a confused gender identity to leer at little girls in the women's restroom. (Remember, send the hate mail to the North Pole. I’m sure Mrs. Claus would really like to hear from you.) So, back to the queen… her job is to make baby bees, either drones or worker bees. She is kind of like Dr. Susie, she has lots of kids, actually only four. If Dr. Susie (the queen of my hive) were a bee she would have produced 3 worker bees (Winnie, Tori and Alex) and 1 drone (Gus). If you haven't figured it out yet, the worker bees are female. They are named worker bees because the do all the work around the hive, i.e. collect pollen and nectar, keep the hive clean, build comb and produce honey for the winter. They do it all, unlike the drone who is male. His only job is to mate with queen bees, whether his own or any other queen that just might be flying by. Now that’s a job I could really excel at. Interestingly, female bees come from fertilized eggs which makes them diploid while drones come from unfertilized eggs making them haploid. Thats geneticist talk for a single or double set of genes. I really want to make some little boy remark about Levis or Wranglers, but I certainly wouldn't want to offend someone with a snarky comment. Five days after that video was shot, I went back into the hive to check on her Royal Highness, the Queen, and to make sure she had chewed her way through the candy plug. Low and behold just like the book said, she had. Chalk one up for mother nature. Its been cold the first 2 weeks after the re-homing and I’m worried that the bees are spending all their energy staying warm and not foraging for pollen and nectar. I hope they survive this spring cold spell. Where’s global warming when I need it?
Dr J
Dear Dr. Jeff,
Thanks for the Facebook Video of your great bee release. I know you know a lot about the birds and the bees (you’ve referenced that in other Litterboxes) but in the video you were not sure about the sexes of the bees and all that fun stuff. Have you found any more info or is that private?
Helen in Cedaredge
Dear Helen,
This question sounds like a set up, but I have to run with it. As you have alluded to, not only do I know about the birds and the bees but I’m a personal expert. Just ask Dr Susie. Hubba hubba, or as Ritchie Cunningham in Happy Days used to say, “Yousier!” Just to set matters straight it was not a release but a “re-homing.” Since that epic video was released (not re-homed) I’ve spent some time studying bees. As it turns out there are three types of bees in the hive. First lets talk about the queen. There is only one queen per hive and she is a she, not some Las Vegas drag queen using a confused gender identity to leer at little girls in the women's restroom. (Remember, send the hate mail to the North Pole. I’m sure Mrs. Claus would really like to hear from you.) So, back to the queen… her job is to make baby bees, either drones or worker bees. She is kind of like Dr. Susie, she has lots of kids, actually only four. If Dr. Susie (the queen of my hive) were a bee she would have produced 3 worker bees (Winnie, Tori and Alex) and 1 drone (Gus). If you haven't figured it out yet, the worker bees are female. They are named worker bees because the do all the work around the hive, i.e. collect pollen and nectar, keep the hive clean, build comb and produce honey for the winter. They do it all, unlike the drone who is male. His only job is to mate with queen bees, whether his own or any other queen that just might be flying by. Now that’s a job I could really excel at. Interestingly, female bees come from fertilized eggs which makes them diploid while drones come from unfertilized eggs making them haploid. Thats geneticist talk for a single or double set of genes. I really want to make some little boy remark about Levis or Wranglers, but I certainly wouldn't want to offend someone with a snarky comment. Five days after that video was shot, I went back into the hive to check on her Royal Highness, the Queen, and to make sure she had chewed her way through the candy plug. Low and behold just like the book said, she had. Chalk one up for mother nature. Its been cold the first 2 weeks after the re-homing and I’m worried that the bees are spending all their energy staying warm and not foraging for pollen and nectar. I hope they survive this spring cold spell. Where’s global warming when I need it?
Dr J
April 2017
Dear Dr. Jeff
Why do dogs eat other animals sh@#? I can't keep my dog out of the litter box and whenever we go on hikes he's eating every bit of poop he can find.
Mike in Arvada
Dear Mike:
I think this is the first question from someone in Arvada. Where the heck is Arvada, sounds like it must be on the Mexican border. What do you think of that wall idea in your back yard? My old mentor Dr. Ambrose(who lived in Phoenix) came up with a plan he called the 50/50 rule. Build a wall 50 feet high, mount a 50 caliber gun every 50 yards. If any body comes with in 50 yards of the wall shoot them. I, myself, think this is a little extreme but I do like the idea of being able to control who comes into the best country in the world. Anyway back to the topic of “coprophagy,” which means crap-eater. To quote Bill Clinton when asked why he risked the scandalous affair with Monica L., “I did it because I could.” Mike, your dog eats caca because he can, and because it tastes good. Have your ever tried the sh@% sampler in your backyard? As many have told me: “Don’t knock it till you've tried it.” Really, there are all different theories out there as to why dogs eat poop. My theory on cat poop is simple. Cat food has so much protein and fat that does not get absorbed and is crapped out that it truly is a dog treat. There are a lot of reasons you can look up on the web like under-feeding, parasites, endocrine disorders etc, etc. Which may or may not be true. I have thousands of patients (although I really have no patience) who are completely healthy and love the taste of butt candy. So I guess our good buddy Bill was right. Dogs eat poop because they can. And maybe because they like it.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff
Why do dogs eat other animals sh@#? I can't keep my dog out of the litter box and whenever we go on hikes he's eating every bit of poop he can find.
Mike in Arvada
Dear Mike:
I think this is the first question from someone in Arvada. Where the heck is Arvada, sounds like it must be on the Mexican border. What do you think of that wall idea in your back yard? My old mentor Dr. Ambrose(who lived in Phoenix) came up with a plan he called the 50/50 rule. Build a wall 50 feet high, mount a 50 caliber gun every 50 yards. If any body comes with in 50 yards of the wall shoot them. I, myself, think this is a little extreme but I do like the idea of being able to control who comes into the best country in the world. Anyway back to the topic of “coprophagy,” which means crap-eater. To quote Bill Clinton when asked why he risked the scandalous affair with Monica L., “I did it because I could.” Mike, your dog eats caca because he can, and because it tastes good. Have your ever tried the sh@% sampler in your backyard? As many have told me: “Don’t knock it till you've tried it.” Really, there are all different theories out there as to why dogs eat poop. My theory on cat poop is simple. Cat food has so much protein and fat that does not get absorbed and is crapped out that it truly is a dog treat. There are a lot of reasons you can look up on the web like under-feeding, parasites, endocrine disorders etc, etc. Which may or may not be true. I have thousands of patients (although I really have no patience) who are completely healthy and love the taste of butt candy. So I guess our good buddy Bill was right. Dogs eat poop because they can. And maybe because they like it.
Dr. Jeff
March 2017
Dear Dr. Jeff,
Did I see you driving around in a new vehicle the other day? What the heck is that thing? And by the way, do you name your cars?
Terri in Cedaredge
Dear Terri,
Yes I finally ponied up and purchased a new/used vehicle. It is a 1989 Isuzu Trooper and cost a whopping 500 smackers. Dr. Susie’s dad got a new car and I was lucky enough to purchase this slightly used (106,430 miles) Trooper from him. Did I name him? (it’s a boy car, you can tell by the testicles hanging from the trailer hitch?;) Of course I did. A vehicle of this vintage deserves a name that conjures a stately image. But really what is in a name? Why do we name things? Let’s start with why I think people name things like dogs and cats and even cars. People even put names on their boats. Now all you armchair psychologists can write in and tell me that I know nothing and wish that evil things occur to me and my family. These litterboxes really stir the water. I wonder if President Trump gets as much hate mail as I do. At least I don't have to worry about a bunch of angry pet owners marching in front the SCVC. Can we change the name of the annual “Dog Jog and Pet Palooza” to “Dogs against dry food and leashes?” or “Dogs for Choice over their Bodies?” My mind wanders, it’s early, and the wind is blowing. Back to the topic, I believe people name things to give them an identity and thus personalize them. Once something is personalized you can give it affection. This is very obvious when it comes to naming pets. You don't love the stray dog you see running around (although you might feel sorry or angry that its owner doesn't care enough to keep it in), you don't love it like your pet that has a name. Naming something allows us to anthropomorphize it so that we can treat it like a human. Do you think our pets name us? A dog might. Our cats just think of us a “the help.” The question, what is in a name, you’ll have to figure out yourself for I have run out of space.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff,
Did I see you driving around in a new vehicle the other day? What the heck is that thing? And by the way, do you name your cars?
Terri in Cedaredge
Dear Terri,
Yes I finally ponied up and purchased a new/used vehicle. It is a 1989 Isuzu Trooper and cost a whopping 500 smackers. Dr. Susie’s dad got a new car and I was lucky enough to purchase this slightly used (106,430 miles) Trooper from him. Did I name him? (it’s a boy car, you can tell by the testicles hanging from the trailer hitch?;) Of course I did. A vehicle of this vintage deserves a name that conjures a stately image. But really what is in a name? Why do we name things? Let’s start with why I think people name things like dogs and cats and even cars. People even put names on their boats. Now all you armchair psychologists can write in and tell me that I know nothing and wish that evil things occur to me and my family. These litterboxes really stir the water. I wonder if President Trump gets as much hate mail as I do. At least I don't have to worry about a bunch of angry pet owners marching in front the SCVC. Can we change the name of the annual “Dog Jog and Pet Palooza” to “Dogs against dry food and leashes?” or “Dogs for Choice over their Bodies?” My mind wanders, it’s early, and the wind is blowing. Back to the topic, I believe people name things to give them an identity and thus personalize them. Once something is personalized you can give it affection. This is very obvious when it comes to naming pets. You don't love the stray dog you see running around (although you might feel sorry or angry that its owner doesn't care enough to keep it in), you don't love it like your pet that has a name. Naming something allows us to anthropomorphize it so that we can treat it like a human. Do you think our pets name us? A dog might. Our cats just think of us a “the help.” The question, what is in a name, you’ll have to figure out yourself for I have run out of space.
Dr. Jeff
Past Litterbox Q & A
February 2017
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I have a little dog with tons of energy. She is about to drive me crazy! I have been thinking about renting her out as a sled dog... Do you have any ideas to make her a better dog, one that I like to be around and can live in the same house with?
D in Eckert
Dear D in Eckert:
What gives, no body has a name with just one letter? Now if your name was Dee I could live with that but I'm not buying “D”. Yes, they are homonyms but that does not make "D" a name. So what I think, with my sherlock deductivity, is that your are afraid to give your full name for some nefarious reason. Did you rob a bank? Are you a drug dealer? Or worst of all, you're one of my relatives?!? Boy, do I have an imagination, but I'm still worried for you. So you have a dog with a ton of energy and you have a one letter name. I can't help you with the name but I can help you with your dog. Let me guess its name is “J”? Ok, Ok enough with the name fetish. Energy is an interesting thing. All living things have it, therefore dead things don’t. Some have a lot, some have a little and some have a ton. Energy can be positive or energy can be negative. I'm going to get a little ethereal here but stick with me. I believe that all energy starts positive and remains positive if allowed to flow from one positive thing to another. Two things can turn positive energy into negative energy, which leads to bad behavior. I am only going to discuss the one that relates to “J”. Remember earlier I said energy has to flow to remain good. Positive energy that remains pent up eventually turns bad. High energy dogs who are not allowed to exercise and give the world their positive energy eventually do naughty things, thus driving their owners crazy. The best way to let pent up energy flow out of your dog is to exercise him. I don't mean a walk around the block. People who have high energy dogs like Jack Russels, Border Collies and Labs need to exercise them until their tongues drag on the ground on a daily basis. Not on weekends only. Not only on days when you have extra time. EVERY DAY. Some people tell me “I'll just let him play with my other dogs." Sometimes that does not work because the high energy dog may not be the alpha and is therefore not allowed play freely. Some people tell me that they have a big fenced yard, so the dog gets all the exercise it needs. These aren't the answers. The answer is YOU, "D." Take "J" for long hikes in the mountains, play ball, go for a three mile run. Do whatever "J" likes. If you are too busy... then you have two options: find "J" a home that can handle a high energy dog, or hire some young high-energy person named "X" to get "J" the exercise she needs.
Dr. J (Haha, get it?)
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I have a little dog with tons of energy. She is about to drive me crazy! I have been thinking about renting her out as a sled dog... Do you have any ideas to make her a better dog, one that I like to be around and can live in the same house with?
D in Eckert
Dear D in Eckert:
What gives, no body has a name with just one letter? Now if your name was Dee I could live with that but I'm not buying “D”. Yes, they are homonyms but that does not make "D" a name. So what I think, with my sherlock deductivity, is that your are afraid to give your full name for some nefarious reason. Did you rob a bank? Are you a drug dealer? Or worst of all, you're one of my relatives?!? Boy, do I have an imagination, but I'm still worried for you. So you have a dog with a ton of energy and you have a one letter name. I can't help you with the name but I can help you with your dog. Let me guess its name is “J”? Ok, Ok enough with the name fetish. Energy is an interesting thing. All living things have it, therefore dead things don’t. Some have a lot, some have a little and some have a ton. Energy can be positive or energy can be negative. I'm going to get a little ethereal here but stick with me. I believe that all energy starts positive and remains positive if allowed to flow from one positive thing to another. Two things can turn positive energy into negative energy, which leads to bad behavior. I am only going to discuss the one that relates to “J”. Remember earlier I said energy has to flow to remain good. Positive energy that remains pent up eventually turns bad. High energy dogs who are not allowed to exercise and give the world their positive energy eventually do naughty things, thus driving their owners crazy. The best way to let pent up energy flow out of your dog is to exercise him. I don't mean a walk around the block. People who have high energy dogs like Jack Russels, Border Collies and Labs need to exercise them until their tongues drag on the ground on a daily basis. Not on weekends only. Not only on days when you have extra time. EVERY DAY. Some people tell me “I'll just let him play with my other dogs." Sometimes that does not work because the high energy dog may not be the alpha and is therefore not allowed play freely. Some people tell me that they have a big fenced yard, so the dog gets all the exercise it needs. These aren't the answers. The answer is YOU, "D." Take "J" for long hikes in the mountains, play ball, go for a three mile run. Do whatever "J" likes. If you are too busy... then you have two options: find "J" a home that can handle a high energy dog, or hire some young high-energy person named "X" to get "J" the exercise she needs.
Dr. J (Haha, get it?)
January 2017
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I just got a letter in the mail from my vet here in Phoenix. It says she will no longer see my wonderful little pug, Kingston, and has the name of 3 other vets I might want to try using for Kingston’s healthcare. Who does she think she is? By the way, she is the vet you recommended when you closed Carmel Animal Hospital for the light rail. Should I sue her? Do you remember what great care I took of my animals?
Lana in Phoenix.
Dear Lana,
Oh my! Thanks for bringing up some terrible memories. The Phoenix light rail project was a horrible time for me and my family, but behind every gray cloud is a silver lining. The silver lining of the light rail was getting my family out of that stinking hell-hole known as Phoenix, AZ. Another silver lining was being rid of you and your BS. Lana every veterinary clinic has clients they dread coming in, and sometimes get so sick of their nonsense, that they send them packing with a list of three other clinics (usually ones that nobody likes). I can think of several reasons Dr. ….. sent you packing. Do you remember the time when you called me at 3 am because “Little Kingy” got his nails trimmed at the groomer and you thought she got a little too close and just needed me to see him? Problem was you bitched about me charging an emergency fee for a ‘non-emergency.’ Do you remember the time he had been coughing for 2 weeks but when he kept you awake one night, it became an emergency at 2 am, and once again you complained about the X-ray and emergency fee? My receptionist used to call you Lana “the Piranha”. Dr. Ambrose (the greatest vet in the history of AZ vets) used to say even the devil couldn't please you. So Lana, to avoid being “fired” by another vet (I’ll bet I know two of the three vets you were referred to), here is a list of things to avoid: calling the vet after normal office hours and complaining about emergency fees (good veterinarians don't mind waking up at all hours for nice people and real emergencies), lying to the veterinary staff only to tell the vet a different story once he or she is in the room, going from one vet to another and bad mouthing the ones you’re not in front of (most of us talk to each other and joke about the Lanas of the world), checking Dr. Google and deciding that the medicine your vet prescribed has side effects that are so serious that you stop giving the medication and then complain to the vet that “Kingy” is not getting better (all good Vets know the side effects of drugs and have weighed them against not treating the disease, i.e. we all ask ourselves “which is worse; the disease or the side effects of the meds, and then choose the lesser of the two). Taking the ‘collar of shame’ off and letting your dog lick the incision and then coming in and telling the vet tech that the collar has been on the whole time (believe me, we know what a licked incision looks like). Lana, this is a short list and I am limited by space, but because you are so sweet and perfect, I am going to give you a bonus today. A few tips on how to make veterinary staff (remember- they are the ones who will have the vet’s ear six days a week) like you and not dread you: Be nice to others; don't lie to us; quit your bitching, it’s ok if you can’t afford what the Dr. recommends, but don’t tell us to do everything and then complain about the price, if what the Dr. recommends is not in your price range talk to him or her about it and together come up with a plan (veterinarians actually respect people who do this). Lana, it’s time to shape up or continue being shipped out to another vet.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I just got a letter in the mail from my vet here in Phoenix. It says she will no longer see my wonderful little pug, Kingston, and has the name of 3 other vets I might want to try using for Kingston’s healthcare. Who does she think she is? By the way, she is the vet you recommended when you closed Carmel Animal Hospital for the light rail. Should I sue her? Do you remember what great care I took of my animals?
Lana in Phoenix.
Dear Lana,
Oh my! Thanks for bringing up some terrible memories. The Phoenix light rail project was a horrible time for me and my family, but behind every gray cloud is a silver lining. The silver lining of the light rail was getting my family out of that stinking hell-hole known as Phoenix, AZ. Another silver lining was being rid of you and your BS. Lana every veterinary clinic has clients they dread coming in, and sometimes get so sick of their nonsense, that they send them packing with a list of three other clinics (usually ones that nobody likes). I can think of several reasons Dr. ….. sent you packing. Do you remember the time when you called me at 3 am because “Little Kingy” got his nails trimmed at the groomer and you thought she got a little too close and just needed me to see him? Problem was you bitched about me charging an emergency fee for a ‘non-emergency.’ Do you remember the time he had been coughing for 2 weeks but when he kept you awake one night, it became an emergency at 2 am, and once again you complained about the X-ray and emergency fee? My receptionist used to call you Lana “the Piranha”. Dr. Ambrose (the greatest vet in the history of AZ vets) used to say even the devil couldn't please you. So Lana, to avoid being “fired” by another vet (I’ll bet I know two of the three vets you were referred to), here is a list of things to avoid: calling the vet after normal office hours and complaining about emergency fees (good veterinarians don't mind waking up at all hours for nice people and real emergencies), lying to the veterinary staff only to tell the vet a different story once he or she is in the room, going from one vet to another and bad mouthing the ones you’re not in front of (most of us talk to each other and joke about the Lanas of the world), checking Dr. Google and deciding that the medicine your vet prescribed has side effects that are so serious that you stop giving the medication and then complain to the vet that “Kingy” is not getting better (all good Vets know the side effects of drugs and have weighed them against not treating the disease, i.e. we all ask ourselves “which is worse; the disease or the side effects of the meds, and then choose the lesser of the two). Taking the ‘collar of shame’ off and letting your dog lick the incision and then coming in and telling the vet tech that the collar has been on the whole time (believe me, we know what a licked incision looks like). Lana, this is a short list and I am limited by space, but because you are so sweet and perfect, I am going to give you a bonus today. A few tips on how to make veterinary staff (remember- they are the ones who will have the vet’s ear six days a week) like you and not dread you: Be nice to others; don't lie to us; quit your bitching, it’s ok if you can’t afford what the Dr. recommends, but don’t tell us to do everything and then complain about the price, if what the Dr. recommends is not in your price range talk to him or her about it and together come up with a plan (veterinarians actually respect people who do this). Lana, it’s time to shape up or continue being shipped out to another vet.
Dr. Jeff
December 2016
To the Good Doctor,
My dog, Deacon, a blue heeler, has developed a strange behavior. Deacon is always fed indoors so not to invite other critters to help themselves to his food. Recently, on a camping trip and then again on our annual hunting trip, Deacon was the designated camp dog. He is good at keeping cows out of the camp and out of our haystack. I fed him out of the same dish as at home, gave him the same food as always, but when he was fed outside or in a tent, Deacon always covered his food with leaves and twigs. We first thought maybe he inadvertently covered his food, so I uncovered it. But he covered it up again. Why do you suppose he insists on covering his food when fed outside?
Curious Carl in Cedaredge
Dear Carl,
Another great question, you peeps are awesome! When I go to El Tapitio for my monthly Mexican food fix, I eat 3 baskets of chips and 2 bowls of their cabbage dip before my meal arrives (go ahead and say it: I’m a glutton). So when the carne asada arrives I have about 4 bites and I’m full. Instead of asking the waiter for a bunch of sticks, I get a styrofoam to-go box. It is completely normal for a meat eater to “cache” his or her food. Cache is pronounced cash but don’t confuse the two. Both should be put away for a later date but one you can eat while the other just buys more left-overs and a refrigerator full of moldy styrofoam boxes. Right now you are probably thinking “yeah I get that, but why does he only do it when we are out in the woods.” Oh, my intelligente leetle frieend (that’s the only Spanish I know:), herein lies the knowledge you seek. Do it with me now…“hmmmmmmmm.” Most dogs do not cover their food in places they are comfortable or dominant. The woods are a different story. Instead of being a big fish in a little pond they are now the little fish in a pond full of big fish with big fish smells and sounds and big shiny white teeth and claws to eat and kill with. This reminds me of a fairy tale and a little girl who wandered the woods wearing a red hoody. I think she was a member of the Crips gang out of LA, or was it the Bloods? Sorry, back to dogs caching their food. I still think Little Red Riding Hood would have been a lot safer if she was wearing 400 square inches of hunter orange. She would have totally thrown the wolf for a loop showing up at granny’s looking like a hunter instead of some helpless little girl. I can’t even remember how the story ends but it is now time for me wrap the this month's edition of the Litter Box. Carl, it is totally normal for your dog to cover his food with forest stuff. If you look on the web you’ll find some people who will say its because he doesn’t like the food. That is pure BS. They’re probably wearing red hoodies!
Dr. Jeff
To the Good Doctor,
My dog, Deacon, a blue heeler, has developed a strange behavior. Deacon is always fed indoors so not to invite other critters to help themselves to his food. Recently, on a camping trip and then again on our annual hunting trip, Deacon was the designated camp dog. He is good at keeping cows out of the camp and out of our haystack. I fed him out of the same dish as at home, gave him the same food as always, but when he was fed outside or in a tent, Deacon always covered his food with leaves and twigs. We first thought maybe he inadvertently covered his food, so I uncovered it. But he covered it up again. Why do you suppose he insists on covering his food when fed outside?
Curious Carl in Cedaredge
Dear Carl,
Another great question, you peeps are awesome! When I go to El Tapitio for my monthly Mexican food fix, I eat 3 baskets of chips and 2 bowls of their cabbage dip before my meal arrives (go ahead and say it: I’m a glutton). So when the carne asada arrives I have about 4 bites and I’m full. Instead of asking the waiter for a bunch of sticks, I get a styrofoam to-go box. It is completely normal for a meat eater to “cache” his or her food. Cache is pronounced cash but don’t confuse the two. Both should be put away for a later date but one you can eat while the other just buys more left-overs and a refrigerator full of moldy styrofoam boxes. Right now you are probably thinking “yeah I get that, but why does he only do it when we are out in the woods.” Oh, my intelligente leetle frieend (that’s the only Spanish I know:), herein lies the knowledge you seek. Do it with me now…“hmmmmmmmm.” Most dogs do not cover their food in places they are comfortable or dominant. The woods are a different story. Instead of being a big fish in a little pond they are now the little fish in a pond full of big fish with big fish smells and sounds and big shiny white teeth and claws to eat and kill with. This reminds me of a fairy tale and a little girl who wandered the woods wearing a red hoody. I think she was a member of the Crips gang out of LA, or was it the Bloods? Sorry, back to dogs caching their food. I still think Little Red Riding Hood would have been a lot safer if she was wearing 400 square inches of hunter orange. She would have totally thrown the wolf for a loop showing up at granny’s looking like a hunter instead of some helpless little girl. I can’t even remember how the story ends but it is now time for me wrap the this month's edition of the Litter Box. Carl, it is totally normal for your dog to cover his food with forest stuff. If you look on the web you’ll find some people who will say its because he doesn’t like the food. That is pure BS. They’re probably wearing red hoodies!
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff November 2016
My wife and I are thinking about buying ski passes this year and would like to know if this is going to be be a good snow year.
Timothy
Dear Timothy,
Great animal question. I guess I’m getting a reputation of being more than just a vet, so I will use my uncanny Karnack the Great abilities and the internet (which is where the best info is) to come up with a weather prediction that will blow your socks off.
According to NOAA (a governmental organization made of educated sooth sayers and oracles) it looks like we are going to have a “la Nina" year. I think the english translation of “la” is warmer and the translation of “Nina” is dryer, because further down in the article I read they mentioned warmer dryer winter for the middle of the country which is where we live. Those weather guys sure like to use big words. So according to the educated expert buying a ski pass might not be a good idea, especially if you like to ski.
Wait!! Don’t put your skis back in to storage just yet. The Old Farmer’s Almanac has a different take on this years winter forecast. They don’t use big words or foreign languages, so I won’t have to translate. “Freezing cold and average snow fall.” If you can’t figure out what this means keep watching that other buffoon who calls himself “vet of the rockies.” One of his flunkies had to call us last week for vet advice. What a poser.
If you’re not totally confused, here is one more vaticination. According to my friend Mike Badding, one can look at the colors of these wooly little caterpillars to predict the weather. He was talking way over my head when describing the relationship of brown to black (my mind was swimming, I thought he was talking about La Rasa and Black Lives Matter rallies) ratios. So if you want to know the outcome of the wooly bugger theory you need to call Mike.
As usual I was able to bring animals and politics into an innocuous little weather question. Thanks for the great question Timothy.
Dr. Jeff.
PS. Mike’s WWPS (Wooly Weather Prediction System) predicts a dry fall with a wet spring. So, don’t call him unless he is wrong.
My wife and I are thinking about buying ski passes this year and would like to know if this is going to be be a good snow year.
Timothy
Dear Timothy,
Great animal question. I guess I’m getting a reputation of being more than just a vet, so I will use my uncanny Karnack the Great abilities and the internet (which is where the best info is) to come up with a weather prediction that will blow your socks off.
According to NOAA (a governmental organization made of educated sooth sayers and oracles) it looks like we are going to have a “la Nina" year. I think the english translation of “la” is warmer and the translation of “Nina” is dryer, because further down in the article I read they mentioned warmer dryer winter for the middle of the country which is where we live. Those weather guys sure like to use big words. So according to the educated expert buying a ski pass might not be a good idea, especially if you like to ski.
Wait!! Don’t put your skis back in to storage just yet. The Old Farmer’s Almanac has a different take on this years winter forecast. They don’t use big words or foreign languages, so I won’t have to translate. “Freezing cold and average snow fall.” If you can’t figure out what this means keep watching that other buffoon who calls himself “vet of the rockies.” One of his flunkies had to call us last week for vet advice. What a poser.
If you’re not totally confused, here is one more vaticination. According to my friend Mike Badding, one can look at the colors of these wooly little caterpillars to predict the weather. He was talking way over my head when describing the relationship of brown to black (my mind was swimming, I thought he was talking about La Rasa and Black Lives Matter rallies) ratios. So if you want to know the outcome of the wooly bugger theory you need to call Mike.
As usual I was able to bring animals and politics into an innocuous little weather question. Thanks for the great question Timothy.
Dr. Jeff.
PS. Mike’s WWPS (Wooly Weather Prediction System) predicts a dry fall with a wet spring. So, don’t call him unless he is wrong.
Dr. Jeff! October 2016
We have a male cat that recently will not stop humping everything! Blankets, couch, pillows, even our legs while we sleep! We now get woken up several times throughout the night, and disturbing him from his indulgence makes him very angry. Can you shed some light on this subject?
Jennifer in Austin
Dear Jennifer,
Great question! What I find interesting is that most cat behaviors are learned. Which leads me to ask: what is going on that the cats are watching and learning? Hubba hubba. Just kidding. Mating behavior is not one of those learned behaviors. It comes natural if you know what I mean. Heck I've got 4 great kids. Which is 2.2 children more than the average American household with married parents. So using your math skills (pre-common core) you can quickly calculate the average number of children is 1.8. Now if you are today’s youth it would take the next 45 minutes using the associative and distributive properties to come up with an estimate of 2. Back to humping. (Something I must be an expert in as demonstrated by above average family size). Now that you've put up with my snarky, teenage boy talk lets get down to business. There are many reasons that a neutered male cat might hump a friend, toy, or even its human. The 2 biggies are he wasn't neutered correctly and even though the testicles were removed not enough of the cord was removed and he still has some testosterone flowing through his veins. Horse people refer to this as “proud cut”. The second and more probable reason a neutered male cat develops stuffed animal attraction is stress. "What causes stress in cats?" you ask. Here’s a small list: moving to a new home, bringing in a new family member (human or animal), not enough play time, new furniture or flooring, new neighbors, outside cats fighting, change of seasons, not the right kind of attention, you going on vacation, disease or sickness in the cat humping or being humped… basically anything that is different including food and litter. I could go on forever but you get my drift. To help slow down this hump-fest you might try letting your kitties outside a little more to stimulate some of their natural instincts. Studies have shown (I hate when the Delta School Board prefaces all their lame reasons for using Common Core with those 3 words) that cats need to be living like the ultimate predator to keep from being stressed-out dudes. I’ve had clients ask if it is ok to give there cats a little “weed” to help de-stress them. “It sure helps me, Man.” The answer is no. Some day I’ll finish my “how to de-stress a cat” tips list, and if you ask real nice I’ll give it to you for free.
Peace out dudes and dudettes.
Dr. Jeff
We have a male cat that recently will not stop humping everything! Blankets, couch, pillows, even our legs while we sleep! We now get woken up several times throughout the night, and disturbing him from his indulgence makes him very angry. Can you shed some light on this subject?
Jennifer in Austin
Dear Jennifer,
Great question! What I find interesting is that most cat behaviors are learned. Which leads me to ask: what is going on that the cats are watching and learning? Hubba hubba. Just kidding. Mating behavior is not one of those learned behaviors. It comes natural if you know what I mean. Heck I've got 4 great kids. Which is 2.2 children more than the average American household with married parents. So using your math skills (pre-common core) you can quickly calculate the average number of children is 1.8. Now if you are today’s youth it would take the next 45 minutes using the associative and distributive properties to come up with an estimate of 2. Back to humping. (Something I must be an expert in as demonstrated by above average family size). Now that you've put up with my snarky, teenage boy talk lets get down to business. There are many reasons that a neutered male cat might hump a friend, toy, or even its human. The 2 biggies are he wasn't neutered correctly and even though the testicles were removed not enough of the cord was removed and he still has some testosterone flowing through his veins. Horse people refer to this as “proud cut”. The second and more probable reason a neutered male cat develops stuffed animal attraction is stress. "What causes stress in cats?" you ask. Here’s a small list: moving to a new home, bringing in a new family member (human or animal), not enough play time, new furniture or flooring, new neighbors, outside cats fighting, change of seasons, not the right kind of attention, you going on vacation, disease or sickness in the cat humping or being humped… basically anything that is different including food and litter. I could go on forever but you get my drift. To help slow down this hump-fest you might try letting your kitties outside a little more to stimulate some of their natural instincts. Studies have shown (I hate when the Delta School Board prefaces all their lame reasons for using Common Core with those 3 words) that cats need to be living like the ultimate predator to keep from being stressed-out dudes. I’ve had clients ask if it is ok to give there cats a little “weed” to help de-stress them. “It sure helps me, Man.” The answer is no. Some day I’ll finish my “how to de-stress a cat” tips list, and if you ask real nice I’ll give it to you for free.
Peace out dudes and dudettes.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, September 2016
Every night when I come home from work and take my shoes off my dog licks my feet for about ten minutes. Is this normal?
Mike in Cheyenne
Dear Mike,
That is so gross. You are creeping me out. I can think of 4 reasons a dog might lick its owners feet. Number one is submission. Many times a submissive animal will lick a more dominant animal’s mouth or feet. I hope you’re not letting your dog lick your mouth! I would have to call the cops about that one. Your dog is licking your feet to tell you he’s happy with the hierarchical arrangement you two have agreed upon, whether you know about it or not. The second reason Fido is licking your feet might be to find out information about where you've been. Throughout the day we are exposed to different chemicals in the air we breathe and food we eat, and places we go. These chemicals can be secreted from our sweat glands and a dog can taste these while licking our feet. It just so happens that our feet have large number of these little sweat glands. Do you have extra sweaty feet? The third reason your dog licks your feet is that he likes the way your feet taste. Number four, you let him. He wouldn't lick your feet if you did not let him. Mike, I really do not know if this is normal, but I hope you and your dog have a long, spit-filled relationship together..
Sincerely,
Dr. Jeff
P.S. Last month I wrote about the Wyatt Tietz Memorial Golf Tournament, and I just wanted to say thanks to the great guys I played with! And... I won a Powderhorn pass again this year!! This must be my lucky tourney ;)
Every night when I come home from work and take my shoes off my dog licks my feet for about ten minutes. Is this normal?
Mike in Cheyenne
Dear Mike,
That is so gross. You are creeping me out. I can think of 4 reasons a dog might lick its owners feet. Number one is submission. Many times a submissive animal will lick a more dominant animal’s mouth or feet. I hope you’re not letting your dog lick your mouth! I would have to call the cops about that one. Your dog is licking your feet to tell you he’s happy with the hierarchical arrangement you two have agreed upon, whether you know about it or not. The second reason Fido is licking your feet might be to find out information about where you've been. Throughout the day we are exposed to different chemicals in the air we breathe and food we eat, and places we go. These chemicals can be secreted from our sweat glands and a dog can taste these while licking our feet. It just so happens that our feet have large number of these little sweat glands. Do you have extra sweaty feet? The third reason your dog licks your feet is that he likes the way your feet taste. Number four, you let him. He wouldn't lick your feet if you did not let him. Mike, I really do not know if this is normal, but I hope you and your dog have a long, spit-filled relationship together..
Sincerely,
Dr. Jeff
P.S. Last month I wrote about the Wyatt Tietz Memorial Golf Tournament, and I just wanted to say thanks to the great guys I played with! And... I won a Powderhorn pass again this year!! This must be my lucky tourney ;)
Dear Dr. Jeff, August 2016
My husband was bitten by a dog recently, and the owner of the dog said “big dogs shouldn’t be put on a leash.” Could you address the responsibility that dog owners have to control their animals?
Signed, Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
Thanks for your eye opening letter. You’ve triggered a sore spot near to my heart. If I’ve heard your story once, I have heard it a million times. Stories like yours used to amaze me, now I just hang my head in disgust. You don't know how many times a smaller dog is attacked by the neighbors free roaming big dog (who supposedly never leaves his yard) and the neighbors response is “she/he has never done that before,” or even better “he/she would never do that, your dog must have provoked my dog to come into your yard and attack your dog.” It is my opinion that people who let their potentially vicious dogs roam because they are free spirits are brainless idiots. Sorry, but I'm not in a PC mood today. People with mean dogs will tell you “he hasn’t ever bit anybody.” But when you look a little deeper there were plenty of warning signs and lame excuses like, “the neighbor kid provoked ‘Precious’ to attack him,” “Fluffy wants to attack the UPS driver because he drives a big brown truck and Fluffy just hates brown.” Does that mean its OK for Fluffy to attack people with brown skin? Give me a break. These people have a million excuses, but the reality is… they're irresponsible. Here is a real life story that happened to me in my clinic in Phoenix. Hang on, you won’t believe its true, but the only things I have changed are the owner’s and dog’s names. Like all good practices, Carmel Animal Hospital saw many new clients that were dissatisfied with the current vet they went to. So when Miss Leader brought the lab mix (the mix is the scary part!), Angel, in to see me for the first time I just thought, “good we can help another 4-legged family member to live a long healthy live.” Boy was I naive! When I first walked into the exam room, I was greeted by a snarling, frothing set of white teeth lunging at the end of a 6 foot lead. I know it was a 6 foot lead because our exam rooms where 10 feet by 10 feet and I was using every bit of the left over 4 feet to maintain my composure. Needless to say I used my best manners when I introduced my self to Miss Leader and Angel, the she-devil. Although my usual manly voice may have been a bit shaky. “It looks like we are going to have get a muzzle for Angel so we can give her a proper physical exam before we give her the rabies and distemper shots,” I say, while being pelted with canine saliva each time Angel lunged and barked at me. “Oh, my Angel has never bit anybody and it would just pain her so and take her spirit away with a muzzle. I can hold her for you. Angel understands me. She’s named Angel for a reason,” Miss Leader replied. “OK, but be careful I don't want either of us to get hurt,” I shakily reply. Normally I start my physical exam at the head and work my way to the tail of the dog, but I’ve seen enough of Angel’s head to assess what a peach she really is. I figure if I can just listen to her heart that will be good enough for me to assess her over health. What a mistake! Just as I gently touch Angel’s chest with the stethoscope she wheels around under Miss Leader’s arm and just misses biting my nose and right cheek off (I was much younger then and was able to do a Keanu Reeve Matrix move to avoid the frothing, white, snapping teeth of Angel the dog from hell). “Oh my, (heard that before?) I guess Angel doesn't like stethoscopes,” was the best thing Miss Leader could come up with. “Then she’s really not going to like the shots,” was all I could think. “Let me get one of my highly trained veterinary technicians and a muzzle so we can give Angel her shots.” I would have had better luck finding Donald Trump at a Black Lives Matter rally. Vet techs have an interesting way of disappearing when a doctor needs help with a sweetheart like Angel. I found them all in the back cleaning lint from under the cages. Shannon was the lucky one selected to cross the river Styx with me. When Shannon and I walked into the room Angel’s rage doubled. I wondered what would happen if I brought all the staff in to see little miss Angel. “Oh (don’t say it!!) my, that muzzle really has Angel worked up. She won’t need a muzzle. Angel has never bit anybody,” pleaded Miss Leader. “Only because I’m really quick when staring White Fang’s teeth down is the only reason she hasn’t bit anybody,” I scolded Miss Leader. I was done with thinking bad thoughts and was now in full verbal assault mode. “Are you insane, I almost met my first plastic surgeon and you have the gall to inform me that Angel doesn't bite?” “Do you want to put the muzzle on, or do you want me and Shannon to rabies pole Angel and give her the shots that she is past due on?” Knowing neither of her options are good she chooses the lesser of the two evils (sounds like this years presidential election) and decides to put the muzzle on Angel. “Are you sure we need this?” Miss Leader pleads. “Look, the sooner we get this done, the sooner Angel can be back in her yard relaxing in the sun,” I assert. “Oh my, (I’m ready to puke) I would never cage Angel in a yard she is a free spir……OUCH!” Growl, Snap. “I’m bleeding and I’m suing you. You provoked Angel to bite me!” Guess who did not get a rabies shot, but got 10 days of rabies quarantine. This was Angel’s second rabies quarantine and I was her 5th vet. “Gee, I wonder why?” We were never sued (I think Miss Leader ran her story by some ambulance chasers and with Angel’s history even the most desperate, disbarred defender of the delusional would not take Miss Leader’s case). I swear this is a true story. Lesson: ALL dogs can bite, bigger mouths cause more damage, and cities have leash laws for a reason!!!
My husband was bitten by a dog recently, and the owner of the dog said “big dogs shouldn’t be put on a leash.” Could you address the responsibility that dog owners have to control their animals?
Signed, Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
Thanks for your eye opening letter. You’ve triggered a sore spot near to my heart. If I’ve heard your story once, I have heard it a million times. Stories like yours used to amaze me, now I just hang my head in disgust. You don't know how many times a smaller dog is attacked by the neighbors free roaming big dog (who supposedly never leaves his yard) and the neighbors response is “she/he has never done that before,” or even better “he/she would never do that, your dog must have provoked my dog to come into your yard and attack your dog.” It is my opinion that people who let their potentially vicious dogs roam because they are free spirits are brainless idiots. Sorry, but I'm not in a PC mood today. People with mean dogs will tell you “he hasn’t ever bit anybody.” But when you look a little deeper there were plenty of warning signs and lame excuses like, “the neighbor kid provoked ‘Precious’ to attack him,” “Fluffy wants to attack the UPS driver because he drives a big brown truck and Fluffy just hates brown.” Does that mean its OK for Fluffy to attack people with brown skin? Give me a break. These people have a million excuses, but the reality is… they're irresponsible. Here is a real life story that happened to me in my clinic in Phoenix. Hang on, you won’t believe its true, but the only things I have changed are the owner’s and dog’s names. Like all good practices, Carmel Animal Hospital saw many new clients that were dissatisfied with the current vet they went to. So when Miss Leader brought the lab mix (the mix is the scary part!), Angel, in to see me for the first time I just thought, “good we can help another 4-legged family member to live a long healthy live.” Boy was I naive! When I first walked into the exam room, I was greeted by a snarling, frothing set of white teeth lunging at the end of a 6 foot lead. I know it was a 6 foot lead because our exam rooms where 10 feet by 10 feet and I was using every bit of the left over 4 feet to maintain my composure. Needless to say I used my best manners when I introduced my self to Miss Leader and Angel, the she-devil. Although my usual manly voice may have been a bit shaky. “It looks like we are going to have get a muzzle for Angel so we can give her a proper physical exam before we give her the rabies and distemper shots,” I say, while being pelted with canine saliva each time Angel lunged and barked at me. “Oh, my Angel has never bit anybody and it would just pain her so and take her spirit away with a muzzle. I can hold her for you. Angel understands me. She’s named Angel for a reason,” Miss Leader replied. “OK, but be careful I don't want either of us to get hurt,” I shakily reply. Normally I start my physical exam at the head and work my way to the tail of the dog, but I’ve seen enough of Angel’s head to assess what a peach she really is. I figure if I can just listen to her heart that will be good enough for me to assess her over health. What a mistake! Just as I gently touch Angel’s chest with the stethoscope she wheels around under Miss Leader’s arm and just misses biting my nose and right cheek off (I was much younger then and was able to do a Keanu Reeve Matrix move to avoid the frothing, white, snapping teeth of Angel the dog from hell). “Oh my, (heard that before?) I guess Angel doesn't like stethoscopes,” was the best thing Miss Leader could come up with. “Then she’s really not going to like the shots,” was all I could think. “Let me get one of my highly trained veterinary technicians and a muzzle so we can give Angel her shots.” I would have had better luck finding Donald Trump at a Black Lives Matter rally. Vet techs have an interesting way of disappearing when a doctor needs help with a sweetheart like Angel. I found them all in the back cleaning lint from under the cages. Shannon was the lucky one selected to cross the river Styx with me. When Shannon and I walked into the room Angel’s rage doubled. I wondered what would happen if I brought all the staff in to see little miss Angel. “Oh (don’t say it!!) my, that muzzle really has Angel worked up. She won’t need a muzzle. Angel has never bit anybody,” pleaded Miss Leader. “Only because I’m really quick when staring White Fang’s teeth down is the only reason she hasn’t bit anybody,” I scolded Miss Leader. I was done with thinking bad thoughts and was now in full verbal assault mode. “Are you insane, I almost met my first plastic surgeon and you have the gall to inform me that Angel doesn't bite?” “Do you want to put the muzzle on, or do you want me and Shannon to rabies pole Angel and give her the shots that she is past due on?” Knowing neither of her options are good she chooses the lesser of the two evils (sounds like this years presidential election) and decides to put the muzzle on Angel. “Are you sure we need this?” Miss Leader pleads. “Look, the sooner we get this done, the sooner Angel can be back in her yard relaxing in the sun,” I assert. “Oh my, (I’m ready to puke) I would never cage Angel in a yard she is a free spir……OUCH!” Growl, Snap. “I’m bleeding and I’m suing you. You provoked Angel to bite me!” Guess who did not get a rabies shot, but got 10 days of rabies quarantine. This was Angel’s second rabies quarantine and I was her 5th vet. “Gee, I wonder why?” We were never sued (I think Miss Leader ran her story by some ambulance chasers and with Angel’s history even the most desperate, disbarred defender of the delusional would not take Miss Leader’s case). I swear this is a true story. Lesson: ALL dogs can bite, bigger mouths cause more damage, and cities have leash laws for a reason!!!
July 2016
Dear Purveyors of The Litterbox.
No question this month, but...if you remember last November's Litterbox I shared about the best non-profit on the western slope, the Wyatt Tietz Foundation. To which a great many of you dug deep into your pockets and generously donated. I tell all the vets I see that we have the best pet owners in the world! Just to remind you, the Wyatt Tietz Foundation helps families who have children with cancer get to hospitals so that their dying child can get the care they need to perhaps... LIVE! 100% of the money donations are used to help the children with cancer and their families. Unlike the Clinton Foundation in which 10% goes to help people (send the hate mail to: 1 Don't Want To Hear It Road, Somewhere, CA). No, I'm not asking you to donate. On August 6th, The Wyatt Tietz Foundation is having their annual golf tournament to raise money for families with children diagnosed with cancer (have I said that enought times?). I have bought and paid for 2 foursomes (get your mind out of the gutter!) in the tourney and am looking for like-minded people to join me! But first, there are some simple ground rules. Number one, every time I hit the ball you must complement me (I actually stink, but need the positive feedback for my fragile ego). Just kidding. Second, you must buy as many mulligans as Dan and Heather allow, and third, buy lots of raffle tickets (if you remember last year, I won an annual ski pass to Powderhorn). And last but not least, you can't take anything on the course too seriously (you MUST have fun). Sooo... if you think you would like to have a blast and play a round of golf for free, we are taking the first seven callers who call the office and say they want to play on Friday, July 15th at 8 am. No fair calling earlier and bugging Susie by pressing '1' for emergency. Who knows, there may be some SCVC goodies in it for you too!
Dr. Jeff
Dear Purveyors of The Litterbox.
No question this month, but...if you remember last November's Litterbox I shared about the best non-profit on the western slope, the Wyatt Tietz Foundation. To which a great many of you dug deep into your pockets and generously donated. I tell all the vets I see that we have the best pet owners in the world! Just to remind you, the Wyatt Tietz Foundation helps families who have children with cancer get to hospitals so that their dying child can get the care they need to perhaps... LIVE! 100% of the money donations are used to help the children with cancer and their families. Unlike the Clinton Foundation in which 10% goes to help people (send the hate mail to: 1 Don't Want To Hear It Road, Somewhere, CA). No, I'm not asking you to donate. On August 6th, The Wyatt Tietz Foundation is having their annual golf tournament to raise money for families with children diagnosed with cancer (have I said that enought times?). I have bought and paid for 2 foursomes (get your mind out of the gutter!) in the tourney and am looking for like-minded people to join me! But first, there are some simple ground rules. Number one, every time I hit the ball you must complement me (I actually stink, but need the positive feedback for my fragile ego). Just kidding. Second, you must buy as many mulligans as Dan and Heather allow, and third, buy lots of raffle tickets (if you remember last year, I won an annual ski pass to Powderhorn). And last but not least, you can't take anything on the course too seriously (you MUST have fun). Sooo... if you think you would like to have a blast and play a round of golf for free, we are taking the first seven callers who call the office and say they want to play on Friday, July 15th at 8 am. No fair calling earlier and bugging Susie by pressing '1' for emergency. Who knows, there may be some SCVC goodies in it for you too!
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, June 2016
I love your newsletters and read them every month on the internet. Thanks! I have two dogs and two cats, and take very good care of them (just ask my vet!). A month ago I went to the local shelter to adopt a new cat and was turned down because I have more pets than they think is necessary. If I take good care of my pets, why does it matter how many I have?
Laura in Loveland, CO
Dear Laura,
You are right. If a person takes good care of their pets, ie. Regular vet care, vaccines, and housing, “What does it matter!” Ahh... herein lies the problem with society today. I would think an animal shelter would want to adopt pets out to good pet-caring people like yourself. Makes sense to me. But this pet shelter is just a microcosm of any bureaucratic entity in which low IQ people are given a little authority. Really the proper word is control. Last week I was listening to the radio, on my way to Grand Junction to pick up bleach, paper towels, and other such sundries for the clinic. For that one hour drive the host was talking about control and power at different levels of government. The title for his rant could have been “there is no power in ‘yes’.” When you give a power seeker the authority to say “No,” you have given them the power or control which they need to feed their ego. Do you think the Congress and President really believe they are doing good, or is it a power trip? It’s not about what is right or wrong. It’s about power. Six years ago we were looking to build our state-of-the-art new clinic building in the Cedaredge city limits. We were told “No” you can’t build here or there because of zoning. Instead of choosing a new business that would employ citizens, look nice and serve the community, the City Manager chose a run-down trailer park, vacant lots, mini storage and crumbling sidewalks for her authority to say ‘No’. Sad, isn’t it? There is probably a cat in a 2x2x2 cold steel cage wanting to go to a good new home like yours, but can’t because a power hungry bureaucrat can’t say yes. And the shelter is wondering why they are overrun with animals. Go figure. You know what else is funny, I have clients that work in the Cedaredge government asking me why we didn’t build in the city. Momma Mia! So here’s my question to you: How do we get rid of the 20% of power seekers in our own lives, and replace them with the 80% who want what is truly right?
Dr. Jeff
P.S. Don’t feel too bad, Laura. My wife and I were turned down when we wanted to adopt a kitten from the Larimer County Humane Society just before graduation from vet school. Imagine, two soon-to-be-vets, found not to be a suitable home for a kitten we had actually cared for and treated already at the vet teaching hospital. It is a crazy world we live in.
I love your newsletters and read them every month on the internet. Thanks! I have two dogs and two cats, and take very good care of them (just ask my vet!). A month ago I went to the local shelter to adopt a new cat and was turned down because I have more pets than they think is necessary. If I take good care of my pets, why does it matter how many I have?
Laura in Loveland, CO
Dear Laura,
You are right. If a person takes good care of their pets, ie. Regular vet care, vaccines, and housing, “What does it matter!” Ahh... herein lies the problem with society today. I would think an animal shelter would want to adopt pets out to good pet-caring people like yourself. Makes sense to me. But this pet shelter is just a microcosm of any bureaucratic entity in which low IQ people are given a little authority. Really the proper word is control. Last week I was listening to the radio, on my way to Grand Junction to pick up bleach, paper towels, and other such sundries for the clinic. For that one hour drive the host was talking about control and power at different levels of government. The title for his rant could have been “there is no power in ‘yes’.” When you give a power seeker the authority to say “No,” you have given them the power or control which they need to feed their ego. Do you think the Congress and President really believe they are doing good, or is it a power trip? It’s not about what is right or wrong. It’s about power. Six years ago we were looking to build our state-of-the-art new clinic building in the Cedaredge city limits. We were told “No” you can’t build here or there because of zoning. Instead of choosing a new business that would employ citizens, look nice and serve the community, the City Manager chose a run-down trailer park, vacant lots, mini storage and crumbling sidewalks for her authority to say ‘No’. Sad, isn’t it? There is probably a cat in a 2x2x2 cold steel cage wanting to go to a good new home like yours, but can’t because a power hungry bureaucrat can’t say yes. And the shelter is wondering why they are overrun with animals. Go figure. You know what else is funny, I have clients that work in the Cedaredge government asking me why we didn’t build in the city. Momma Mia! So here’s my question to you: How do we get rid of the 20% of power seekers in our own lives, and replace them with the 80% who want what is truly right?
Dr. Jeff
P.S. Don’t feel too bad, Laura. My wife and I were turned down when we wanted to adopt a kitten from the Larimer County Humane Society just before graduation from vet school. Imagine, two soon-to-be-vets, found not to be a suitable home for a kitten we had actually cared for and treated already at the vet teaching hospital. It is a crazy world we live in.
WARNING: If you are easily offended or sick and tired of politics, STOP READING!
Dear Dr. Jeff, May 2016
In last month’s issue of the Litterbox, you sarcastically made fun of Donald Trump’s hair. Since you are so smart, why don’t you run for political office and see how you get treated!
Dan in Cedaredge
Dear Dan,
Good question. There are two reasons I would not run for political office. Numero uno: I am not a multibillionaire. Unless you have a lot of money to donate to my political campaign, I can’t afford it. Number 2: Nobody could handle my political views(or maybe a very small number of people could). Like no more welfare for people who can work. There are a few groups of people who should qualify for it, like orphans, children, and mentally handicapped people. If you’re old enough to work, get off the system. There would be no more unemployment welfare, get a job!! Another idea that people would not appreciate is no more checks written to foreign countries, like Pakistan and Syria. Why are we still giving those dirtbags our hard earned cash? Another thing I would do is cut America’s dependence on foreign oil. Why can’t we drill here? It’s because the self-righteous eco-freaks will have a tantrum. If they are so worried about Mother Earth, why aren’t they protesting over in Iran, Iraq and China? I’ll tell you why – because they would get their heads chopped off! Kumbaya, blah! I’m all for finding alternative fuels, but until we’ve got those perfected we need to be self-sufficient. Now moving on to foreign policy. America first. We used to be the greatest country in the world. Until the last two presidents ruined that. What would I do? Whatever it takes. Despite collateral damage. Dan, I know this kind of honesty might hurt your feelings, but too bad! You asked, I replied. So if honesty is not something you want, I recommend voting for Hilary(she doesn’t know what the truth is), or the “Donald,” who will do whatever it takes to make a “deal,” incluiding lying. As Jack Nicholas said in A Few Good Men, “You can’t handle the truth.” And only a few good people could handle my pre-60’s philosophy.
P.S. I had a whole lot more to write about, but Dr. Susie would only let me go so far…
Dear Dr. Jeff, May 2016
In last month’s issue of the Litterbox, you sarcastically made fun of Donald Trump’s hair. Since you are so smart, why don’t you run for political office and see how you get treated!
Dan in Cedaredge
Dear Dan,
Good question. There are two reasons I would not run for political office. Numero uno: I am not a multibillionaire. Unless you have a lot of money to donate to my political campaign, I can’t afford it. Number 2: Nobody could handle my political views(or maybe a very small number of people could). Like no more welfare for people who can work. There are a few groups of people who should qualify for it, like orphans, children, and mentally handicapped people. If you’re old enough to work, get off the system. There would be no more unemployment welfare, get a job!! Another idea that people would not appreciate is no more checks written to foreign countries, like Pakistan and Syria. Why are we still giving those dirtbags our hard earned cash? Another thing I would do is cut America’s dependence on foreign oil. Why can’t we drill here? It’s because the self-righteous eco-freaks will have a tantrum. If they are so worried about Mother Earth, why aren’t they protesting over in Iran, Iraq and China? I’ll tell you why – because they would get their heads chopped off! Kumbaya, blah! I’m all for finding alternative fuels, but until we’ve got those perfected we need to be self-sufficient. Now moving on to foreign policy. America first. We used to be the greatest country in the world. Until the last two presidents ruined that. What would I do? Whatever it takes. Despite collateral damage. Dan, I know this kind of honesty might hurt your feelings, but too bad! You asked, I replied. So if honesty is not something you want, I recommend voting for Hilary(she doesn’t know what the truth is), or the “Donald,” who will do whatever it takes to make a “deal,” incluiding lying. As Jack Nicholas said in A Few Good Men, “You can’t handle the truth.” And only a few good people could handle my pre-60’s philosophy.
P.S. I had a whole lot more to write about, but Dr. Susie would only let me go so far…
Dear Dr. Jeff, April 2016
I have a question for you. My neighbor keeps talking about feral cats. Is that some special type of cat? We have lots of cats running all over our neighborhood, but they just look like regular ones to me. Can you help me out? Thanks.
Annie in Cedaredge
Dear Annie,
Did you know the best veterinary receptionist in Delta county is also named Annie and happens to work here at SCVC? Pretty cool, huh! So you want to know about feral cats. All the kitties you see running around and the ones that live with us are all the same species. Notice how I stress "little." I've seen some big ones around here with tan bodies, or ones with tufts in their ears and bobtails. We aren't talking about those. Back to feral cats. The definition of a feral cat is a cat that has had no human socialization. It is a domestic cat that was born in the wild and had NO contact with humans. This is not to be confused with a stray which is defined as a cat that has had human socialization and then was lost, ran away, dumped or left behind when someone moved. If you or anybody you know fits the last two categories you ought to be ashamed of yourself and have bad things happen to you (I won't say what I'm really thinking should happen to people who dump or abandon their cats!). Sorry about the rant. There are some things I feel very strongly about. Don't even ask how I feel about marijuana! It is probably strays that your neighbor is talking about. Feral cats tend to be more nocturnal and act more like their bigger cousins, staying away from houses and out of human sight, whereas strays are out during daylight hours. Strays and feral cats can be very aggressive so be careful and never try to touch a cat that you don't know. It is our experience here at SCVC that a feral cat will hide in the back of a trap and be almost motionless, while a stray may lash out and be bolder around us. Which gets me to our feral/stray cat spay and neuter program that we have... We recognize that there are a lot of unowned cats here in Delta county. We would like to help control the population, and so have a program to make fixing these cats affordable. For feral or stray cats brought in a live trap, we will spay the girls and tip the ear for $70, and neuter and ear-tip the boys for $35. We do the ear-tipping so these cats can be recognized as fixed if they are ever caught again. Did you know that a single pair of cats can be responsible for producing 160,000 more cats in just 7 years? That is crazy!! So if you don't want that many cats running around your neighborhood, catch those cats and have 'em fixed!!
Annie, I hope this helps clarify the situation.
Dr. Jeff
I have a question for you. My neighbor keeps talking about feral cats. Is that some special type of cat? We have lots of cats running all over our neighborhood, but they just look like regular ones to me. Can you help me out? Thanks.
Annie in Cedaredge
Dear Annie,
Did you know the best veterinary receptionist in Delta county is also named Annie and happens to work here at SCVC? Pretty cool, huh! So you want to know about feral cats. All the kitties you see running around and the ones that live with us are all the same species. Notice how I stress "little." I've seen some big ones around here with tan bodies, or ones with tufts in their ears and bobtails. We aren't talking about those. Back to feral cats. The definition of a feral cat is a cat that has had no human socialization. It is a domestic cat that was born in the wild and had NO contact with humans. This is not to be confused with a stray which is defined as a cat that has had human socialization and then was lost, ran away, dumped or left behind when someone moved. If you or anybody you know fits the last two categories you ought to be ashamed of yourself and have bad things happen to you (I won't say what I'm really thinking should happen to people who dump or abandon their cats!). Sorry about the rant. There are some things I feel very strongly about. Don't even ask how I feel about marijuana! It is probably strays that your neighbor is talking about. Feral cats tend to be more nocturnal and act more like their bigger cousins, staying away from houses and out of human sight, whereas strays are out during daylight hours. Strays and feral cats can be very aggressive so be careful and never try to touch a cat that you don't know. It is our experience here at SCVC that a feral cat will hide in the back of a trap and be almost motionless, while a stray may lash out and be bolder around us. Which gets me to our feral/stray cat spay and neuter program that we have... We recognize that there are a lot of unowned cats here in Delta county. We would like to help control the population, and so have a program to make fixing these cats affordable. For feral or stray cats brought in a live trap, we will spay the girls and tip the ear for $70, and neuter and ear-tip the boys for $35. We do the ear-tipping so these cats can be recognized as fixed if they are ever caught again. Did you know that a single pair of cats can be responsible for producing 160,000 more cats in just 7 years? That is crazy!! So if you don't want that many cats running around your neighborhood, catch those cats and have 'em fixed!!
Annie, I hope this helps clarify the situation.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, March 2016
Every spring for the past 2 years, my 6 year old cat starts to pull out her hair on her sides and tummy. My husband and I think she is just trying to get ready for summer and is thinning her coat. Are we right?
Ann
Dear Ann,
Thanks for the good question. The highly sophisticated term we use when our feline friends "thin their coat," is barbering. I wonder if barbers consider it barbering as they trim the few remaining hairs us older gents have on our heads... I try and have as little as possible trimmed off and prefer the Donald Trump comb-over to hide my bald spots (does that guy have a mat to cover his bald spot or what?!). You would think with the kind of money he has that somebody could come up with a better way to cover that noggin of his. Back to the question. The most common reason cats pull their hair out is itchy skin which is either caused by parasites(fleas, etc.), stress, or the most common reason - allergies. If a cat is barbering in the springtime it tells me we probably have an environmental allergy vs. a food allergy. A cat who does it year round is more likely to have a food allergy, or fleas. The stress cause is a whole other topic, which I'll have to save for another day. And the fact that your cat does this every year at about this time is more consistent with an environmental allergy. I'm sure your vet can help with your kitty's new hairdo.
Sincerely,
Dr. Jeff
Every spring for the past 2 years, my 6 year old cat starts to pull out her hair on her sides and tummy. My husband and I think she is just trying to get ready for summer and is thinning her coat. Are we right?
Ann
Dear Ann,
Thanks for the good question. The highly sophisticated term we use when our feline friends "thin their coat," is barbering. I wonder if barbers consider it barbering as they trim the few remaining hairs us older gents have on our heads... I try and have as little as possible trimmed off and prefer the Donald Trump comb-over to hide my bald spots (does that guy have a mat to cover his bald spot or what?!). You would think with the kind of money he has that somebody could come up with a better way to cover that noggin of his. Back to the question. The most common reason cats pull their hair out is itchy skin which is either caused by parasites(fleas, etc.), stress, or the most common reason - allergies. If a cat is barbering in the springtime it tells me we probably have an environmental allergy vs. a food allergy. A cat who does it year round is more likely to have a food allergy, or fleas. The stress cause is a whole other topic, which I'll have to save for another day. And the fact that your cat does this every year at about this time is more consistent with an environmental allergy. I'm sure your vet can help with your kitty's new hairdo.
Sincerely,
Dr. Jeff
February 2016
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I have a sweet Addisonian mixed breed dog who has lived in the city most of her life but has gradually adapted to the ways of the farm. Zoos comes with me to the vineyard and digs through the snow for hours in the grapevine rows rousting voles and mice. She has even caught and eaten some! Her tail wags most of the time so she must enjoy it although it looks like a very exhausting activity to me. Do I need to consider any hazards like rodent fleas, bubonic plague or other problems she might encounter while she pursues this hobby? She is getting plenty of good food so she can't really be that hungry.
Max in Hotchkiss
Dear Max,
Good question. Sounds like Zoos is having a good time, keeping your orchard free from pests. Your question brings up a couple of things to discuss. First the "wagging tail." Did you know that almost all dog bites occur when a dog is wagging its tail? No, you say? Yes, I say. Remember dogs are really non-verbal communicators and the tail plays a very important role in NVC(non-verbal communication). In canine NVC the tail is like a flag that is saying 'pay attention.' A scared dog will have the tail between the legs or very low, but it will be wagging. A very aggressive dog will have its tail straight up (or maybe over its back) and it will be wagging, saying to everyone who can see it, "I'm ready for a fight!" The happy dog tail is somewhere between those two extremes, and saying "Come pet me." Zoos sounds like a nice dog, but when she's in hunting mode, I'll bet her tail is more stiff like an aggressive dog and you want to be a little careful not to startle her when her honker is buried in the snow. I know, Zoos is really nice and would never bite anybody... Back to the plague(yersinia pestis). Although dogs tend to be more resistant to plague than humans or cats, they can get it and die, but before that they can give it to us. Here in the southwest, it is the prairie dog who carries the fleas that spread plague. It would be very rare for a vole or a mouse to harbor those fleas, but it could happen. I would be more concerned with round worms and tapeworms which most voles and mice carry. Guess what? You can get round worms from your dog, which can crawl around under your skin or enter the back of your eyeball (check our 'ocular larval migrans' on google) and cause you to go blind. For this reason, I would make sure that Zoos is dewormed monthly and has an antiparasitic on board so that she doesn't get fleas and bring them into your house. It is such a pain to get rid of fleas once they are inside. Good luck and have a Happy Valentine's Day!
Dr. Jeff
ps. call the office to find out what the best parasite control protocol is, and don't waste your money on those over the counter Walmart specials that don't work.
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I have a sweet Addisonian mixed breed dog who has lived in the city most of her life but has gradually adapted to the ways of the farm. Zoos comes with me to the vineyard and digs through the snow for hours in the grapevine rows rousting voles and mice. She has even caught and eaten some! Her tail wags most of the time so she must enjoy it although it looks like a very exhausting activity to me. Do I need to consider any hazards like rodent fleas, bubonic plague or other problems she might encounter while she pursues this hobby? She is getting plenty of good food so she can't really be that hungry.
Max in Hotchkiss
Dear Max,
Good question. Sounds like Zoos is having a good time, keeping your orchard free from pests. Your question brings up a couple of things to discuss. First the "wagging tail." Did you know that almost all dog bites occur when a dog is wagging its tail? No, you say? Yes, I say. Remember dogs are really non-verbal communicators and the tail plays a very important role in NVC(non-verbal communication). In canine NVC the tail is like a flag that is saying 'pay attention.' A scared dog will have the tail between the legs or very low, but it will be wagging. A very aggressive dog will have its tail straight up (or maybe over its back) and it will be wagging, saying to everyone who can see it, "I'm ready for a fight!" The happy dog tail is somewhere between those two extremes, and saying "Come pet me." Zoos sounds like a nice dog, but when she's in hunting mode, I'll bet her tail is more stiff like an aggressive dog and you want to be a little careful not to startle her when her honker is buried in the snow. I know, Zoos is really nice and would never bite anybody... Back to the plague(yersinia pestis). Although dogs tend to be more resistant to plague than humans or cats, they can get it and die, but before that they can give it to us. Here in the southwest, it is the prairie dog who carries the fleas that spread plague. It would be very rare for a vole or a mouse to harbor those fleas, but it could happen. I would be more concerned with round worms and tapeworms which most voles and mice carry. Guess what? You can get round worms from your dog, which can crawl around under your skin or enter the back of your eyeball (check our 'ocular larval migrans' on google) and cause you to go blind. For this reason, I would make sure that Zoos is dewormed monthly and has an antiparasitic on board so that she doesn't get fleas and bring them into your house. It is such a pain to get rid of fleas once they are inside. Good luck and have a Happy Valentine's Day!
Dr. Jeff
ps. call the office to find out what the best parasite control protocol is, and don't waste your money on those over the counter Walmart specials that don't work.
January 2016
Dear Dr. Jeff,
It is so cold out, how do I know if my dog is cold? Does he need a coat and booties? Should I keep him inside or just let him out for a few minutes at a time? I don't want him to get frostbitten.
Sincerely,
Eleanor
Dear Eleanor,
Can I call you Elli? Well, Elli, let me jump back in time to September 2015. I'll give a quick review of the Sept. Litterbox question from Charlie, who asked, "why are there so few fawns this year?" To which the DOW responded, "There's the same number of fawns, its just that the grass is so tall you can't see them." To which Karnac the Magnificent (that's me in case you're wondering) responded, "We are in for a big snow this winter, and the does(mommy deer) know something we don't." Make that 1 for Dr J and 0 for the DOW. But who's keeping score... Sorry, Elli, just had to say it. So the first part of the question. You know your dog is cold when he is standing at the door shivering. Or when you call him and he is frozen to the ground. Shivering is probably the best indicator, though. And the fact that he wants to be inside where its warm. Or if he were to stand on three feet, and alternately hold one up to his feathery breast to warm it. Oops, that's my duck that does that. Poor guy needs a hot tub. Anyway, to address the clothing issue, you didn't tell me what kind of dog you have. The arctic breeds and other breeds with a good guard coat and an undercoat don't need booties and sweaters, and usually love this cold weather, basking in the snow and all (they really suffer in the summer). Smaller and short-haired breeds ten to be affected more and need clothing and more indoor time. As a rule, they will let you know when they've had enough. If you're still not sure, bring Fido in and I'll tell how cold-hearty your pooch is.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff,
It is so cold out, how do I know if my dog is cold? Does he need a coat and booties? Should I keep him inside or just let him out for a few minutes at a time? I don't want him to get frostbitten.
Sincerely,
Eleanor
Dear Eleanor,
Can I call you Elli? Well, Elli, let me jump back in time to September 2015. I'll give a quick review of the Sept. Litterbox question from Charlie, who asked, "why are there so few fawns this year?" To which the DOW responded, "There's the same number of fawns, its just that the grass is so tall you can't see them." To which Karnac the Magnificent (that's me in case you're wondering) responded, "We are in for a big snow this winter, and the does(mommy deer) know something we don't." Make that 1 for Dr J and 0 for the DOW. But who's keeping score... Sorry, Elli, just had to say it. So the first part of the question. You know your dog is cold when he is standing at the door shivering. Or when you call him and he is frozen to the ground. Shivering is probably the best indicator, though. And the fact that he wants to be inside where its warm. Or if he were to stand on three feet, and alternately hold one up to his feathery breast to warm it. Oops, that's my duck that does that. Poor guy needs a hot tub. Anyway, to address the clothing issue, you didn't tell me what kind of dog you have. The arctic breeds and other breeds with a good guard coat and an undercoat don't need booties and sweaters, and usually love this cold weather, basking in the snow and all (they really suffer in the summer). Smaller and short-haired breeds ten to be affected more and need clothing and more indoor time. As a rule, they will let you know when they've had enough. If you're still not sure, bring Fido in and I'll tell how cold-hearty your pooch is.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff December 2015
I saw a bumper sticker on a van the other day that said, "My German Shepherd is smarter than your Honor Student." Is that true?
Ron in Eckert
Dear Ron,
Let me start off in a different direction (unusual, I know, normally I'm never side-tracked and focused like a laser, right?). I talked to Heather Tietz the other day. Heather and Dan want to thank you for being such great people. Not just great pet owners, we already knew that, but generous, good people. Ok, back to the question. My first impression was, "that's the dumbest question I ever heard," but after a day or two of letting it ruminate and watching kids today with iphones, ipads, and whatever other electronic devices I don't know the names of, I had to do a little research. Here's what I found: In a Japanese study of several high school teens it was found that playing a video game only stimulated parts of the brain associated with vision and movement while teens doing a simple mathematical exercise stimulated activity in both the right and left hemispheres of the frontal lobe. So what? The frontal lobe is the part of the brain that is associated with learning, emotions and memory. Your frontal lobe grows until you are about 20 years old.
The authors of this study found that reading aloud also stimulates children’s frontal lobes. The more research I did, the more I found that "screen time" whether video games, Facebook, twitter, etc, decreases gray matter (especially in the frontal lobe), white matter and cortical thickness. Atrophy (shrinkage) of these three areas leads to impaired cognitive function, ie. stupidity. In South Korea there is a recognized disorder in young people called “digital dementia.” Which is defined as a deterioration of cognitive abilities resulting from over-use of computers, smart phones, and the Internet in general. So, due to the increased screen time children oftoday have, maybe that bumper sticker you saw is true and the German Shepherd is smarter than somebody's honor student. One of the interesting things I found during this research is that cursive writing, not printing, really stimulates frontal lobe size and activity. Guess what? Delta county school district doesn't teach cursive writing anymore! Another interesting fact I scrounged up is that children of tech giant owners, CEO's or other founders of companies like Apple, Google and Cisco go to schools where there are NO computers! No ipads, techno gadgets, or other time-sucking devices, even in the name of learning. They know the advantages of reading out loud and writing on chalkboards. I guess if you're a parent or grandparent of a child younger than 20 years old, you might want to get rid of the gadgets and games, spend some time with your kids teaching them the stuff you learned before computers. That way, some day you can get a bumper sticker that says, "My honor student is smarter than your pug."
Dr. Jeff
I saw a bumper sticker on a van the other day that said, "My German Shepherd is smarter than your Honor Student." Is that true?
Ron in Eckert
Dear Ron,
Let me start off in a different direction (unusual, I know, normally I'm never side-tracked and focused like a laser, right?). I talked to Heather Tietz the other day. Heather and Dan want to thank you for being such great people. Not just great pet owners, we already knew that, but generous, good people. Ok, back to the question. My first impression was, "that's the dumbest question I ever heard," but after a day or two of letting it ruminate and watching kids today with iphones, ipads, and whatever other electronic devices I don't know the names of, I had to do a little research. Here's what I found: In a Japanese study of several high school teens it was found that playing a video game only stimulated parts of the brain associated with vision and movement while teens doing a simple mathematical exercise stimulated activity in both the right and left hemispheres of the frontal lobe. So what? The frontal lobe is the part of the brain that is associated with learning, emotions and memory. Your frontal lobe grows until you are about 20 years old.
The authors of this study found that reading aloud also stimulates children’s frontal lobes. The more research I did, the more I found that "screen time" whether video games, Facebook, twitter, etc, decreases gray matter (especially in the frontal lobe), white matter and cortical thickness. Atrophy (shrinkage) of these three areas leads to impaired cognitive function, ie. stupidity. In South Korea there is a recognized disorder in young people called “digital dementia.” Which is defined as a deterioration of cognitive abilities resulting from over-use of computers, smart phones, and the Internet in general. So, due to the increased screen time children oftoday have, maybe that bumper sticker you saw is true and the German Shepherd is smarter than somebody's honor student. One of the interesting things I found during this research is that cursive writing, not printing, really stimulates frontal lobe size and activity. Guess what? Delta county school district doesn't teach cursive writing anymore! Another interesting fact I scrounged up is that children of tech giant owners, CEO's or other founders of companies like Apple, Google and Cisco go to schools where there are NO computers! No ipads, techno gadgets, or other time-sucking devices, even in the name of learning. They know the advantages of reading out loud and writing on chalkboards. I guess if you're a parent or grandparent of a child younger than 20 years old, you might want to get rid of the gadgets and games, spend some time with your kids teaching them the stuff you learned before computers. That way, some day you can get a bumper sticker that says, "My honor student is smarter than your pug."
Dr. Jeff
November 2015
I did not receive any questions that I wanted to answer this month. You guys are going to have to do better to stimulate my gastric juices into a litter box rant. So I'm going to tell you a little story because the season of giving is upon us. It's a story of how a young boy and his family have left a permanent impression on me (I hope for the better, although some of you may disagree). So anyway, it started when we moved here back in in 2009 (April 1st, I guess the joke's been on me ever since). I heard about a boy in my daughter's preschool class being diagnosed with a brain tumor. I thought to myself, wow, that's sad, but that's about as far as I would let my emotions go. Time ticked on and I didn't think much about what this family was going through. I am sure it is some sort of mental defense mechanism to keep the marginally sane from going crazy out here in God's country. Then I was reminded of this family when Kindergarten started. Two or three times a week during school pick up I would see a man or woman with a little boy in a wheelchair whose body was weak from cancer and chemotherapy. Sometimes they would be gone for weeks at a time, and I would wonder what happened. It was almost a relief when they were not there. I felt vulnerable and scared when I saw them. Could that be me someday with one of my kids, Winnie or Tori or Alex or Gus? I could not even think about it. Avoidance is the best mental defense, right? Back to the story. We manage to get through Kindergarten and then first grade is upon us. The boy is back, but not the same parents. The man (the one who made the biggest impression on me) who looks like he has not slept, shaved or bathed for weeks now brings the boy. Maybe there is a woman, but I don't see her. I remember asking Susie why God would do this, and are our kids going to be next? The smartest person I know did not have an answer I could believe in. This young child's name is Wyatt Tietz. When I saw them at school, I could see the cancer going through his parents, Dan and Heather, as well. Wyatt died in early December of 2011. What's the point, you may ask. Numero uno, I sincerely hope none of you, or me, ever have to go through something like this. Number two, Heather and Dan run the Wyatt Tietz Foundation. This is a foundation in which 100% of the funds raised go to help families of children diagnosed with cancer get to the front range to the hospitals so their children can receive treatment. Number three, please remember this is the season of giving. If you have a heart that this story has touched, it's time to get out your checkbook and write a check for $20, put it in an envelope, and mail it to The Wyatt Tietz Foundation, 12575 2190 Rd, Eckert, CO 81418. You can also give online at their website. Let's all work together to not let money keep a family in our county from getting their child with cancer the care they need. Thank you.
I did not receive any questions that I wanted to answer this month. You guys are going to have to do better to stimulate my gastric juices into a litter box rant. So I'm going to tell you a little story because the season of giving is upon us. It's a story of how a young boy and his family have left a permanent impression on me (I hope for the better, although some of you may disagree). So anyway, it started when we moved here back in in 2009 (April 1st, I guess the joke's been on me ever since). I heard about a boy in my daughter's preschool class being diagnosed with a brain tumor. I thought to myself, wow, that's sad, but that's about as far as I would let my emotions go. Time ticked on and I didn't think much about what this family was going through. I am sure it is some sort of mental defense mechanism to keep the marginally sane from going crazy out here in God's country. Then I was reminded of this family when Kindergarten started. Two or three times a week during school pick up I would see a man or woman with a little boy in a wheelchair whose body was weak from cancer and chemotherapy. Sometimes they would be gone for weeks at a time, and I would wonder what happened. It was almost a relief when they were not there. I felt vulnerable and scared when I saw them. Could that be me someday with one of my kids, Winnie or Tori or Alex or Gus? I could not even think about it. Avoidance is the best mental defense, right? Back to the story. We manage to get through Kindergarten and then first grade is upon us. The boy is back, but not the same parents. The man (the one who made the biggest impression on me) who looks like he has not slept, shaved or bathed for weeks now brings the boy. Maybe there is a woman, but I don't see her. I remember asking Susie why God would do this, and are our kids going to be next? The smartest person I know did not have an answer I could believe in. This young child's name is Wyatt Tietz. When I saw them at school, I could see the cancer going through his parents, Dan and Heather, as well. Wyatt died in early December of 2011. What's the point, you may ask. Numero uno, I sincerely hope none of you, or me, ever have to go through something like this. Number two, Heather and Dan run the Wyatt Tietz Foundation. This is a foundation in which 100% of the funds raised go to help families of children diagnosed with cancer get to the front range to the hospitals so their children can receive treatment. Number three, please remember this is the season of giving. If you have a heart that this story has touched, it's time to get out your checkbook and write a check for $20, put it in an envelope, and mail it to The Wyatt Tietz Foundation, 12575 2190 Rd, Eckert, CO 81418. You can also give online at their website. Let's all work together to not let money keep a family in our county from getting their child with cancer the care they need. Thank you.
Dear Dr. Jeff, October 2015
A few months ago in your newsletter you mentioned that you are Catholic. Watching the Pope on TV all this week got me thinking. What do you think Pope Francis' take on pets is?
Mary in Cedaredge
Dear Mary,
Wow! Who is Pope Francis? I thought we still had John Paul. Where have I been? Oh yeah, my wife won't let me have TV, so I'm totally out of the loop. Do you think Pope Francis knows that St. Francis of Assisi is the patron saint of animals? I wonder if he has any pets. I think he does. My guess is a Turkish Van cat. The Vatican Cat... that would be an amazing place for a cat, I know a few of mine would take that spot in a heartbeat. Just imagine the number of holy lint rollers that the Pope must go through! You know he can't go out in public with white hair all over his bright green robes. How am I doing at avoiding your question, Mary? OK, I'll take a stab at it. Pope Francis believes that we should be good stewards of the environment. Sooo... If you believe having pets makes us good stewards then I think he's all in. But if you think like PETA and that having pets is bad stewardship and walking all over the animal's rights, then maybe the Pope would think they are an excess or a luxury. Hmm, maybe next time he is in town, I'll have to ask him. Do you think I'll get past the security detail?
Dr. Jeff
A few months ago in your newsletter you mentioned that you are Catholic. Watching the Pope on TV all this week got me thinking. What do you think Pope Francis' take on pets is?
Mary in Cedaredge
Dear Mary,
Wow! Who is Pope Francis? I thought we still had John Paul. Where have I been? Oh yeah, my wife won't let me have TV, so I'm totally out of the loop. Do you think Pope Francis knows that St. Francis of Assisi is the patron saint of animals? I wonder if he has any pets. I think he does. My guess is a Turkish Van cat. The Vatican Cat... that would be an amazing place for a cat, I know a few of mine would take that spot in a heartbeat. Just imagine the number of holy lint rollers that the Pope must go through! You know he can't go out in public with white hair all over his bright green robes. How am I doing at avoiding your question, Mary? OK, I'll take a stab at it. Pope Francis believes that we should be good stewards of the environment. Sooo... If you believe having pets makes us good stewards then I think he's all in. But if you think like PETA and that having pets is bad stewardship and walking all over the animal's rights, then maybe the Pope would think they are an excess or a luxury. Hmm, maybe next time he is in town, I'll have to ask him. Do you think I'll get past the security detail?
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I have noticed that there are fewer fawns this year. In years past I have seen many does with twins and a lot of babies. This year many does do not have any babies, and the few that do only have one. What's up? (too much marijuana? - just kidding)
Charlie in Cedaredge
Dear Charlie,
You're such a smart a__! You know that pot thing is a touchy subject. Great question. I was talking to Megan about a month ago about the same topic. I have called our local DOW rep, and left messages to call me back, but I have not yet been able to get an expert opinion. So you're stuck with my opinion. Hah! It is either some type of disease or an act of God! Because our trusty DOW won't return my call to tell me about chronic wasting or some cervidae outbreak, I'm going with an act of God. All you God-haters try to follow along, before you start with the angry phone calls and emails. {by the way, I got several slap-on-the-back emails after last month's Litterbox - thanks guys, that means a lot to me} First, you would think there would be a ton of newborns and a high survival rate with the mild winter and all the grass in the fields and mountains, unless... Something big comes our way and the does know it, consciously or subconsciously, and don't want to wast any energy they might need to survive. According to weather experts (and my farmer's almanac) this is going to be an El Nino weather year. That means a lot of snow, which will bury the grass. Get my drift? There won't be much food, so why would a doe spend all her energy raising a fawn that will compete with her for food? She wouldn't if she had some innate sense that did not let her cycle last November. Amazing.
Dr. Jeff
P.S. another good hint that it is going to be a stellar snow year is the fact that I won a season pass to Powderhorn at the Wyatt Tietz Golf Tournament. Let winter begin!
HOLD THE PRESSES!! I just got off the phone with our local DOW representative, Cody Purcell. Of course, after I finished my Litterbox letter. Well dang, now I've got competition for sage advice. Cody has been dealing with this question also (wonder if he's got a DOW version of The Litterbox?). Anyway, according to Cody, there is not a decline in fawn numbers, disease, or an increase in predation. Its just harder to see the fawns due to the taller grass. I guess that's why the DOW guys make the big bucks. Get it? Big bucks? Not does...
I have noticed that there are fewer fawns this year. In years past I have seen many does with twins and a lot of babies. This year many does do not have any babies, and the few that do only have one. What's up? (too much marijuana? - just kidding)
Charlie in Cedaredge
Dear Charlie,
You're such a smart a__! You know that pot thing is a touchy subject. Great question. I was talking to Megan about a month ago about the same topic. I have called our local DOW rep, and left messages to call me back, but I have not yet been able to get an expert opinion. So you're stuck with my opinion. Hah! It is either some type of disease or an act of God! Because our trusty DOW won't return my call to tell me about chronic wasting or some cervidae outbreak, I'm going with an act of God. All you God-haters try to follow along, before you start with the angry phone calls and emails. {by the way, I got several slap-on-the-back emails after last month's Litterbox - thanks guys, that means a lot to me} First, you would think there would be a ton of newborns and a high survival rate with the mild winter and all the grass in the fields and mountains, unless... Something big comes our way and the does know it, consciously or subconsciously, and don't want to wast any energy they might need to survive. According to weather experts (and my farmer's almanac) this is going to be an El Nino weather year. That means a lot of snow, which will bury the grass. Get my drift? There won't be much food, so why would a doe spend all her energy raising a fawn that will compete with her for food? She wouldn't if she had some innate sense that did not let her cycle last November. Amazing.
Dr. Jeff
P.S. another good hint that it is going to be a stellar snow year is the fact that I won a season pass to Powderhorn at the Wyatt Tietz Golf Tournament. Let winter begin!
HOLD THE PRESSES!! I just got off the phone with our local DOW representative, Cody Purcell. Of course, after I finished my Litterbox letter. Well dang, now I've got competition for sage advice. Cody has been dealing with this question also (wonder if he's got a DOW version of The Litterbox?). Anyway, according to Cody, there is not a decline in fawn numbers, disease, or an increase in predation. Its just harder to see the fawns due to the taller grass. I guess that's why the DOW guys make the big bucks. Get it? Big bucks? Not does...
The Last of the Pot Letters
Dear Dr. Jeff,
Several years ago my father died of cancer and the only thing that kept him from being sick during his chemotherapy was marijuana. Why are you so anti-pot?
Ann in Cedaredge
Dear Ann,
Sorry for the loss of your father. And thank you for the intelligent marijuana question. In response to last month’s Litterbox, I received a lot of angry responses over the phone and email, all of which were anonymous. Funny thing, we have caller ID, so they really weren’t that anonymous. What is with the anonymity thing? Ann, you were the only one to use your name. Here are some of the interesting things people had to say: “You are a jerk, I would never use your vet services,” “You are an evil person,” and these were some of the nice comments (I doctored them up a little to avoid the curse words). Back to you, Ann. I strongly believe in the use of medicinal marijuana if, and only if, it is treated like other pharmaceuticals. Which means only licensed MD’s or DO’s can prescribe it. Only a real pharmacy can fill the prescription (not an herbal bong shop). It is treated as all other Class II and Class III drugs are treated. Sadly, this will never happen because all the pot addicted losers have a greater political influence than the rational people like you and me. Others have suggested that pot is just like alcohol. From my point of view it is not. I’ve been practicing veterinary medicine for 18 years, and I have never seen a dog or cat intoxicated from booze. I have never seen an overdose of a regulated narcotic. But since the legalization of pot, I have seen several cases of marijuana intoxication of dogs. Why is this? Friends who are physicians tell me there are many more cases of pot intoxications of children than all other substances combined. Why is this? Nobody seems to care and many people think it is funny. Even the county prosecutor won’t prosecute (according to a policeman I talked to). If I let one of my children get drunk on the beer I have in the fridge, it is child abuse. No one seems to be standing up against the animal and child abuse from marijuana. But I’m taking a stand, and if you don’t like it, too bad. If I hurt your feelings by the “nastiness” of my words, quit reading The Litterbox! You’ll just get more angry at me, because my opinion is not going to change. For those of you who don’t want to use my services anymore, go back to the January issue of the Litterbox and re-read it. Good luck.
P.S. I have since spoken to the anonymous writer of last month’s litterbox question, and we had a good laugh over her question and my answer.
Several years ago my father died of cancer and the only thing that kept him from being sick during his chemotherapy was marijuana. Why are you so anti-pot?
Ann in Cedaredge
Dear Ann,
Sorry for the loss of your father. And thank you for the intelligent marijuana question. In response to last month’s Litterbox, I received a lot of angry responses over the phone and email, all of which were anonymous. Funny thing, we have caller ID, so they really weren’t that anonymous. What is with the anonymity thing? Ann, you were the only one to use your name. Here are some of the interesting things people had to say: “You are a jerk, I would never use your vet services,” “You are an evil person,” and these were some of the nice comments (I doctored them up a little to avoid the curse words). Back to you, Ann. I strongly believe in the use of medicinal marijuana if, and only if, it is treated like other pharmaceuticals. Which means only licensed MD’s or DO’s can prescribe it. Only a real pharmacy can fill the prescription (not an herbal bong shop). It is treated as all other Class II and Class III drugs are treated. Sadly, this will never happen because all the pot addicted losers have a greater political influence than the rational people like you and me. Others have suggested that pot is just like alcohol. From my point of view it is not. I’ve been practicing veterinary medicine for 18 years, and I have never seen a dog or cat intoxicated from booze. I have never seen an overdose of a regulated narcotic. But since the legalization of pot, I have seen several cases of marijuana intoxication of dogs. Why is this? Friends who are physicians tell me there are many more cases of pot intoxications of children than all other substances combined. Why is this? Nobody seems to care and many people think it is funny. Even the county prosecutor won’t prosecute (according to a policeman I talked to). If I let one of my children get drunk on the beer I have in the fridge, it is child abuse. No one seems to be standing up against the animal and child abuse from marijuana. But I’m taking a stand, and if you don’t like it, too bad. If I hurt your feelings by the “nastiness” of my words, quit reading The Litterbox! You’ll just get more angry at me, because my opinion is not going to change. For those of you who don’t want to use my services anymore, go back to the January issue of the Litterbox and re-read it. Good luck.
P.S. I have since spoken to the anonymous writer of last month’s litterbox question, and we had a good laugh over her question and my answer.
Dear Dr. Jeff,
We have two questions that maybe you would answer in your newsletter. We keep our canary cages in the kitchen. That is where we normally smoke our marijuana. We have noticed that after lighting up, the canaries seem very happy, mellow and sing sweetly (although a little out of tune). Actually after a while the whole kitchen seems to be a bit mellow. Please tell me that marijuana smoke is not harmful to our canaries - so that I can tell my husband to chill out. We have heard that miners used to keep canaries in the mines. Did the miners smoke marijuana to keep their canaries happy?
Looking forward to your reply.
___________________________
(We are not giving our names because we wouldn't want someone to break in and take our happy canaries)
Dear We...,
Tell the truth! You're not giving your name because you can't remember it! When I was young and in school, the teachers would say there's no such thing as a dumb question. Well, you just proved the teachers wrong. If you really need me to answer this question, you need to seek help. OK, enough of my anti-recreational pot rant. All birds (and canaries are birds) are very sensitive to airborne contaminants. Which is why miners would take them into the mines. If the canary died, then the miners would know the air was bad, and evacuate the mine. Similar to the way your brain has evacuated your mind. So your husband is right (something I LOVE to say), don't smoke anything around your canaries. In truth, smoke is not good for any of our pets. Be it tobacco, fire, or pot, animal lungs are easily damaged by the aerosols contained in smoke. Several years ago, there was a study released on cats who lived with smokers. The risk for lymphoma, a type of cancer, was doubled in cats who lived with smokers. The longer the smoke exposure, the higher their risk was. I don't want to sound like I'm preaching, but I'll agree with the teachers on this one: Don't smoke. As a matter of fact, why don't you quit smoking pot all together so your brain will come back and you can appreciate my answer to your questions.
Dr. Jeff
We have two questions that maybe you would answer in your newsletter. We keep our canary cages in the kitchen. That is where we normally smoke our marijuana. We have noticed that after lighting up, the canaries seem very happy, mellow and sing sweetly (although a little out of tune). Actually after a while the whole kitchen seems to be a bit mellow. Please tell me that marijuana smoke is not harmful to our canaries - so that I can tell my husband to chill out. We have heard that miners used to keep canaries in the mines. Did the miners smoke marijuana to keep their canaries happy?
Looking forward to your reply.
___________________________
(We are not giving our names because we wouldn't want someone to break in and take our happy canaries)
Dear We...,
Tell the truth! You're not giving your name because you can't remember it! When I was young and in school, the teachers would say there's no such thing as a dumb question. Well, you just proved the teachers wrong. If you really need me to answer this question, you need to seek help. OK, enough of my anti-recreational pot rant. All birds (and canaries are birds) are very sensitive to airborne contaminants. Which is why miners would take them into the mines. If the canary died, then the miners would know the air was bad, and evacuate the mine. Similar to the way your brain has evacuated your mind. So your husband is right (something I LOVE to say), don't smoke anything around your canaries. In truth, smoke is not good for any of our pets. Be it tobacco, fire, or pot, animal lungs are easily damaged by the aerosols contained in smoke. Several years ago, there was a study released on cats who lived with smokers. The risk for lymphoma, a type of cancer, was doubled in cats who lived with smokers. The longer the smoke exposure, the higher their risk was. I don't want to sound like I'm preaching, but I'll agree with the teachers on this one: Don't smoke. As a matter of fact, why don't you quit smoking pot all together so your brain will come back and you can appreciate my answer to your questions.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff,
I am having a problem with my two little companions that I hope you can help me with. My Scottie, “Mr. T”, has been aggressively attempting to mate with my Bichon, “Prince Geoffrey.” Prince initially tried to resist, but has now just given in to Mr. T’s advances . Being a regular churchgoer and knowing that homosexuality is a sin, do you have any suggestions on how I may curb this disturbing and unnatural behavior? I’m afraid I won’t be able to see my little boys in heaven if this continues. Thank you and God bless.
Irene in Delta
Dear Irene,
Wow! You have a lot going on in this email. And to the rest of you, do you think I could make this stuff up?! Oh, to be a fly reading my mail… Anyway, back to the subject at hand, one dog has a very macho name, Mr. T (“I pity the fool who crosses my path”) and one with a very gayish name, Prince Geoffrey. What do you expect? I mean, come on. Remember that dogs learn from us. What is going on in your house? Just kidding. There are a lot of assumptions you make, one male dog humping another is unnatural, homosexuality is a sin, and last but not least, that our pets go to heaven. I’ll address the most difficult one first. Do our pets go to heaven? I don’t know, I’ll tell you when I get there. Next, is homosexuality a sin? I’m catholic, go to mass everySaturday or Sunday, and am taught that it is. But while an RCIA student, sponsor and coordinator in Phoenix at Most Holy Trinity Catholic Church, this question came up many times. At the time, MHT was not a diocesan parish, but run by the Dominicans, out of the Bay area. If anyone should have a grasp on homosexuality, priests from the “Gay Bay” should. Here is my take from hours spent talking with and listening to the Dominicans. The priests have seen two kinds of homosexuals. Ones who are gay because it is vogue, and ones who are born “that way.” The priests told me, “If you are a priest long enough, you can see children from the time they are born, some are feminine and do not act like the rest of the boys.” They honestly believe these children were born this way. So… if God created us in his image, how do we deal with someone who is totally innocent and born homosexual, created in God’s image? All I can say is “I don’t know. And thankfully it’s not my job to judge.” John 8:7 says “So when they continued to ask him, he lifted himself up, and said unto them: He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.” Wow, powerful stuff! Sad thing is, more often than not, I’m the guy with a rock in his hand, and my arm ready to throw the Nolan Ryan fastball. OK, now down to something I know a lot about… humping. No, now get your mind out of the gutter! One male dog will mount another to show dominance, or sometimes the mounted dog has a urinary tract infection or anal gland problem. So take both dogs to your vet for a complete check up and rectal exam, and take urine for a urinalysis. If everything checks out normal, it’s probably a dominance thing (and maybe not really un-natural, then?) And ask your vet for behavioral advice.
I am having a problem with my two little companions that I hope you can help me with. My Scottie, “Mr. T”, has been aggressively attempting to mate with my Bichon, “Prince Geoffrey.” Prince initially tried to resist, but has now just given in to Mr. T’s advances . Being a regular churchgoer and knowing that homosexuality is a sin, do you have any suggestions on how I may curb this disturbing and unnatural behavior? I’m afraid I won’t be able to see my little boys in heaven if this continues. Thank you and God bless.
Irene in Delta
Dear Irene,
Wow! You have a lot going on in this email. And to the rest of you, do you think I could make this stuff up?! Oh, to be a fly reading my mail… Anyway, back to the subject at hand, one dog has a very macho name, Mr. T (“I pity the fool who crosses my path”) and one with a very gayish name, Prince Geoffrey. What do you expect? I mean, come on. Remember that dogs learn from us. What is going on in your house? Just kidding. There are a lot of assumptions you make, one male dog humping another is unnatural, homosexuality is a sin, and last but not least, that our pets go to heaven. I’ll address the most difficult one first. Do our pets go to heaven? I don’t know, I’ll tell you when I get there. Next, is homosexuality a sin? I’m catholic, go to mass everySaturday or Sunday, and am taught that it is. But while an RCIA student, sponsor and coordinator in Phoenix at Most Holy Trinity Catholic Church, this question came up many times. At the time, MHT was not a diocesan parish, but run by the Dominicans, out of the Bay area. If anyone should have a grasp on homosexuality, priests from the “Gay Bay” should. Here is my take from hours spent talking with and listening to the Dominicans. The priests have seen two kinds of homosexuals. Ones who are gay because it is vogue, and ones who are born “that way.” The priests told me, “If you are a priest long enough, you can see children from the time they are born, some are feminine and do not act like the rest of the boys.” They honestly believe these children were born this way. So… if God created us in his image, how do we deal with someone who is totally innocent and born homosexual, created in God’s image? All I can say is “I don’t know. And thankfully it’s not my job to judge.” John 8:7 says “So when they continued to ask him, he lifted himself up, and said unto them: He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.” Wow, powerful stuff! Sad thing is, more often than not, I’m the guy with a rock in his hand, and my arm ready to throw the Nolan Ryan fastball. OK, now down to something I know a lot about… humping. No, now get your mind out of the gutter! One male dog will mount another to show dominance, or sometimes the mounted dog has a urinary tract infection or anal gland problem. So take both dogs to your vet for a complete check up and rectal exam, and take urine for a urinalysis. If everything checks out normal, it’s probably a dominance thing (and maybe not really un-natural, then?) And ask your vet for behavioral advice.
Dear Dr. Jeff:
My name is Gracie, but my mom has been calling me lots of different things lately. I’m sure you remember me because the first time we met, I gave you some major stink eye and growled until you went and got a muzzle and put it in your pocket. {Snicker.} Anyway, I’m allergic to just about everything, but I’m really allergic to grass. My mom keeps a washcloth handy and tries to wipe me down every time I come back in, but since I go in and out 4,298 times a day, she sometimes misses a few times. And then the scratching starts. All day long and all night long. And I scratch really hard at night to make sure the entire bed shakes and no one sleeps. My mom was so tired and grouchy last week that she decided to make me some turkey and brown rice and mixed vegetables to eat and see if that helped. Boy, that was yummy. It was so good that even my sister will eat it. And my sister won’t eat anything but Milk-Bones, so you know this has to be pretty good stuff. I’m sure you remember my sister. She’s the one that growled at you when you tried to get her out of the kennel and you had to go get someone with a major death wish to get her out. {Snicker. Snort.} Doxies rock! After a few days of the turkey and rice, my itching and scratching was calming down a lot and was almost gone. Then my mom goes and feeds me my regular food today and now I’m a scratching machine again. She will pay for that tonight. And, believe it or not, I'm finally to my question. My mom heard that you have written a cookbook and she wants to know if it has a recipe that will help me with my itching problem and keep me and my sister healthy so we don’t have to come growl at you very often. Thank you.
Itchy and Scratchy
Dear Gracie,
Thanks for another shameless plug of my new recipe book. Was your birthday 4/2/98? Did you know that when people have to think of a 4 digit number (like 4,298) they pick a date of birth they are familiar with, usually their own. Which would make you 105 in dog years. Maybe that is why you're so grouchy and growl when you see me. I don't know, I'm just saying... Anyway, let's talk about itching. Dogs will scratch for many reasons. Some will itch because of parasites like fleas, ticks, mange, sarcoptes, scabies and Cheyletiella, just to name a few. Other dogs will scratch because of environmental allergies. Allergens include pollen from trees, grasses, weeds, molds, dust mites, wool, feathers and human dander. After parasites and environmental allergies come food allergies. Are you ready for all the lies and preconceived notions to be debunked? Number 1: Grain and grain-free is crap! Research has shown that less than 1% of food allergy or dietary intolerances are due to grain. So that leaves protein as the #1 allergen in food, by a long shot! The grain allergy thing was invented by the BARF diet folks who want you to buy their pre-packaged "raw" foods or raw food supplements. Unfortunately, the pet food manufacturers use this in their marketing scams to make you buy their food. This idea has been pushed so much by Wall Street that there are even vets who believe it to be true. It's the protein!! And not just the pure protein by itself. Here's my reality as I see it: Pure unprocessed protein, lightly cooked (just enough to kill germs like salmonella, E. coli, and Listeria) with no preservatives added has very little to no allergic effect. That's because God made animals this way. It's when we add preservatives like sulfates and nitrates that our animals become hypersensitive to proteins like chicken, beef, lamb, etc. That is the reason all animals who are on novel protein diets like duck, venison and whitefish eventually become allergic to those, too. That is what preservatives do. I've had at least two animals lately who have been diagnosed at other vet clinics with beef allergies be fed beef recipes from my book who have no pruritis (that's itchy for you potheads). The only difference between my recipes and store bought food is preservatives. So the long of the short of it is that all dogs and cats can benefit from a NO preservatives, non-processed diet! This is the tip of the iceberg. There are some very scary things going on in the pet food manufacturing industry, that only a few people know about. They are the unlucky ones who actually had to sit through one of my scary lectures. I'll leave you with a quote from Bill Bishop, the ad-man of Blue Buffalo brand pet foods (who is currently being sued by Purina for false advertising) “Slap on a good label, come up with a slogan, and off you go. There were already a lot of smoke and mirrors in how pet food was advertised, and that was the sort of stuff we were good at.”
Dr Jeff
P.S. If you are interested in the Blue Buffalo scandal and would like to read more, you can do so here.
My name is Gracie, but my mom has been calling me lots of different things lately. I’m sure you remember me because the first time we met, I gave you some major stink eye and growled until you went and got a muzzle and put it in your pocket. {Snicker.} Anyway, I’m allergic to just about everything, but I’m really allergic to grass. My mom keeps a washcloth handy and tries to wipe me down every time I come back in, but since I go in and out 4,298 times a day, she sometimes misses a few times. And then the scratching starts. All day long and all night long. And I scratch really hard at night to make sure the entire bed shakes and no one sleeps. My mom was so tired and grouchy last week that she decided to make me some turkey and brown rice and mixed vegetables to eat and see if that helped. Boy, that was yummy. It was so good that even my sister will eat it. And my sister won’t eat anything but Milk-Bones, so you know this has to be pretty good stuff. I’m sure you remember my sister. She’s the one that growled at you when you tried to get her out of the kennel and you had to go get someone with a major death wish to get her out. {Snicker. Snort.} Doxies rock! After a few days of the turkey and rice, my itching and scratching was calming down a lot and was almost gone. Then my mom goes and feeds me my regular food today and now I’m a scratching machine again. She will pay for that tonight. And, believe it or not, I'm finally to my question. My mom heard that you have written a cookbook and she wants to know if it has a recipe that will help me with my itching problem and keep me and my sister healthy so we don’t have to come growl at you very often. Thank you.
Itchy and Scratchy
Dear Gracie,
Thanks for another shameless plug of my new recipe book. Was your birthday 4/2/98? Did you know that when people have to think of a 4 digit number (like 4,298) they pick a date of birth they are familiar with, usually their own. Which would make you 105 in dog years. Maybe that is why you're so grouchy and growl when you see me. I don't know, I'm just saying... Anyway, let's talk about itching. Dogs will scratch for many reasons. Some will itch because of parasites like fleas, ticks, mange, sarcoptes, scabies and Cheyletiella, just to name a few. Other dogs will scratch because of environmental allergies. Allergens include pollen from trees, grasses, weeds, molds, dust mites, wool, feathers and human dander. After parasites and environmental allergies come food allergies. Are you ready for all the lies and preconceived notions to be debunked? Number 1: Grain and grain-free is crap! Research has shown that less than 1% of food allergy or dietary intolerances are due to grain. So that leaves protein as the #1 allergen in food, by a long shot! The grain allergy thing was invented by the BARF diet folks who want you to buy their pre-packaged "raw" foods or raw food supplements. Unfortunately, the pet food manufacturers use this in their marketing scams to make you buy their food. This idea has been pushed so much by Wall Street that there are even vets who believe it to be true. It's the protein!! And not just the pure protein by itself. Here's my reality as I see it: Pure unprocessed protein, lightly cooked (just enough to kill germs like salmonella, E. coli, and Listeria) with no preservatives added has very little to no allergic effect. That's because God made animals this way. It's when we add preservatives like sulfates and nitrates that our animals become hypersensitive to proteins like chicken, beef, lamb, etc. That is the reason all animals who are on novel protein diets like duck, venison and whitefish eventually become allergic to those, too. That is what preservatives do. I've had at least two animals lately who have been diagnosed at other vet clinics with beef allergies be fed beef recipes from my book who have no pruritis (that's itchy for you potheads). The only difference between my recipes and store bought food is preservatives. So the long of the short of it is that all dogs and cats can benefit from a NO preservatives, non-processed diet! This is the tip of the iceberg. There are some very scary things going on in the pet food manufacturing industry, that only a few people know about. They are the unlucky ones who actually had to sit through one of my scary lectures. I'll leave you with a quote from Bill Bishop, the ad-man of Blue Buffalo brand pet foods (who is currently being sued by Purina for false advertising) “Slap on a good label, come up with a slogan, and off you go. There were already a lot of smoke and mirrors in how pet food was advertised, and that was the sort of stuff we were good at.”
Dr Jeff
P.S. If you are interested in the Blue Buffalo scandal and would like to read more, you can do so here.
Hi Dr. Jeff,
Congrats on your new cookbook. Perhaps some day you can make a "Cooking for Cats" book. Anyway, I am getting excited for planting season. I am wondering if it is safe for humans to eat veggies grown in soil used by cats as a litterbox. I hear all sort of tales (tails?) about this but need your take on it please.
Your friend,
Bev
Dear Bev,
Thanks for the really good question. That's a tough one because you used the word safe, which to me implies "riskless." Nothing in life is without risk. Even doing nothing risks missing out on doing something better instead. So based on that useless nonsense, let's talk about what everybody is worried about: Toxoplasmosis. Yes, cat feces (poop) can have toxo oocysts in it, and toxo can make you sick, especially if you are immune compromised, ie. undergoing chemotherapy or HIV positive. Have I scared you yet? Good! Toxo is a disease that can cause all kinds of problems in humans, especially pregnant women. The most common way for people to become infected is by eating undercooked meat, most likely pork, which contain the toxo oocysts. Another way to become infected is to eat cat poop. This is not something I recommend unless you have the late night munchies after smoking some weed. Another way to acquire a toxo infection is to eat unwashed fruits or veggies picked from soil in which an infected cat has defecated. Washing with soapy water or any fruit and veggie wash will remove the oocysts from raw fruit and veggies. Now before all of you cat haters convince your cat-loving neighbors to take Fluffy out, here's an interesting stat: Once a cat is infected with Toxoplasmosis, it will only shed oocysts in the feces for 7-21 days. So Bev, don't eat cat sh--poop, I mean, unwashed fruits or veggies, or undercooked meat. Your life will be a little bit safer, but not much. I think the risk of eating store-bought veggies is probably greater with all the chemicals used to kill bugs. Don't get me going on organics, I'm not convinced they are any safer due to the residues the organic certified pesticides can leave. Come to think of it, cat poop is natural, probably certifiably organic, too...hmm. Until next time.
Dr. Jeff
Congrats on your new cookbook. Perhaps some day you can make a "Cooking for Cats" book. Anyway, I am getting excited for planting season. I am wondering if it is safe for humans to eat veggies grown in soil used by cats as a litterbox. I hear all sort of tales (tails?) about this but need your take on it please.
Your friend,
Bev
Dear Bev,
Thanks for the really good question. That's a tough one because you used the word safe, which to me implies "riskless." Nothing in life is without risk. Even doing nothing risks missing out on doing something better instead. So based on that useless nonsense, let's talk about what everybody is worried about: Toxoplasmosis. Yes, cat feces (poop) can have toxo oocysts in it, and toxo can make you sick, especially if you are immune compromised, ie. undergoing chemotherapy or HIV positive. Have I scared you yet? Good! Toxo is a disease that can cause all kinds of problems in humans, especially pregnant women. The most common way for people to become infected is by eating undercooked meat, most likely pork, which contain the toxo oocysts. Another way to become infected is to eat cat poop. This is not something I recommend unless you have the late night munchies after smoking some weed. Another way to acquire a toxo infection is to eat unwashed fruits or veggies picked from soil in which an infected cat has defecated. Washing with soapy water or any fruit and veggie wash will remove the oocysts from raw fruit and veggies. Now before all of you cat haters convince your cat-loving neighbors to take Fluffy out, here's an interesting stat: Once a cat is infected with Toxoplasmosis, it will only shed oocysts in the feces for 7-21 days. So Bev, don't eat cat sh--poop, I mean, unwashed fruits or veggies, or undercooked meat. Your life will be a little bit safer, but not much. I think the risk of eating store-bought veggies is probably greater with all the chemicals used to kill bugs. Don't get me going on organics, I'm not convinced they are any safer due to the residues the organic certified pesticides can leave. Come to think of it, cat poop is natural, probably certifiably organic, too...hmm. Until next time.
Dr. Jeff
March 5, 2015
Hello Dr. Jeff,
Your new book "Cooking with Buck" is such a great idea! We all would like for our fur friends to eat the very best possible food, and be able to stay healthy and live a long life. Gee, that sounds like a plan for us two-legged folks as well. Is there a list somewhere that defines what we should and shouldn't feed our dogs? Our Wilbur loves apples. Are they OK? How about cheese? Eggs? Keep up the good work. We all, fur friends included, need your expertise! Thank you.
Baby Doe
Dear Baby Doe,
Great question and thank you for the shameless plug for my new book. People tell me I should promote it more but I feel kind of weird promoting my own book. Some Freudian thing, I'm sure. Here is an incomplete list of people foods you should NOT feed your dog:
1. Grapes. Grapes can cause kidney failure in dogs. At this time the mechanism of action is unknown. To me all we need to know is DO NOT feed dogs grapes or raisins.
2. Onions or garlic. No, it's not because it gives them bad breath, it's because it damages the hemoglobin in the canine red blood cells. This is called methemoglobinemia (go ahead and drop that multisyllabic bomb at the next cocktail party). I have seen dogs with this disease who have been feed too much garlic because their owners think that the garlic will keep ticks off of their dog. WRONG, that's just an old wives' tale. Unless you take it too far and kill your dog and then for sure it won't have any ticks, just maggots. This fact I know, if you hang garlic around your neck it will keep vampires away. This won't work for werewolves (they just need a distemper and rabies vaccines to make them nice).
3. Avacado. Yep, no more guacamole for Pedro the Pekeinese. Avacados contain persin which in large amount is toxic to canines but not people. Persin is found in the leaves, seeds and fruit . I have a friend in Santa Barbara whose dog died of persin toxicity. “Betsy” was an English mastiff and loved to eat the avacados that fell off their avocado trees. It was really sad. She was one cool canine.
4. Foods high in fat. Feeding fido too much fat cat can obesity leading to heart failure, diabetes and arthritis. All three of these things shorten your dog’s life (that means die at an early age for you pot heads who call at 1am). Not only does fat lead to obesity but it can cause a life threatening disease called pancreatitis. FYI in human medicine pancreatitis is said to be more painful than giving birth or passing a kidney stone. So if you like to torture animals feed them lots of table scraps. I know this litterbox is about human food but there are a lot of dog treats that have this same effect. Two of the worst perps are Beggin' Strips and Pupparoni's. One easy test to see if the dog treats are high in fat is to rub them between your thumb and for finger. If your fingers are slimed with fat, the treats are high in fat. Remember pet food manufacturers really do not care about your pet’s health (no matter what the bag says or what celebrity endorses them) they care about their shareholders. By the way, cheese falls into this category, sorry!
5. Macadamia nuts. Seriously, as few as 5 nuts can make a small dog sick. Symptoms include rapid heart rate, tremors, vomiting, and weakness or paralysis of the back legs. So on your next trip to the “islands” don’t bring back chocolate covered macadamia nuts, just memories. Which brings me to...
6. Chocolate. A major “no-no,” especially bakers chocolate but really all chocolates for different reasons. No baker’s chocolate because is contain theobromine which can cause heart arrhythmias which can lead to death. So don’t feed baker's or dark chocolate to Fido. As for milk chocolate, which by the way is my favorite should you choose to contribute to my fat pouch, does not contain theobromine but has sugar and fat, which as we learned before can cause pancreatitis. A bad thing to have if you’re a dog or a human.
7. Seeds from most fruits. Its OK to feed small amount of most fruits to your dog, but no seeds or pits. Seeds and pits of fruit can have small amounts of cyanide which can be toxic in large amounts. Not only can they be toxic, but we have had to surgically remove blockages caused by peach pits. If someone asks about seedless grapes, I will have to recommend that you be nominated to the White House because it seems to me the last few presidents aced the stupid test also. Oops, I just pissed everybody off (only the 3rd time today). What do they say... if you're making people angry you must be doing something right? What does it mean if you're making everybody mad... you must be really right, or maybe just a jerk, I'm really not sure. But I digress. What number were we on? Oh yeah number
8. Caffeine. Don’t give your dog any drinks that contain caffeine such as tea, coffee, Coke, Pepsi, Red Bull, etc. Caffeine can cause heart disturbances and even death.
9. Alcoholic beverages. Duh. You would think everybody would know this. Not so, I had a client in last week who thought it was ok to give a ten pound dog 1/3 of a can of beer. Let's see, I weigh 180 pounds which is 18 times the dog. 18 X 1/3 equals 6. So that would be like me drinking a six pack of beer daily. I guess that’s ok, especially if you're up all night smoking pot.
So there you have it. My incomplete list of foods and beverages you should not feed your dog. Please send comments to The Litterbox at 2 am because that’s just a darn good time of night.
Dr. J
Hello Dr. Jeff,
Your new book "Cooking with Buck" is such a great idea! We all would like for our fur friends to eat the very best possible food, and be able to stay healthy and live a long life. Gee, that sounds like a plan for us two-legged folks as well. Is there a list somewhere that defines what we should and shouldn't feed our dogs? Our Wilbur loves apples. Are they OK? How about cheese? Eggs? Keep up the good work. We all, fur friends included, need your expertise! Thank you.
Baby Doe
Dear Baby Doe,
Great question and thank you for the shameless plug for my new book. People tell me I should promote it more but I feel kind of weird promoting my own book. Some Freudian thing, I'm sure. Here is an incomplete list of people foods you should NOT feed your dog:
1. Grapes. Grapes can cause kidney failure in dogs. At this time the mechanism of action is unknown. To me all we need to know is DO NOT feed dogs grapes or raisins.
2. Onions or garlic. No, it's not because it gives them bad breath, it's because it damages the hemoglobin in the canine red blood cells. This is called methemoglobinemia (go ahead and drop that multisyllabic bomb at the next cocktail party). I have seen dogs with this disease who have been feed too much garlic because their owners think that the garlic will keep ticks off of their dog. WRONG, that's just an old wives' tale. Unless you take it too far and kill your dog and then for sure it won't have any ticks, just maggots. This fact I know, if you hang garlic around your neck it will keep vampires away. This won't work for werewolves (they just need a distemper and rabies vaccines to make them nice).
3. Avacado. Yep, no more guacamole for Pedro the Pekeinese. Avacados contain persin which in large amount is toxic to canines but not people. Persin is found in the leaves, seeds and fruit . I have a friend in Santa Barbara whose dog died of persin toxicity. “Betsy” was an English mastiff and loved to eat the avacados that fell off their avocado trees. It was really sad. She was one cool canine.
4. Foods high in fat. Feeding fido too much fat cat can obesity leading to heart failure, diabetes and arthritis. All three of these things shorten your dog’s life (that means die at an early age for you pot heads who call at 1am). Not only does fat lead to obesity but it can cause a life threatening disease called pancreatitis. FYI in human medicine pancreatitis is said to be more painful than giving birth or passing a kidney stone. So if you like to torture animals feed them lots of table scraps. I know this litterbox is about human food but there are a lot of dog treats that have this same effect. Two of the worst perps are Beggin' Strips and Pupparoni's. One easy test to see if the dog treats are high in fat is to rub them between your thumb and for finger. If your fingers are slimed with fat, the treats are high in fat. Remember pet food manufacturers really do not care about your pet’s health (no matter what the bag says or what celebrity endorses them) they care about their shareholders. By the way, cheese falls into this category, sorry!
5. Macadamia nuts. Seriously, as few as 5 nuts can make a small dog sick. Symptoms include rapid heart rate, tremors, vomiting, and weakness or paralysis of the back legs. So on your next trip to the “islands” don’t bring back chocolate covered macadamia nuts, just memories. Which brings me to...
6. Chocolate. A major “no-no,” especially bakers chocolate but really all chocolates for different reasons. No baker’s chocolate because is contain theobromine which can cause heart arrhythmias which can lead to death. So don’t feed baker's or dark chocolate to Fido. As for milk chocolate, which by the way is my favorite should you choose to contribute to my fat pouch, does not contain theobromine but has sugar and fat, which as we learned before can cause pancreatitis. A bad thing to have if you’re a dog or a human.
7. Seeds from most fruits. Its OK to feed small amount of most fruits to your dog, but no seeds or pits. Seeds and pits of fruit can have small amounts of cyanide which can be toxic in large amounts. Not only can they be toxic, but we have had to surgically remove blockages caused by peach pits. If someone asks about seedless grapes, I will have to recommend that you be nominated to the White House because it seems to me the last few presidents aced the stupid test also. Oops, I just pissed everybody off (only the 3rd time today). What do they say... if you're making people angry you must be doing something right? What does it mean if you're making everybody mad... you must be really right, or maybe just a jerk, I'm really not sure. But I digress. What number were we on? Oh yeah number
8. Caffeine. Don’t give your dog any drinks that contain caffeine such as tea, coffee, Coke, Pepsi, Red Bull, etc. Caffeine can cause heart disturbances and even death.
9. Alcoholic beverages. Duh. You would think everybody would know this. Not so, I had a client in last week who thought it was ok to give a ten pound dog 1/3 of a can of beer. Let's see, I weigh 180 pounds which is 18 times the dog. 18 X 1/3 equals 6. So that would be like me drinking a six pack of beer daily. I guess that’s ok, especially if you're up all night smoking pot.
So there you have it. My incomplete list of foods and beverages you should not feed your dog. Please send comments to The Litterbox at 2 am because that’s just a darn good time of night.
Dr. J
Hey Dr. Jeff,
I used to live in Colorado, PPL (Pre-Pot Legalization). I talked to some homies back there and they said their dog had to go to the vet for eating marijuana. Is that possible?
Steve in Las Vegas
Dear Steve,
It is very possible and likely that your friend's dog had marijuana intoxication. I'll bet your friends were also intoxicated with the wild weed. Since marijuana was legalized in Colorado, we have seen a huge increase in the number of marijuana toxicities in dogs. Of course, they never occur during business hours! Usually we get those calls between 9pm and about 2 am. Is this when the potheads are awake and it's their normal operating hours? Or has the "gonja" finally worn off and they are coherent enough to notice the dog acts like it may be dying? We have had a few cases where the dogs have been out grazing and eaten the plants or trimmings, vs. getting it out of baggies or brownies. So there are quite a few possibilities. Maybe you could write back and help me out with this. I know human hospitals have also seen an increase in child marijuana toxicities, so it's not just pets. So far we've only seen dogs, no cats yet with this problem. But then again, maybe for cats it's not a problem… after all they have their own kitty hash, aka cat nip. Maybe I'll get a sign for the clinic, what do you think?
Dr. Jeff
I used to live in Colorado, PPL (Pre-Pot Legalization). I talked to some homies back there and they said their dog had to go to the vet for eating marijuana. Is that possible?
Steve in Las Vegas
Dear Steve,
It is very possible and likely that your friend's dog had marijuana intoxication. I'll bet your friends were also intoxicated with the wild weed. Since marijuana was legalized in Colorado, we have seen a huge increase in the number of marijuana toxicities in dogs. Of course, they never occur during business hours! Usually we get those calls between 9pm and about 2 am. Is this when the potheads are awake and it's their normal operating hours? Or has the "gonja" finally worn off and they are coherent enough to notice the dog acts like it may be dying? We have had a few cases where the dogs have been out grazing and eaten the plants or trimmings, vs. getting it out of baggies or brownies. So there are quite a few possibilities. Maybe you could write back and help me out with this. I know human hospitals have also seen an increase in child marijuana toxicities, so it's not just pets. So far we've only seen dogs, no cats yet with this problem. But then again, maybe for cats it's not a problem… after all they have their own kitty hash, aka cat nip. Maybe I'll get a sign for the clinic, what do you think?
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, 12/22/14
How do I find a great vet to care for my favorite pet? I am lost about how to decide who will do the best job, and where to even start! Please help.
Hilary from Phoenix
Dear Hilary,
Great question, but before I dig into a serious topic, the new Captain of the Surface Creek Artificial Insemination Team is...(drum roll, please) ... Gini McNair! Warning, this woman could be dangerous! I will be sending the Silver Whiskers program at Black Canyon $25 in Gini's name.
Ok, enough of the fun stuff. Let's tackle a really tough topic. Let me start out by saying not all vet clinics are equal, just as not all veterinarians are equal. Some I would trust with my children and some I wouldn't let pet my cat. If you follow step by step what I recommend, the odds of you finding a great clinic are good. It's hard work but well worth the effort. Step number one is to drive to a clinic you either found by yourself or one recommended to you by someone who takes their own pet there. Here's where the fun begins. From the moment you pull into the parking lot and walk in the door, "What do you feel?" Let your intuition be the guide. If you don't have a good vibe, turn around and walk back out and drive to the next clinic. I once read a book written by an ex-FBI agent about survival in bad situations, and my number one take-away was trust your gut. If it feels wrong, skee-daddle and beat feet! Use this sixth sense to save you and your pet from pain. Whew, that was a lot, but we've just started. If the clinic passed this gut test, now it's time for the sniff test. Does the clinic smell clean or dirty? If the nose smells dirty, walk right out that door. The next step is visual. Is the animal hospital clean and neat? If not, again, walk away. Notice how with these first three steps you only have to use your senses. Now comes the hard part. You have to make contact with a person, a warm body, a homo sapien. This should be pleasant! Somebody should greet you with a smile and be personable. If the receptionist is not personable, stop and walk away. If she (or he) is, then ask three questions. "Does your vet have pets?" is the first (many don't!), "Do you bring your pets here?" And last, but not least, "May I have a tour of your hospital?" If there is a 'no' to any of these questions, walk away. If the vet doesn't have pets, how can he know the feelings a pet owner feels? If the staff won't take their own pet here, what's up? And last, but certainly not least, if you can't get a tour of the clinic, what are they hiding? So there you have it, my down and dirty way to find a vet. Its not easy, but when you find a great vet, you'll know it.
Dr. Jeff
How do I find a great vet to care for my favorite pet? I am lost about how to decide who will do the best job, and where to even start! Please help.
Hilary from Phoenix
Dear Hilary,
Great question, but before I dig into a serious topic, the new Captain of the Surface Creek Artificial Insemination Team is...(drum roll, please) ... Gini McNair! Warning, this woman could be dangerous! I will be sending the Silver Whiskers program at Black Canyon $25 in Gini's name.
Ok, enough of the fun stuff. Let's tackle a really tough topic. Let me start out by saying not all vet clinics are equal, just as not all veterinarians are equal. Some I would trust with my children and some I wouldn't let pet my cat. If you follow step by step what I recommend, the odds of you finding a great clinic are good. It's hard work but well worth the effort. Step number one is to drive to a clinic you either found by yourself or one recommended to you by someone who takes their own pet there. Here's where the fun begins. From the moment you pull into the parking lot and walk in the door, "What do you feel?" Let your intuition be the guide. If you don't have a good vibe, turn around and walk back out and drive to the next clinic. I once read a book written by an ex-FBI agent about survival in bad situations, and my number one take-away was trust your gut. If it feels wrong, skee-daddle and beat feet! Use this sixth sense to save you and your pet from pain. Whew, that was a lot, but we've just started. If the clinic passed this gut test, now it's time for the sniff test. Does the clinic smell clean or dirty? If the nose smells dirty, walk right out that door. The next step is visual. Is the animal hospital clean and neat? If not, again, walk away. Notice how with these first three steps you only have to use your senses. Now comes the hard part. You have to make contact with a person, a warm body, a homo sapien. This should be pleasant! Somebody should greet you with a smile and be personable. If the receptionist is not personable, stop and walk away. If she (or he) is, then ask three questions. "Does your vet have pets?" is the first (many don't!), "Do you bring your pets here?" And last, but not least, "May I have a tour of your hospital?" If there is a 'no' to any of these questions, walk away. If the vet doesn't have pets, how can he know the feelings a pet owner feels? If the staff won't take their own pet here, what's up? And last, but certainly not least, if you can't get a tour of the clinic, what are they hiding? So there you have it, my down and dirty way to find a vet. Its not easy, but when you find a great vet, you'll know it.
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, 11/8/14
Can a female dog get pregnant by more than one male at the same time? As in can two puppies have one dad, two puppies have another dad, and one puppy have another dad all in the same litter? Pretty sure cats can do this, but I have had mixed responses on dogs. I think they can because a stray dog I found was pregnant and some of the puppies look nothing alike.
Bret Ballard, Phoenix, AZ
Hey Bret! Great question. I did not know the answer so I had to call Dr. Greg Burns, a board certified Theriogenologist. (That's French for reproduction. Can you tell my daughters read Fancy Nancy books?) Actually it's probably Latin. In normal canine reproduction, I'm going to say no, it would be unlikely to become pregnant by multiple males. In the wild, dogs usually pair up during this time, so the female is hanging around with just one boyfriend. The female is receptive right around the time of ovulation, but she could be for several days. So if she were running loose and there were multiple intact males around, it would be possible. Or in the case of un-natural breeding, ie. artificial insemination, you could inseminate a female with semen from different males. It all depends on who are the fastest swimmers. All this repro talk reminds me of one day back in vet school, when we had to "collect" semen from an English Bulldog. Yes, a drooling, snorking, wrinkly, ugly-but-cute male Bulldog. There were four of us, but three (including yours truly) had no clue what to do. Thank God my good friend Dr. Mark Holmes (the best vet I know on the front range) did have a clue. If thinking about this puts a smile on your face, imagine the fun four guys, one intact English Bulldog and a pair of latex gloves had! I don't think Mark will ever be the same again. But the rest of us almost peed our pants laughing. Needless to say, we came out empty handed, and did not collect the goods. Poor Mark, he'll never be the same. But the rest of us will always be in debt. For on that day, he rescued our sanity from the stress and sleep deprivation vet school puts on a soul. Did you know what there are places that specialize in collection and storage of animal semen? That is very common with cattle, I've learned since moving out here. Not too much need for that in downtown Phoenix... Anyway, I looked a couple of these places up on the internet and they had really boring names like ABS and reprotech. While doing my little internet search I was trying to think of names of real companies and catch phrases (pun intended), like Navy Federal Credit Union: "we take care of your semen," or Speedo: "we make your swimmers faster!" I know what you're thinking, "Dr J is a fruit cake!" (get it, Christmas season), but I want you guys to come up with a more outlandish catch phrase and I will donate $25.00 to the Silver Whiskers program at Black Canyon Animal Sanctuary in your name. Why this animal charity? Because it is a great program and cause. Until next time. (you can submit your ideas here)
Dr. Jeff
Can a female dog get pregnant by more than one male at the same time? As in can two puppies have one dad, two puppies have another dad, and one puppy have another dad all in the same litter? Pretty sure cats can do this, but I have had mixed responses on dogs. I think they can because a stray dog I found was pregnant and some of the puppies look nothing alike.
Bret Ballard, Phoenix, AZ
Hey Bret! Great question. I did not know the answer so I had to call Dr. Greg Burns, a board certified Theriogenologist. (That's French for reproduction. Can you tell my daughters read Fancy Nancy books?) Actually it's probably Latin. In normal canine reproduction, I'm going to say no, it would be unlikely to become pregnant by multiple males. In the wild, dogs usually pair up during this time, so the female is hanging around with just one boyfriend. The female is receptive right around the time of ovulation, but she could be for several days. So if she were running loose and there were multiple intact males around, it would be possible. Or in the case of un-natural breeding, ie. artificial insemination, you could inseminate a female with semen from different males. It all depends on who are the fastest swimmers. All this repro talk reminds me of one day back in vet school, when we had to "collect" semen from an English Bulldog. Yes, a drooling, snorking, wrinkly, ugly-but-cute male Bulldog. There were four of us, but three (including yours truly) had no clue what to do. Thank God my good friend Dr. Mark Holmes (the best vet I know on the front range) did have a clue. If thinking about this puts a smile on your face, imagine the fun four guys, one intact English Bulldog and a pair of latex gloves had! I don't think Mark will ever be the same again. But the rest of us almost peed our pants laughing. Needless to say, we came out empty handed, and did not collect the goods. Poor Mark, he'll never be the same. But the rest of us will always be in debt. For on that day, he rescued our sanity from the stress and sleep deprivation vet school puts on a soul. Did you know what there are places that specialize in collection and storage of animal semen? That is very common with cattle, I've learned since moving out here. Not too much need for that in downtown Phoenix... Anyway, I looked a couple of these places up on the internet and they had really boring names like ABS and reprotech. While doing my little internet search I was trying to think of names of real companies and catch phrases (pun intended), like Navy Federal Credit Union: "we take care of your semen," or Speedo: "we make your swimmers faster!" I know what you're thinking, "Dr J is a fruit cake!" (get it, Christmas season), but I want you guys to come up with a more outlandish catch phrase and I will donate $25.00 to the Silver Whiskers program at Black Canyon Animal Sanctuary in your name. Why this animal charity? Because it is a great program and cause. Until next time. (you can submit your ideas here)
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, 9/16/14
Nacho here (the little Aussie from Delta). My mom is making me diet because the last time you and I visited you said I was overweight. I'm not fat, I'm just so cute that it overflows! Anyway, mom bought me diet food and has me on portion controlled meals. Just so you know, I don't like it very much, but I have lost a little weight and I do like my Canine Health tablets. They help me feel better! So, the real reason I am writing is that I WANT SNACKS!! My mom doesn't give me people snacks anymore, and I'm not very happy about it. Any suggestions?? Even though you have really disrupted my previously lavish dining habits, I have agreed to the laser therapy treatments you suggested for my shoulder. But please help me out with the snacks?
Hungrily,
Nacho
Dear Nacho,
Did your mother ever get that new diesel Dually? If so, why haven't you called? I really want to pace back and forth in the bed and freak the drivers behind us out. Don't be mad just because I told your mom you needed to lose a couple of L.B.'s. Anyway, good for your mom! She's only looking after your best interest. Nacho, can I tell you a little secret? Don't tell your friends (if they are reading this, tell them to STOP!) "Weight loss and diets suck!" How do I know? I'm on one too! Although let me tell you, both you and I will be thankful for it. And now I've forgotten your question... Oh yeah, people snacks. Try and guess what snacks I get? Go ahead, I dare you. Potato chips? NO! Snickers bars(my favorite snack of all time)? Double NO! Vanilla ice cream with hot fudge and salty ground up pretzels? NO, NO, NO! Here it is. Drum roll please... Carrots, broccoli, and fruit(and right now cherry tomatoes, lots and lots of them!). Bottom line, if it has fat or processed carbs, it's off the menu. Sayonara to the marbled rib eye, adios to avacado, see ya later Snickers bar, auf wiedersehen to the bratwurst train. Get my drift? Did I mention diets suck? Especially the weight loss part. So Nacho, raw, colorful veggies are in. But for you, tell your mom she can feed a dog your size 2 sugar cube-sized pieces of chicken or beef a day, no more. Next time you stop by, I'll share some of my baby carrots. Until then, hats off to your better health, my little friend from down under!
Sincerely,
Dr. Jeff
Nacho here (the little Aussie from Delta). My mom is making me diet because the last time you and I visited you said I was overweight. I'm not fat, I'm just so cute that it overflows! Anyway, mom bought me diet food and has me on portion controlled meals. Just so you know, I don't like it very much, but I have lost a little weight and I do like my Canine Health tablets. They help me feel better! So, the real reason I am writing is that I WANT SNACKS!! My mom doesn't give me people snacks anymore, and I'm not very happy about it. Any suggestions?? Even though you have really disrupted my previously lavish dining habits, I have agreed to the laser therapy treatments you suggested for my shoulder. But please help me out with the snacks?
Hungrily,
Nacho
Dear Nacho,
Did your mother ever get that new diesel Dually? If so, why haven't you called? I really want to pace back and forth in the bed and freak the drivers behind us out. Don't be mad just because I told your mom you needed to lose a couple of L.B.'s. Anyway, good for your mom! She's only looking after your best interest. Nacho, can I tell you a little secret? Don't tell your friends (if they are reading this, tell them to STOP!) "Weight loss and diets suck!" How do I know? I'm on one too! Although let me tell you, both you and I will be thankful for it. And now I've forgotten your question... Oh yeah, people snacks. Try and guess what snacks I get? Go ahead, I dare you. Potato chips? NO! Snickers bars(my favorite snack of all time)? Double NO! Vanilla ice cream with hot fudge and salty ground up pretzels? NO, NO, NO! Here it is. Drum roll please... Carrots, broccoli, and fruit(and right now cherry tomatoes, lots and lots of them!). Bottom line, if it has fat or processed carbs, it's off the menu. Sayonara to the marbled rib eye, adios to avacado, see ya later Snickers bar, auf wiedersehen to the bratwurst train. Get my drift? Did I mention diets suck? Especially the weight loss part. So Nacho, raw, colorful veggies are in. But for you, tell your mom she can feed a dog your size 2 sugar cube-sized pieces of chicken or beef a day, no more. Next time you stop by, I'll share some of my baby carrots. Until then, hats off to your better health, my little friend from down under!
Sincerely,
Dr. Jeff
Dear Dr. Jeff, 4/18/14
Finicky Feline, whose primary diet is a mix of Science Diet Adult Light and Royal Canin Dental, loves chicken livers. Is liver good for cats?
Sincerely,
Pat (Finicky's mom)
Dear Pat,
So your kitty likes liver. It's normal that your kitty should like liver. Cats are obligate carnivores (that means they have to eat other animals) and need to eat things such as liver, meat, hearts, brain and eyeballs. I personally love chicken liver and gizzards... When I was a boy, my best friend's mom would take Kevin and I to a little diner and we would drink vanilla malts and eat fried chicken gizzards out of a little basket til we thought we'd explode. Makes my mouth water just thinking of those tasty tidbits. Kevin's mom was the coolest! She would ride a Schwinn Cruiser around the neighborhood with no hands. She played the ukelele and smoked cigarettes. She was amazing! Kevin and I got into more trouble than 20 boys our age. I remember the time we shot a model rocket into a huge arborvida tree and almost burned the neighborhood down. The flames were as high as... Oops, back to chicken livers. Yes, chicken livers are OK for your kitty, but not as his entire diet. Kitty needs to get the rest of the nutrition little mouses have to offer. Like calcium and magnesium from the bones, taurine from the heart, and all the other good stuff. But as an alternative to feeding whole or ground up mice, you can stick with your commercial diets which are completely balanced for his stage of life. With chicken livers thrown in here and there...
Dr. J
Finicky Feline, whose primary diet is a mix of Science Diet Adult Light and Royal Canin Dental, loves chicken livers. Is liver good for cats?
Sincerely,
Pat (Finicky's mom)
Dear Pat,
So your kitty likes liver. It's normal that your kitty should like liver. Cats are obligate carnivores (that means they have to eat other animals) and need to eat things such as liver, meat, hearts, brain and eyeballs. I personally love chicken liver and gizzards... When I was a boy, my best friend's mom would take Kevin and I to a little diner and we would drink vanilla malts and eat fried chicken gizzards out of a little basket til we thought we'd explode. Makes my mouth water just thinking of those tasty tidbits. Kevin's mom was the coolest! She would ride a Schwinn Cruiser around the neighborhood with no hands. She played the ukelele and smoked cigarettes. She was amazing! Kevin and I got into more trouble than 20 boys our age. I remember the time we shot a model rocket into a huge arborvida tree and almost burned the neighborhood down. The flames were as high as... Oops, back to chicken livers. Yes, chicken livers are OK for your kitty, but not as his entire diet. Kitty needs to get the rest of the nutrition little mouses have to offer. Like calcium and magnesium from the bones, taurine from the heart, and all the other good stuff. But as an alternative to feeding whole or ground up mice, you can stick with your commercial diets which are completely balanced for his stage of life. With chicken livers thrown in here and there...
Dr. J
Dear Dr. Jeff, 3/22/14
Do cats have tonsils?
Ruth D. in Colorado
Dear Ruth,
I find it interesting that you are interested in cats' and dogs' tonsils. Did I see you at the Rockies game 2 rows in front of me, but still in the rock pile (basically out in center field)? It is nice to know somebody I know might be thinking on a different level. Have you ever had your tonsils out? I remember when my older brother did back in the 60's. He got to eat jello, popsicles, and ice cream for a whole week. I did everything I could to convince my parents my tonsils were sick, including crying and whining like a scolded pup. It did not work and I still have mine, and thank goodness! Tonsils are very important in helping to fight disease. They are the first line of defense our immune system has. Doctors now a days rarely take out tonsils because of this fact. Once in a while tonsils are removed, but not on a recurring basis. Dang, I'm rambling today. Ruth, yes, cats and dogs have tonsils, but its not what you think. I used to think tonsils were that hangy thing in the back of our mouths. I watched cartoons and every time somebody would scream, you could see their tonsils. Wrong. That's the uvula. I did not know this until I went to vet school. I even tried to argue the fact with my anatomy professor. Talk about a dumb thing to do! I'm lucky I made it through vet school. Anyway, tonsils are little flaps of tissue with a crypt (hole), and are located in the back of the mouth on the left and right side, not the top middle. Ruth, when we do a dental on a cat or dog with infected teeth, the tonsils are very red and inflamed. On mouths with little dental disease, this does not happen. Dogs with kennel cough also have inflamed tonsils, and very sore throats. Poor little guys. So remember, keep your 4-legged family member vaccinated to help lessen the odds of getting kennel cough, aka tracheitis. Ruth, next time I see you at a Rockies game, remind me to buy you a soda and brat.
Sincerely, Dr. J
Do cats have tonsils?
Ruth D. in Colorado
Dear Ruth,
I find it interesting that you are interested in cats' and dogs' tonsils. Did I see you at the Rockies game 2 rows in front of me, but still in the rock pile (basically out in center field)? It is nice to know somebody I know might be thinking on a different level. Have you ever had your tonsils out? I remember when my older brother did back in the 60's. He got to eat jello, popsicles, and ice cream for a whole week. I did everything I could to convince my parents my tonsils were sick, including crying and whining like a scolded pup. It did not work and I still have mine, and thank goodness! Tonsils are very important in helping to fight disease. They are the first line of defense our immune system has. Doctors now a days rarely take out tonsils because of this fact. Once in a while tonsils are removed, but not on a recurring basis. Dang, I'm rambling today. Ruth, yes, cats and dogs have tonsils, but its not what you think. I used to think tonsils were that hangy thing in the back of our mouths. I watched cartoons and every time somebody would scream, you could see their tonsils. Wrong. That's the uvula. I did not know this until I went to vet school. I even tried to argue the fact with my anatomy professor. Talk about a dumb thing to do! I'm lucky I made it through vet school. Anyway, tonsils are little flaps of tissue with a crypt (hole), and are located in the back of the mouth on the left and right side, not the top middle. Ruth, when we do a dental on a cat or dog with infected teeth, the tonsils are very red and inflamed. On mouths with little dental disease, this does not happen. Dogs with kennel cough also have inflamed tonsils, and very sore throats. Poor little guys. So remember, keep your 4-legged family member vaccinated to help lessen the odds of getting kennel cough, aka tracheitis. Ruth, next time I see you at a Rockies game, remind me to buy you a soda and brat.
Sincerely, Dr. J
Dear Dr. Jeff, 01/12/14
I took my 13 year old dog to the vet the other day, and he recommended a teeth cleaning and told me my dog had to be asleep to have that done. Is it safe to anesthetize my little guy?
Sincerely,
Barb from Colorado
Dear Barb,
Awesome question, and good job taking your dog to the vet! First, you care enough to take him, and second, you're concerned for his safety. NEVER, EVER let a doctor anesthetize a family member, 2 or 4- legged, unless they can do it safely. No matter what you have heard, most anesthetic deaths occur due to bad anesthetic technique, NOT a "reaction" to the anesthesia. That is a lie most vets will tell their clients when a dog or cat dies under anesthesia, so the client doesn't get mad. Shame on those guys! It is my opinion that 99% of anesthetic deaths can be avoided if Safe Anesthetic Technique is used. I'm sure you are thinking, "What is safe anesthetic technique?' S.A.T. is not just a college entrance exam, and not just what your dog does when he listens to you. It's what keeps dogs and cats alive!! S.A.T starts before the anesthesia ever begins. First, we start with a thorough physical exam to make sure heart and lungs sound normal, mucous membranes are pink and wet, and we don't feel anything abnormal in the abdomen or on the skin. After the physical exam, we do a pre-anesthetic blood panel. This lets us look inside the patient and see if the liver, kidneys, and other organs are able to metabolize and excrete the anesthetics. It's amazing how many patients' lives have been saved by this simple test. Once I know that an animal is healthy enough to anesthetize, we will not proceed without an IV catheter. Don't be fooled by subcutaneous fluids(fluids given under the skin-usually in the scruff). Many anesthetists believe giving IV fluids is the most important thing to do during any anesthesia procedure. Gee, we haven't even anesthetized a patient yet and we have increased their survival by 9 fold, what a concept!! After you have asked your vet if he does a thorough physical exam, pre-anesthetic labwork, and an IV catheter, the next question is: can he monitor my pet during the anesthesia? You might be asking yourself, "What is anesthesia monitoring?" Well, let me tell you. There are two main components. Number one is the human component. This is the warm body in the room assisting the vet. It could be another doctor, a C.V.T., or anybody who has been trained in monitoring an anesthetized patient. This person would look at the patient and do what they are trained to do. The second part of monitoring is mechanical. Monitoring equipment is very sensitive and can pick up subtle changes in the patient's quality of anesthesia. If you can pick up subtle changes before they become life threatening changes, the patient will live, not die. Remember, almost all patients die from poor anesthetic technique, NOT anesthetic reaction, unless, of course, you consider an anesthetic reaction a sequele to bad anesthesia. Now you should be asking yourself, "Why don't all vets use S.A.T?" Here's some interesting reasons I hear from vets: #1. It's just a dog or cat. (Are they crazy??) #2. Dr. J, you act like they are human. I get it that they aren't human, but that doesn't mean they are not family members! Since my brothers and I left home, my mom treats her cats better than she ever treated us. #3. It's too expensive to pay someone to monitor and its way too much to buy the right equipment. B.S. (Baloney Soup)! When the courts decide people can sue for damages and emotional trauma, you're going to wish it was an anesthetic reaction, not just bad medicine! One question I have to ask all the "anesthetic reaction" liars: How do you sleep at night? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get the fact that there is a place for low cost spay, neuter, and dental clinics. They are all over the place posing as veterinary practices. Dear Barb, boy, did you get me going! I love concerned pet owners such as yourself. Keep your pet safe. If your vet is afraid to take you in his dental suite and anesthesia area to show you all these things I have just talked about, maybe you should find yourself a new vet. Just walk away from the posers...
Sincerely, Dr. J
I took my 13 year old dog to the vet the other day, and he recommended a teeth cleaning and told me my dog had to be asleep to have that done. Is it safe to anesthetize my little guy?
Sincerely,
Barb from Colorado
Dear Barb,
Awesome question, and good job taking your dog to the vet! First, you care enough to take him, and second, you're concerned for his safety. NEVER, EVER let a doctor anesthetize a family member, 2 or 4- legged, unless they can do it safely. No matter what you have heard, most anesthetic deaths occur due to bad anesthetic technique, NOT a "reaction" to the anesthesia. That is a lie most vets will tell their clients when a dog or cat dies under anesthesia, so the client doesn't get mad. Shame on those guys! It is my opinion that 99% of anesthetic deaths can be avoided if Safe Anesthetic Technique is used. I'm sure you are thinking, "What is safe anesthetic technique?' S.A.T. is not just a college entrance exam, and not just what your dog does when he listens to you. It's what keeps dogs and cats alive!! S.A.T starts before the anesthesia ever begins. First, we start with a thorough physical exam to make sure heart and lungs sound normal, mucous membranes are pink and wet, and we don't feel anything abnormal in the abdomen or on the skin. After the physical exam, we do a pre-anesthetic blood panel. This lets us look inside the patient and see if the liver, kidneys, and other organs are able to metabolize and excrete the anesthetics. It's amazing how many patients' lives have been saved by this simple test. Once I know that an animal is healthy enough to anesthetize, we will not proceed without an IV catheter. Don't be fooled by subcutaneous fluids(fluids given under the skin-usually in the scruff). Many anesthetists believe giving IV fluids is the most important thing to do during any anesthesia procedure. Gee, we haven't even anesthetized a patient yet and we have increased their survival by 9 fold, what a concept!! After you have asked your vet if he does a thorough physical exam, pre-anesthetic labwork, and an IV catheter, the next question is: can he monitor my pet during the anesthesia? You might be asking yourself, "What is anesthesia monitoring?" Well, let me tell you. There are two main components. Number one is the human component. This is the warm body in the room assisting the vet. It could be another doctor, a C.V.T., or anybody who has been trained in monitoring an anesthetized patient. This person would look at the patient and do what they are trained to do. The second part of monitoring is mechanical. Monitoring equipment is very sensitive and can pick up subtle changes in the patient's quality of anesthesia. If you can pick up subtle changes before they become life threatening changes, the patient will live, not die. Remember, almost all patients die from poor anesthetic technique, NOT anesthetic reaction, unless, of course, you consider an anesthetic reaction a sequele to bad anesthesia. Now you should be asking yourself, "Why don't all vets use S.A.T?" Here's some interesting reasons I hear from vets: #1. It's just a dog or cat. (Are they crazy??) #2. Dr. J, you act like they are human. I get it that they aren't human, but that doesn't mean they are not family members! Since my brothers and I left home, my mom treats her cats better than she ever treated us. #3. It's too expensive to pay someone to monitor and its way too much to buy the right equipment. B.S. (Baloney Soup)! When the courts decide people can sue for damages and emotional trauma, you're going to wish it was an anesthetic reaction, not just bad medicine! One question I have to ask all the "anesthetic reaction" liars: How do you sleep at night? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I get the fact that there is a place for low cost spay, neuter, and dental clinics. They are all over the place posing as veterinary practices. Dear Barb, boy, did you get me going! I love concerned pet owners such as yourself. Keep your pet safe. If your vet is afraid to take you in his dental suite and anesthesia area to show you all these things I have just talked about, maybe you should find yourself a new vet. Just walk away from the posers...
Sincerely, Dr. J
Dear Dr. Jeff, 4/29/13
My name is Wonton and I am a 1 year old Siamese. My mom has been a vet tech for 5 years but has never met such a weird cat as me. I act very erratic when anyone other than my mom comes around and am especially terrified of my dad. Also I might have an eating disorder, I eat excessively to the point that I vomit and then go back for more and vomit again. My mom picks up the food but then my brother is hungry all day because I ate all the food before she took it away. Is there anyway we can fix this?
Sincerely, Wonton
My name is Wonton and I am a 1 year old Siamese. My mom has been a vet tech for 5 years but has never met such a weird cat as me. I act very erratic when anyone other than my mom comes around and am especially terrified of my dad. Also I might have an eating disorder, I eat excessively to the point that I vomit and then go back for more and vomit again. My mom picks up the food but then my brother is hungry all day because I ate all the food before she took it away. Is there anyway we can fix this?
Sincerely, Wonton
Dear Wonton,
Your behavior sounds very normal for a Siamese cat, whether it is healthy or not is a whole other question. When I was a young boy growing up in Arizona I had a Siamese cat named Tui Fei. Cool name, huh? I pulled it from a book I read over and over as a kid, Quest of the Snow Leopard. Tui Fei was the name of a group of bandits in China. Well, Tui Fei fit the name! He was psycho. He would only let me pet or touch him and no one else. He had our German Shepherd Dogs in fear for their lives. Now Wonton, you said you run from everything which is the opposite of T.F., but my point it that Siamese cats tend to be at extreme ends of the behavior spectrum, ie. really afraid or really aggressive, picky eaters or gorgers. (I tend to be a gorger, just ask Steve Valenzuela up at Aspen Trails Campground. One day he challenged me to a seven scoop super Sundae and I finished it before he could help another customer. Oh shoot, I'm getting off topic...) Gorging, fear of men... Oh yeah, I'm back. So cats can exhibit abnormal behaviors because we humans screw them up. We don't let them be who they are, which are obligate carnivores. Tell your mom that means hunting and killing machines. When a cat kills something, a lot of cool things happen in their body. Cortisol and endorphins are released. Cortisol is a natural stress hormone and endorphin is a narcotic-like substance works in the brain. Tell your mom to feed you live mice like a snake owner would do. It's really cool when you bite into them. The blood running down your chin and that shrill squeek totally make you feel like the king of the jungle. If that is too gross for your mom, then there are other more sanitary ways to help. I call them environmental enrichment strategies. Sounds like a government operation... Maybe I can get the Obama administration to let me head up the new FLEEA (FeLine Environmental Enrichment Administration). I mean, what the heck, one more government agency to help put people back to work- should be good for the economy AND cats, right? Sorry, off topic again... Some stuff your mom might try: throw the food bowl away and start throwing the food. Studies have shown that cats who eat out of bowls are more stressed than cats who have to look for their food(quasi-hunting). By throwing the food or hiding it all around the house it stimulates a more normal cat behavior. Be sure to tell your mom not to try this with canned food, though. But do sprinkle dry kibble throughout the house. You can't gorge every kibble, so your bro will get some too. Another thing studies show is that cats like vertical feeding. Cats are not 2-dimensional animals like dogs and humans. Ask your mom when was the last time she saw a leopard eating a gazelle on the ground. The answer is never, it just doesn't happen. They drag them up tree. Have mom feed you in high places like the top of the cat condo or on top of the cupboards. Now, if all this doesn't get rid of your brother and dad, come and see me for an appointment. There could be something going on inside those cute little guts of yours.
Dr. J
Your behavior sounds very normal for a Siamese cat, whether it is healthy or not is a whole other question. When I was a young boy growing up in Arizona I had a Siamese cat named Tui Fei. Cool name, huh? I pulled it from a book I read over and over as a kid, Quest of the Snow Leopard. Tui Fei was the name of a group of bandits in China. Well, Tui Fei fit the name! He was psycho. He would only let me pet or touch him and no one else. He had our German Shepherd Dogs in fear for their lives. Now Wonton, you said you run from everything which is the opposite of T.F., but my point it that Siamese cats tend to be at extreme ends of the behavior spectrum, ie. really afraid or really aggressive, picky eaters or gorgers. (I tend to be a gorger, just ask Steve Valenzuela up at Aspen Trails Campground. One day he challenged me to a seven scoop super Sundae and I finished it before he could help another customer. Oh shoot, I'm getting off topic...) Gorging, fear of men... Oh yeah, I'm back. So cats can exhibit abnormal behaviors because we humans screw them up. We don't let them be who they are, which are obligate carnivores. Tell your mom that means hunting and killing machines. When a cat kills something, a lot of cool things happen in their body. Cortisol and endorphins are released. Cortisol is a natural stress hormone and endorphin is a narcotic-like substance works in the brain. Tell your mom to feed you live mice like a snake owner would do. It's really cool when you bite into them. The blood running down your chin and that shrill squeek totally make you feel like the king of the jungle. If that is too gross for your mom, then there are other more sanitary ways to help. I call them environmental enrichment strategies. Sounds like a government operation... Maybe I can get the Obama administration to let me head up the new FLEEA (FeLine Environmental Enrichment Administration). I mean, what the heck, one more government agency to help put people back to work- should be good for the economy AND cats, right? Sorry, off topic again... Some stuff your mom might try: throw the food bowl away and start throwing the food. Studies have shown that cats who eat out of bowls are more stressed than cats who have to look for their food(quasi-hunting). By throwing the food or hiding it all around the house it stimulates a more normal cat behavior. Be sure to tell your mom not to try this with canned food, though. But do sprinkle dry kibble throughout the house. You can't gorge every kibble, so your bro will get some too. Another thing studies show is that cats like vertical feeding. Cats are not 2-dimensional animals like dogs and humans. Ask your mom when was the last time she saw a leopard eating a gazelle on the ground. The answer is never, it just doesn't happen. They drag them up tree. Have mom feed you in high places like the top of the cat condo or on top of the cupboards. Now, if all this doesn't get rid of your brother and dad, come and see me for an appointment. There could be something going on inside those cute little guts of yours.
Dr. J
Dear Dr. Jeff, 8/31/12
I know all about the litterbox, because my mom spanks my butt for eating kitten snacks from the litterbox.......
Anyway, about my question. My name is Nacho Brown, and I am a 10 pound toy Aussie. I throw up every time my mom tries to take me for a road trip. Is there something my mom can do for me to make me feel better, and help me be a better traveling companion??
Nacho from Delta
Dear Nacho,
That is the coolest name for a dog from down under. Have you ever read the "Skippy Jon Jones" series? They are a series of stories about a Siamese Cat named Skippy Jon Jones who thinks he is a Chihuahua. I think it's cool when pet owners come up with off the wall names. Anyway back to the topic. Number one your mom is right, there is nothing more gross than kitty litter braces. Nobody wants kisses from someone with cat poo breath. I would get car sick if I had just eaten litter box tootsie rolls! Nacho, I can think of many reasons why you might throw up when your mom takes you on a road trip (I used to get car sick when I was younger). Is your mom a crazy driver and you just can't take it? Maybe she should let you drive. Speaking for myself, I get queasy on windy mountain roads if I'm not behind the wheel. Have your mom take you down to the local DMV. I know what you're thinking. You're not old enough yet. Wrong! As long as you are 2 years, 3 months and about 15 days old you're in. By my calculations that's 16 in people years. Bataboom batabing you now have that license thing, and I'm not talking rabies license (you should already have one of those)! Now, if your mom won't go for that gig, it's time to hit her up for something a little more dangerous. I call it "Pick Up Truck." Have your mom buy a new GMC 3500 dually Duramax diesel 4X4 crew cab and when she goes on a road trip, you ride in back. When ever I'm behind a truck, the dog in back never looks sick. They're just pacing back and forth having a good ol' time. I feel like vomiting because I'm afraid the dog is going to jump out and be my new hood ornament, but dang, those dogs are living the life! I think that must be like doggy bungi jumping. OK, OK, if your mom doesn't like GMC you can probably get by with a Ford, Dodge, or Chevy, but not one of those other brands. If your mom says "no" to "pick up truck," the next thing might be medication. No Nacho, not for her, for you ya big goof. There are many different things that might help a bloke like you. Have your mom call your doctor and see if there is something they can hook you up with, either herbal or pharmacutical. By the way, if your mom goes for a new GMC, can you swing by my house so I can jump in the back with you? My parents would never let me ride in the back of a pick up and now that I'm old enough to make decisions on my own I'd love to give it a try.
Sincerely, Dr. J
I know all about the litterbox, because my mom spanks my butt for eating kitten snacks from the litterbox.......
Anyway, about my question. My name is Nacho Brown, and I am a 10 pound toy Aussie. I throw up every time my mom tries to take me for a road trip. Is there something my mom can do for me to make me feel better, and help me be a better traveling companion??
Nacho from Delta
Dear Nacho,
That is the coolest name for a dog from down under. Have you ever read the "Skippy Jon Jones" series? They are a series of stories about a Siamese Cat named Skippy Jon Jones who thinks he is a Chihuahua. I think it's cool when pet owners come up with off the wall names. Anyway back to the topic. Number one your mom is right, there is nothing more gross than kitty litter braces. Nobody wants kisses from someone with cat poo breath. I would get car sick if I had just eaten litter box tootsie rolls! Nacho, I can think of many reasons why you might throw up when your mom takes you on a road trip (I used to get car sick when I was younger). Is your mom a crazy driver and you just can't take it? Maybe she should let you drive. Speaking for myself, I get queasy on windy mountain roads if I'm not behind the wheel. Have your mom take you down to the local DMV. I know what you're thinking. You're not old enough yet. Wrong! As long as you are 2 years, 3 months and about 15 days old you're in. By my calculations that's 16 in people years. Bataboom batabing you now have that license thing, and I'm not talking rabies license (you should already have one of those)! Now, if your mom won't go for that gig, it's time to hit her up for something a little more dangerous. I call it "Pick Up Truck." Have your mom buy a new GMC 3500 dually Duramax diesel 4X4 crew cab and when she goes on a road trip, you ride in back. When ever I'm behind a truck, the dog in back never looks sick. They're just pacing back and forth having a good ol' time. I feel like vomiting because I'm afraid the dog is going to jump out and be my new hood ornament, but dang, those dogs are living the life! I think that must be like doggy bungi jumping. OK, OK, if your mom doesn't like GMC you can probably get by with a Ford, Dodge, or Chevy, but not one of those other brands. If your mom says "no" to "pick up truck," the next thing might be medication. No Nacho, not for her, for you ya big goof. There are many different things that might help a bloke like you. Have your mom call your doctor and see if there is something they can hook you up with, either herbal or pharmacutical. By the way, if your mom goes for a new GMC, can you swing by my house so I can jump in the back with you? My parents would never let me ride in the back of a pick up and now that I'm old enough to make decisions on my own I'd love to give it a try.
Sincerely, Dr. J
Dear Dr. Jeff, 8/20/12
Okay, this is a totally and completely ramdom dinner table question: Do cats, and dogs have bellybuttons? And if so, where are they located?
Thanks! Ally from Arizona
Dear Ally from AZ:
Did you know I used to live in Arizona? Man, was it hot! I hope it's cooled down some since I left. Back to your random dinner table question (I'll bet you're a teenager, old people don't use the word random). Anyway, yes, cats and dogs have belly buttons. It is actually called the umbilicus and is the place your and their umbilical cord attached when you all (we just had the nicest extern from Texas A&M here and I am getting the hang of the Texas slang) were in your mommy's tummy. When an animal is born the umbilical cord needs to be severed. Right after the puppy or kitten is born the mother chews it off next to the puppy or kitten. In humans the doctor puts this funny little clip on it and then cuts it. It's really gross. When my first daughter was born the doctor looked over at me and said "it's all yours if you want to cut it off," at that point I passed out for the second time that night (the first time was when my daughter was born... I've never seen so much blood!). Thank God he didn't ask me to chew it off, you know how I feel about human flesh. I just have one question for all of you. When I was born and Arizona was still cooling off, the father to be was not allowed in the delivery room. Who was the first guy to change that tradition? He ought to be ashamed of himself.
Oh! As far the location, it is in the same place as yours, on their belly. They usually don't have "innies" or "outies" just "flatties" and they are covered by hair.
Sincerely, Dr J
Okay, this is a totally and completely ramdom dinner table question: Do cats, and dogs have bellybuttons? And if so, where are they located?
Thanks! Ally from Arizona
Dear Ally from AZ:
Did you know I used to live in Arizona? Man, was it hot! I hope it's cooled down some since I left. Back to your random dinner table question (I'll bet you're a teenager, old people don't use the word random). Anyway, yes, cats and dogs have belly buttons. It is actually called the umbilicus and is the place your and their umbilical cord attached when you all (we just had the nicest extern from Texas A&M here and I am getting the hang of the Texas slang) were in your mommy's tummy. When an animal is born the umbilical cord needs to be severed. Right after the puppy or kitten is born the mother chews it off next to the puppy or kitten. In humans the doctor puts this funny little clip on it and then cuts it. It's really gross. When my first daughter was born the doctor looked over at me and said "it's all yours if you want to cut it off," at that point I passed out for the second time that night (the first time was when my daughter was born... I've never seen so much blood!). Thank God he didn't ask me to chew it off, you know how I feel about human flesh. I just have one question for all of you. When I was born and Arizona was still cooling off, the father to be was not allowed in the delivery room. Who was the first guy to change that tradition? He ought to be ashamed of himself.
Oh! As far the location, it is in the same place as yours, on their belly. They usually don't have "innies" or "outies" just "flatties" and they are covered by hair.
Sincerely, Dr J
Dear Dr. Jeff, 7/20/12
Many years ago when I was a young lad, my best friend at the time had a whacky cat that liked to attack me when I spent the night. Why do you think it did that to me? I usually showered so I don't think I smelled. I don't remember provoking it.
I've lost many a nights sleep thinking about this and was hoping the "Litterbox" might put my mind at ease.
Sincerely,
Kevin from California
Dear KFC (Kevin from Cali):
Do you like fried chicken? I do but my wife is a health food nut so I only get the healthy meats. I digress, do I ever not? Let me guess, your friend's cat was one of the Asian breeds (Siamese, Burmese etc). These breeds tend to be one-person cats and when they feel threatened or like their human-cat bond is in jeopardy, they lash out similar to a jealous spouse. When I was a lad another young lad with whom I played two-man beach volleyball had a Siamese cat-like girlfriend. Yow! She guarded him like a prize mackerel, he could do nothing without her checking up on him. I remember one tournament in San Diego we played in and she drove all the way from Phoenix to check up on him. She guarded her bond with him like your friend's cat did with him. Maybe this is where the term "catty" comes from. Needless to say my friend dumped the Siamese chick but I'll bet your childhood pal's cat lived to be very old in the same ol' household. Maybe the next time you come across another cat like this, instead of showering try a little tuna juice behind your ears.
Sincerely, Dr J
5/12/12
The other day I was at my daughter's kindergarten class giving a presentation about what it is like to be a vet, and a little boy asked me, "Why does my dog bite me?" The first thing that came to my mind was never ask a group of 5 year olds "Do you have any questions?" Then two answers came to my mind. First, your parents let the dog bite you, and second, maybe you taste good to the dog. Gross... the thought of the taste of human flesh. I had a horrible flashback to my younger days when I was watching our black and white TV and a movie about a soccer team whose plane went down in some snowy high place. Either the Himalayas or the Andes, I'm not sure which. Anyway, the guys who survived the crash had to eat the ones who didn't. I was grossed out, blech! If that wasn't enough, about a month later my patents take my brothers and I up to northern California for a family vacation. Where do we end up? Lake Tahoe... Donner Pass... another tragic time in history when humans who were stuck in the mountains(this time the Sierra Nevadas) in the snow and had to consume each other to stay alive. I think this was the straw that took me from normal to abnormal. I had been recovering for 40+ years from this mental trauma and we move to Colorado, where my friend Doug Christner has to inform me about a town called Lake City and some guy named Alfred Packer. What is it with high altitudes, snow and cannibalism?
Sorry, I digress... Dogs bite for many reasons. Some out of fear, some out of aggression. Some breeds bite more than others. Needless to say no dog should ever bite a child. Period. And I will not argue this point.
Dr. J
The other day I was at my daughter's kindergarten class giving a presentation about what it is like to be a vet, and a little boy asked me, "Why does my dog bite me?" The first thing that came to my mind was never ask a group of 5 year olds "Do you have any questions?" Then two answers came to my mind. First, your parents let the dog bite you, and second, maybe you taste good to the dog. Gross... the thought of the taste of human flesh. I had a horrible flashback to my younger days when I was watching our black and white TV and a movie about a soccer team whose plane went down in some snowy high place. Either the Himalayas or the Andes, I'm not sure which. Anyway, the guys who survived the crash had to eat the ones who didn't. I was grossed out, blech! If that wasn't enough, about a month later my patents take my brothers and I up to northern California for a family vacation. Where do we end up? Lake Tahoe... Donner Pass... another tragic time in history when humans who were stuck in the mountains(this time the Sierra Nevadas) in the snow and had to consume each other to stay alive. I think this was the straw that took me from normal to abnormal. I had been recovering for 40+ years from this mental trauma and we move to Colorado, where my friend Doug Christner has to inform me about a town called Lake City and some guy named Alfred Packer. What is it with high altitudes, snow and cannibalism?
Sorry, I digress... Dogs bite for many reasons. Some out of fear, some out of aggression. Some breeds bite more than others. Needless to say no dog should ever bite a child. Period. And I will not argue this point.
Dr. J
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